[ashleyc223]

I don't exactly know how to start this off, but here goes, I am currently 22 years old and 24 weeks pregnant with my first child and this pregnancy was completely unplanned. I met the father of my child and got pregnant literally a week after knowing him. *He removed the condom during intercourse without my knowledge*. So here I am. I never considered abortion just because I believe this situation is my responsibility to deal with. I had been planning all along to keep my child but as I found out more about the father of my child I have become more and more weary of keeping the child around him. He lied to me about everything under the moon, and I recently found out he is a felon and under 5 years probation for deadly assault with a firearm. I don't exactly understand how he never went to prison for this but it is besides the point I suppose. He is fully aware of the pregnancy and has threatened to take the child from me multiple times. There is no way he would even consider signing his rights away. I've found myself lately contemplating adoption to keep this innocent baby away from his father. I myself lost my job when they found out I was pregnant and have been receiving all the support possible from my mother. I've come to a dead end in this issue because I've read through multiple sources online that a birth father needs to be involved in the adoption process, which I know he will never agree to. I don't know what to do in regards to exploring the adoption process more as well as the option of keeping my child and ways to protect us from his father. I havent been able to sleep because of this and Im trying to keep calm. Any advice on what to do would be greatly appreciated, I just need some support right now and don't know where to turn. Thank you so much.

[HoustonTexas]

Hey Ashley. I can't imagine what you are going through right now. I wish you all the best!
I am thinking you have to go and talk to someone in your area. Is there a family planning or counseling services available to you where you live?
Many adoption agencies have 1800 numbers with councilors standing by to answer your questions and be of some comfort to you. They won't pressure you and want the best for you and the baby.
I would say to keep your distance from this guy. If he has lied to you, he will continue to. (A Zebra doesn't change it's stripes)
Think of you and the baby and get some counseling right away.
Wishing you all the best.

[usisarah]

You should keep in mind that both parents have to consent to an adoption plan. So putting the baby up for adoption does not keep this child away from his father.

If parenting is what you want to do, you should look into whether or not there are legal things you can do to keep the father away if this is a domestic violence type of issue.

If adoption is what you want to do, you will have to come up with a plan with the father's involvement in most states, especially if he is aware of the pregnancy.

If you terminate your rights and he does not, you could be in a situation where he gets custody of the baby and you have no rights. You should really try to seek counseling on this. Perhaps you can call the local police dept and see if they can refer you to a domestic violence shelter. Not because you need shelter, but because they probably deal with this type of situation and have resources available to you.