[JustPeachy]

Will we have a hard time finding a family who is interested in adopting from us? We're both educated and come from strong families.

You will not have a hard time finding a family interested in adopting. I would guess there are way more families out there than you would imagine who are very much wanting to adopt, especially a healthy infant.

We have been reading about open adoption and we're interested in learning more about that as well, however, we've only got about six weeks left of our pregnancy and we wonder if we've waited to long.

I would start now researching as much as possible about OA, what the laws in your state are, and what type of OA you want (i.e. how much contact you want to have, what level of openness, etc.)

I've considered picking up the Yellow Pages and calling an agency, but I wondered if that was the best option. Is it better to work with an agency that has a stronger web footprint? Do you have to work with an agency at all?

You don't have to use an agency. I did, and was very happy with my experience. You could contact several agencies and interview them and see how the fit is and what they offer.

[lglysson]

Polly,
I really just don't know some of the answers to some of your questions. I went to Crisis Pregnancy Center, maybe you can start there. There are many supportive agency's. If you were in my area (Tucson) I would recommend a certain agency, I don't know if they want me nameing agency's here though. You would not have a hard time finding a couple.
On a personal note, I gave my daughter up for adoption 18 years ago. I have never regreted that decision. I miss her, I had some dark days, still do, but I have never regreted it!! I will be praying for you, I am glad you have a supportive fiance.
Blessings

[PollyPocket]

Thank you all for your responses. We're still committed to making this decision, with the support of our friends and family.

We’re still researching professionals and haven’t found one yet that doesn’t make us feel uncomfortable.

I will stop back by and update as soon as I have more information.

[heart_string]

Polly,

Take the time to fully educate yourself on whatever decision you feel is best.

I have only this advice to offer: GET COUNSELING

Not just before, but after you have made your decision. I recently placed a child - so far, I have no regrets, I do not second-guess my decision, and I am moving forward with my life.

BUT

I was 1,000,000% sure that I entered into an adoptive situation that met MY requirements. I did not choose a family that I 'hoped' would respect my needs, I did not go into a situation that I 'hoped' would work out. I did make sure that I had enough time to really think this whole thing out.

Placing a child, it stays with you forever - just as if you were raising that child.

Make sure that you are 100% ready to deal with that type of situation & with the complications that it can entail. If you have even an inkling of doubt, wait it out, rethink it again.

We are not living in the closed era now, you can have much more of a say than those poor mothers ever dreamed of. It hurts me to my soul to know the pain they suffered.

I currently love my adoptive situation - but, it is not for everyone.

Take your time. Make the decision, question that decision, then question it again.

While placing a child will never be 'a thing of the past' in your life (it will ALWAYS be in your mind), you can make that decision & live your life without regrets.

I wish you all the best, and I wish you peace with your decision, whatever it may be.

[ClevelandSchell]

Hello,

I would like to offer my perspective into the mix. I am an adoptive mom with a completely open adoption. We met his birth mother on the day we brought home our newborn baby boy and now we are 17 years into it. It has been absolutely the best for all of us ... and mostly the best for our child. His birthfamily - including grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins - have been a welcomed extended family in his life. He is SO LOVED.



You have received good advice ... listen to your heart ... and research, research, research.

Linda S

[kamic_77]

Originally Posted by PollyPocket

Hello, I am 7.5 months pregnant and have decided I will give my baby up for adoption with the support of my fiancé.

We've been dating for five years and this is our first pregnancy. Sadly, it couldn't have come at a worse time, as we're both just starting the transition to the working world in May.

While we love this child with all of our hearts, we know we can't provide for her at this time and are interested in finding a home where they will love and cherish her as much as we do.

Will we have a hard time finding a family who is interested in adopting from us? We're both educated and come from strong families.

We have been reading about open adoption and we're interested in learning more about that as well, however, we've only got about six weeks left of our pregnancy and we wonder if we've waited to long.

I've considered picking up the Yellow Pages and calling an agency, but I wondered if that was the best option. Is it better to work with an agency that has a stronger web footprint? Do you have to work with an agency at all?

Any advice you can offer regarding your experience would be helpful. I've done quite a bit of research and I understand the gravity of my decision, however I feel this is the best decision for the three of us at this time.

Thank you in advance for your help.

I would like to just answer the questions you have asked. NO, there is no such thing as waiting to long, there are thousands of amazing families out there that have been waiting for a baby.
As far as an agency, it just depends on what you need from your situation.
My experiences just come from being an adult adoptee, as well as hopeful adopter, so I might not have as much insight to some things, but I do admire you for doing what you think is best.

[seeking_to_adopt]

If you marry him, it is best to keep your baby - things will work out in the end.

Originally Posted by PollyPocket

Hello, I am 7.5 months pregnant and have decided I will give my baby up for adoption with the support of my fiancé.

We've been dating for five years and this is our first pregnancy. Sadly, it couldn't have come at a worse time, as we're both just starting the transition to the working world in May.

While we love this child with all of our hearts, we know we can't provide for her at this time and are interested in finding a home where they will love and cherish her as much as we do.

Will we have a hard time finding a family who is interested in adopting from us? We're both educated and come from strong families.

We have been reading about open adoption and we're interested in learning more about that as well, however, we've only got about six weeks left of our pregnancy and we wonder if we've waited to long.

I've considered picking up the Yellow Pages and calling an agency, but I wondered if that was the best option. Is it better to work with an agency that has a stronger web footprint? Do you have to work with an agency at all?

Any advice you can offer regarding your experience would be helpful. I've done quite a bit of research and I understand the gravity of my decision, however I feel this is the best decision for the three of us at this time.

Thank you in advance for your help.

[PollyPocket]

Thank you everyone for your responses.

I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl almost a month ago and after trying to be a good parents for her, we've decided that it's beyond what we can offer right now.

I feel better having given it a try and I know that I am making the best decision I can for her.

Hopefully, finding her intended parents will be easier than this has been so far.

[bethy724]

Thanks for the update & best wishes for your journey ahead. You are an amazing woman!

[JustPeachy]

I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl almost a month ago and after trying to be a good parents for her, we've decided that it's beyond what we can offer right now.

I feel better having given it a try and I know that I am making the best decision I can for her.

Polly, thanks for the update. It is good that you had the opportunity to take your baby home and give parenting a try. I wish I had that opportunity. I still think I made the right decision for my son, and probably would have come to the same conclusion, but would have felt more secure in the "rightness" of my decision if I could have at least given it a shot.

Congratulations on the birth of your baby girl. And best wishes going forward.

[kamic_77]

I just want to tell you how selfless I think you are. To do what is best for your child, no matter how hard it is, is the true definition of a great parent. I hope you can quickly find a perfect placement for your daughter. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Feel free to PM me or email if you want to chat. (kamic_77@yahoo.com)

[Janeytwo]

Hey Polly!

Thanks so much for keeping us all posted. I respect how hard this has all been for you and wish you and your baby girl the best of everything always.

I hope that you are able to get some counseling for yourself after relinquishment.

This road is hard. Don't do it alone, okay?

((( Polly )))