[Nicole28]

I'm a pretty familiar 'poster' on these forums. I am writing a paper for my ENGL 1200 college class on the adoptees' rights debate, and as always I am interested in both sides of the issue. I have decided to use a survey as a method of research and as a primary resource. ANYONE - adoptees, birthmothers, whomever is welcome to answer these questions, and responses will be MUCH appreciated. I plan on using the most helpful and insightful responses in my paper and as resources to help me consider both sides of the issue fairly. Thank you! (If you choose to answer, can you please include the # of the question before your response so that I can organize responses easily? Thanks!)

1. For adoptees - WHY do you believe that adoption records should be unsealed and available to all adopted persons?

2. For birthmothers - do you agree with the sealed records policies adopted by the majority of US states, or do you disagree and also believe that records should be readily available to adoptees?

3. Do you believe that birthmother's should have the option of signing a 'consent to contact' when they surrender their baby for adoption? Why or why not? Do you think that it is an infringement on a child's rights to allow a birthmother to decide whether or not her surrendered child has access to them once they turn 18?

4. Studies have shown that by NOT providing adopted individuals with access to their birth records, original birth certificates, etc. there are more occurences of emotional distress/disabilities, physical (learning) disabilities, depression, anxiety disorders, identity disorders, personality disorders, etc. Do you agree that prohibiting adoptees from accessing their records contributes to the above disorders, or do you think that the above stem from other causes?

5. Adoptees are denied access to their medical history. Do you think that all adoptees should be provided with regularly updated medical histories?

6. One could argue that a desire to know one's original origin is foolish, because an adopted person has no ties to their birthmother whatsoever - a birthmother is simply what the name (politically correct or not!) implies. Because an adoptee has no legal or 'emotional' ties to a birthmother at all, do you think that searching is out of the question and unneccessary?

7. From a legal perspective, the sealed records policy is viewed as a preventitive measure to avoid possible future conflict between birthfamilies and adoptive persons and their families. Is this a legitimate perspective?

8. Many claim that birthmothers are granted more protection, privacy, and options than their relinquished children? Do you agree, or do you think that this is an unfair claim?


Thank you for your help!!

Nicole

[njschwartz]

I'll give it a go for ya!
I am an adoptee so will answer relevant questions.

#1. I am waiting to make contact with my Bmother PRIMARILY to get biological family medical history. Yes, all the other details as to "Why?" and "How's your life been after relinquishment?" and "Do I have any siblings?" etc. etc. etc. All my life, I have never been able to fill out the "Family History" portion of the Patient Health History. I have had some health issues and feel it's MY CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT to pursue a long life of happiness and peace of mind.

#3. Absolutely! I think it's a crime not to leave the door open. We adoptees all feel the same. Somethings missing...an emptiness that we were unable, or unwilling to face. I submitted my consent forms for b-mom and sibs, only to be so disappointed that there were no corresponding forms in my "file." That was a blow to my heart.

#4. Perhaps. Our psyches are fragile merely by our existence as a human being...hence the term "Human Condition." Any deep emotional pain, whatever the circumstance, can bring on anxiety and/or depression. Having experience in seeking therapy for depression and alcoholism, a big portion of discussion was being given up for adoption. My initial emotional pain began when I was told at 5 years old that I was adopted.

#5. I have answered that question above. To reiterate: ABSOLUTELY!!!!

#6. I do not believe adoptees have NO emotional tie to their birthmother. As we have pre-birth experience in the womb, that theory of no connection could be debated ad nauseum. As an adoptee, I have ALWAYS had an ache to connect with my Bio-mom. Obviously a non-adoptee poses this ridiculous question.
Let's see them stare into the mirror and see no one looking back.

#7. One will find conflict down every avenue of life. What's another conflict? It's Big Brother telling us what we can and can't do. Legitimate perspective? No. Legal perspective? Yes
Fair? NO.

#8. I have not read the legal documents pertaining to relinquishment in California. I would like to very much. I'm sure it has changed since 1955 when I was relinquished. I have been told by other adoptees/adoptive parents that many times the adoption facility would NOT tell the Birthmother that a consent for contact form was available to fill out. Now, THAT'S unfair and probably illegal. Who gave them the right to judge who gets that info and who doesn't? Both sides are virtually kept "in the dark" by a Social Services system that stinks. Paper-pushers who haven't got a clue as to the depth of their responsibilities to their fellow human being.
Again, I would like to see the official document of California pertaining to adoptee/birthparent rights, or whatever it is referred to.

There...hope this helps!
Do you have access to any of these documents, or know where I can go to get them? Any info would be appreciated.

N Schwartz

[Jen30]

1. For adoptees - WHY do you believe that adoption records should be unsealed and available to all adopted persons?
I
#1 do think that everyone who was adopted has a right to those records they are about them right?i was adopted an Social Services gave me an actual timeline of my adoption an a little about my bmom.those records do pertain to us as the adoptees.

2. For birthmothers - do you agree with the sealed records policies adopted by the majority of US states, or do you disagree and also believe that records should be readily available to adoptees?

