What was your gut reaction when you found out you were pregnant?

BrandyHagz · #1 04-04-2008, 04:44 PM

Just wondering if some of you 'experienced' ladies out there can share the range of emotions you felt when you first found out you were pregnant - and how those emotions changed over time.

BrandyHagz · #2 04-04-2008, 04:57 PM

I recall being freaked out - having been adopted and having had a bad experience - I didn't first think of adoption...

I'll dive deeper in a bit

Resseda · #3 04-04-2008, 05:03 PM

let's see if I can sum this up. Over the course of my pregnancy, I felt:

terrified-not married, living at home, not enough money, bf didn't want to get married

excited-this is such a blessing, um...right?

scared-what will I do, where will I go, who will I tell, how will the react, how will my bf & his family react, what will people think, what will happen to my job

nervous-is everything alright, did I do anything I shouldn't have before I knew, what does the future hold if I keep him, what does the future hold if I don't

depressed-how could I have been so stupid to get pregnant, I know better than this, my life is over, my relationship is over

overwhelmed-where are the people who are supposed to support me, so many decisions to make & making them on my own, what's happening to me

blessed-when the friends I knew I had really stepped up to the plate to love and support me emotionally.

angry-why am I doing all the research alone, why do I feel like I am going through this whole thing alone
sentimental-I should keep this baby, my dad never had a son, there's no one to carry on my family name, this is the first grandson

Gosh, by the time I had my son, I think I felt every emotion under the sun.

Ress

Oceans · #4 04-04-2008, 05:15 PM

I denied my pregnancy for the first 7 1/2 months - No way could I be pregnant. It was only once and I wasn't even sure if it happened.

When I went to the Dr. for swollen ankles (didn't know why), he told me I was PG... That reaction was stunned FEAR... My parents were going to KILL me.

I was just 17 (16 when conceived)

Then relief when I told my Mom.
Ashamed my Dad wouldn't speak to me (he got over it in about a week)
Numb when my the adoption was set up within 2 weeks.
Relief that I was "going away" so no one would know
Anxious to get it over with once away from home
Missed my family
Curious then bonded with pregnancy
Became sad about adoption
Dreaded birth because of adoption

Then he was born...

The rest is history...

Found at last · #5 04-04-2008, 05:53 PM

For the first six weeks of my pregnancy -Oh my God! I can't be pregnant. That can't be happening to me.

***kakuehl*** · #6 04-04-2008, 07:59 PM

Denial is such a comfortable place to live... I spent months saying to my self "I'll get my period soon."

Fear and anxiety, when Mom figured it out and asked me if I was.

Determination to finish college. (I bought my college class ring in May when I was 4 months pregnant as a promise to myself that I would graduate. i paid my first semester tuition for senior year before I admitted to my parents that I was pregnant.)

Shame...(even though it was the time of the sexual revolution, and I knew many of my classmates were "doing it," I was the one who was VISIBLY pregnant. It's funny, it was an open secret... I was obviously pregnant but no one mentioned it.

Sad... that I couldn't delight in being pregnant. And that I was certain that adoption was the best solution for the baby...

Disappointmeant -- I was disappointed with myself and my inability to maintain my own standards (no sex before marriage)...

That's just a few of the emotions I remember.

paigeturner · #7 04-04-2008, 10:08 PM

I waited for my period forever. I'd just sit there and stare...hoping to see something.

Then I thought about an abortion. And couldn't bring myself to do it.

Then, I told my parents and got bundled away to hide until the birth.

I never allowed myself to think of him as mine. At least that's what I told myself for years. He was mine. For a while.

I did get a chance to say "hello and goodbye" after he was born...

Jackiejdajda · #8 04-05-2008, 05:42 AM

I felt fear.. and I felt that this was one fix I could not get out of..

Reality.. consequences..

Jackie

**thanksgivingmom** · #9 04-05-2008, 07:18 AM

Deny, deny, deny....and then the realization that this was a problem where procrastination (my usual tactic) was the worst possible plan in this particular situation, as there was no way the problem would get smaller (literally and figuratively).

(And I don't mean my DAUGHTER is a problem, but the pregnancy...you guys know what I mean, I just didn't want to end up in some semantics fiasco)

lahdh4 · #10 04-05-2008, 12:11 PM

In shock since I was told since I was 18 that I would have a hard time getting pregnant.

Denial for the 1st few months
Shocked when I finally took the test.

JustPeachy · #11 04-05-2008, 03:28 PM

It was so long ago, it's hard to remember how I felt in the early stages, but I'm sure I was in denial for the month or so after I missed my period. I told my (ex)BF at the time, but don't really remember when or how, but he told his mother before I told mine (I was avoiding telling her as long as possible) and his mom ended up calling my mom and telling her. So when I got home that night, and was greeted with "Peachy, sit down, I need to talk to you" I was filled with dread. My mom asked me point blank if I was pregnant and I said yes. She was upset at first and I think she was yelling at me, but then calmed down. That weekend, we talked about options and I was pretty well set on adoption at that point. So once I registered with the agency and planned for it, my mind was made up. After it was out in the open, I was fine, although it was awkward at work. I hid the pregnancy as long as I could, but then there was no hiding it! So my boss approached me and I told him I was pregnant and I wanted to continue to work up to and after I had the baby (which I did). Outside of being the brunt of office gossip and having some people in my neighborhood and even in my family say hurtful things behind my back (some of which got back to me), I had a good pregnancy. I was never ashamed of it, but it was also a time when the stigma of being single and pregnant was not so bad. There was still gossip, but I always figured the people talking about me just needed to get a life! I held my head high despite some difficult times. I had worse reactions after I gave birth and told people I made an adoption plan. A lot of people were supportive, but a lot were also openly hostile and didn't hesitate to express their (unwanted and un-asked for!) opinions.

Jackiejdajda · #12 04-07-2008, 07:27 AM

JustPeachy

Quote:

A lot of people were supportive, but a lot were also openly hostile and didn't hesitate to express their (unwanted and un-asked for!) opinions.

For something as sensitive as giving a baby up for adoption you would think people would keep their mouths shut and their support at the maxium..
How can we make a decision on our own when others decide that what they think is best..

This is one of my places of upset..

Jackie

BrandyHagz · #13 04-09-2008, 07:12 AM

Thanks everyone for sharing

I am still working thru some emotional issues...most of the first five months I was like you guys...I knew my period was right around the corner. It wasn't until i felt her kick that reality set in...

Free_to_be_me · #14 04-09-2008, 10:31 AM

I think the first weeks of my pregnancy were the weeks that I prayed more than any time in my life..."Please don't let me be pregnant, please don't let me be pregnant. Please let me have my period. Please..." I remember the week I was supposed to get it I went to the bathroom so many times that my coworkers were asking if I was sick...I was terrified.

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