3. Do you believe that birthmother's should have the option of signing a 'consent to contact' when they surrender their baby for adoption? Why or why not? Do you think that it is an infringement on a child's rights to allow a birthmother to decide whether or not her surrendered child has access to them once they turn 18?

#3 yes i do.since there are alot of adoptees that are having a terrible time looking for their bmom or bdad.the consent for contact is there for if any of the bmom or bdad 's families are searching then they'ed be able to find the adoptee.i was lucky my bfamily had been searching for me an bmom for yrs. but found me instead.

4. Studies have shown that by NOT providing adopted individuals with access to their birth records, original birth certificates, etc. there are more occurences of emotional distress/disabilities, physical (learning) disabilities, depression, anxiety disorders, identity disorders, personality disorders, etc. Do you agree that prohibiting adoptees from accessing their records contributes to the above disorders, or do you think that the above stem from
other causes?

#4 i seriously don't think none of the above can occur.i have a learning disability an it 's not from wanting acess to by birth records mind you I inherited from my bmom.i don't agree that prohibiting adoptees from acessing their birth records contributes to the above disorders.they stem from something else.

5. Adoptees are denied access to their medical history. Do you think that all adoptees should be provided with regularly updated medical histories?

#5 yes i do because lot's of people when they go into a dr. the dr. asks about your medical history an what runs in your family. i now know some of my medical history but not everything.at least if you know your family medical history your not sitting there uh uh uh i don't have a clue to my family medical history an the dr. 's can better asist you.

6. One could argue that a desire to know one's original origin is foolish, because an adopted person has no ties to their birthmother whatsoever - a birthmother is simply what the name (politically correct or not!) implies. Because an adoptee has no legal or 'emotional' ties to a birthmother at all, do you think that searching is out of the question and unneccessary?

#6 no i don't think it's unessary.lot's of us adoptees wanna know where we came from it's not uncommon for adoptees to wanna know where they came from espcially when one does family research.there is ties to the bmom cause she was the one who gave birth to us not the adoptive parents.i'm speaking of matterfactly.even if there is no other contact there is the physical conection i look like my bmom even my bdad had to look twice since he thought he was looking at my bmom.LOL!!

7. From a legal perspective, the sealed records policy is viewed as a preventitive measure to avoid possible future conflict between birthfamilies and adoptive persons and their families. Is this a legitimate perspective?

#7 i think adoptees have a right to acess those records.those records pertain to the adoptees.an not the adoptive parents.

8. Many claim that birthmothers are granted more protection, privacy, and options than their relinquished children? Do you agree, or do you think that this is an unfair claim?

#8 yes i do.not to be mean about it but there are alot of us who wish to find our bparents, even if one of the bparents doesn't want contact the other might an probably was searching for them .

Hi i hope this helps.i'm an adoptee an i've found some of my bfamily now if only i can find my bmom.LOL!!

[sammiesosa]

I only answered the ones i could...
1. For adoptees - WHY do you believe that adoption records should be unsealed and available to all adopted persons?
I believe it should be unsealed for all adoptee no matter the age because they have a right to know who they are from where they were from and who they are. No child should grow up the way they do. a child is a very special thing and it is very hurtful not knowing where your from, who you are, it is not right to base a life on a web of lies.

3.Do you believe that birthmother's should have the option of signing a 'consent to contact' when they surrender their baby for adoption? Why or why not? Do you think that it is an infringement on a child's rights to allow a birthmother to decide whether or not her surrendered child has access to them once they turn 18?

A mother should not have the right to sign over her kid for good and not allow the child to contact her. I would hate not being able to contact my mother because she wouldn’t allow it. She cannot do that, can a child do that to her? It is really not fair how they can do that!

4.Studies have shown that by NOT providing adopted individuals with access to their birth records, original birth certificates, etc. there are more occurences of emotional distress/disabilities, physical (learning) disabilities, depression, anxiety disorders, identity disorders, personality disorders, etc. Do you agree that prohibiting adoptees from accessing their records contributes to the above disorders, or do you think that the above stem from other causes?

Yes, I do belive this is true. Not knowing my real heritage has left me very emotional on ethnic day at school, knowing they have what they are and I am not is not fair I hate the fact that I must suffer while they think they suffer. It is very painful. I do belive that that makes us who we are!

5.Adoptees are denied access to their medical history. Do you think that all adoptees should be provided with regularly updated medical histories?
Yes, everychild should, dose asthma run in my family? Or cancer, should I be taking extra precautions to prevent things that run in my family? Simple things like that. They should have the right.

8.Adoptees are denied access to their medical history. Do you think that all adoptees should be provided with regularly updated medical histories?
Yes they have more rights then us. They can sign us over weather we want to go or not, they have more say in what happens in out life they can sign it so whenwe turn 18 we cant find them, it isn’t fair that they can just discard us like we were puppy dogs, if they don’t want to be found they wont, but if ew don’t want to be found we can be!