[crazeeightsintrouble]

i dont know what to do i found out i was pregnant and when i told my boyfriend he left me. i just started college and this is going to ruin my life. i cant be a mom. i am not ready. what do i do? i want to give this baby away to someone who can give it what it needs. do i just tell them at the hospital? i really need your help!!!!!!!

[taramayrn]

Hi,
(((HUGS))) If you are considering adoption, even if you aren't, I would suggest you find some non biased, independant counselling that can help you explore your options - parenting, adoption, etc. If after that you feel adoption is your best option I would encourage you to contact an agency in your area - that way you can pick the parents of your child and you can be involved in the process as much as you like.

I need to tell you that it is not okay for potential adoptive parents to contact you in hopes of adopting your baby. If you receive any emails or pm's of this nature please forward them to either myself, SchmennaLeigh, Crick, MicheleB, BrandyHagz, Tigger27 or any other CM (if I've forgotten any).

[banjo]

i was once in your shoes. with hindsight i would have kept my child and put my studies on hold for perhaps the first year then juggled parenting with studies etc. I know that you are not ready. I can tell you know that even when you think you are ready it's a shock but a great privilege to be a parent.

Even though I'm part of an open adoption My teenaged bdaughter doesn't want anything to do with me and her extended bfamily. So my only advice is to parent. Please give it a shot even for six months and then if you still believe adoption is right for you and your child then I know there will be a wonderful couple waiting to adopt your child. adoption is forever, whereas what you are going through right now is just temporary. Next week the most amazing guy could walk into your life and want a long term relationship with you and your child. Remember if your baby could talk he/she would just want you to be her mom and never let her go to live with strangers. best of luck

[EmmaLeigh2882]

I will be keeping you in my prayers, this is a difficult time. Please take your time and pray, think and study your options.

[crazeeightsintrouble]

who do i call i dont know where i find information someone please tell me what i do first. how do i find counselors? how do i find someone to take it?

[taramayrn]

When you say take "it" do you mean your baby? I would encourage you, as from what you've said you are interested in adoption, to possibly look in the yellow pages under "adoption" to find agencies. I would encourage you to interview each one before you begin working with them.

[LegalEagleMom]

Look on this site and in the phone book under adoption.

[taramayrn]

How far along are you? Does your family know that you are pregnant? Do you have a health center at your college you can go to?

[crazeeightsintrouble]

i dont know how far along i am i missed my period last month but didnt think anything of it because i miss it alot. i missed it this month and got more concerned. no one but my boyfriend who left me knows im pregnant and im not telling anyone because i dont plan to keep it and yes i mean the baby. we have a clinic here but they dont help people who are pregnant i dont think

[SchmennaLeigh]

Your first step needs to be in the direction of medical care. You said you were in college. Make your way to the college health clinic. They'll be best able to guide you to an OBGYN that will fit either with your current medical insurance if you have it or set you up with local assistance available to you. Prenatal care is necessary not only for the baby's health but to watch over your health during pregnancy as well.

Best of luck.

[ATDx2006]

Some men are immature. They want to have sex, but when it comes down to the consiquences, they don't want responsibility. I'm sorry, hun. Firstly, you HAVE to get pre-natal care. If you're in college they should have a clinic or a lot of colleges have insurance for you. I'm not sure if yours does. And I'm not sure if they cover pregnancy costs either...you're going to have to look into that.

Adoption is a BIG decision and not something to be made lightly. It took me a long time to decide whether or not I actually wanted to make that choice, or not. It's something you probably would change your mind about a few times before making your final decision. Do whatever is best for you and your baby. Really think about it...don't just make any decision in the world...

Good luck.

[kdetanner]

You sound like you are all worked up about this. Everyone here is VERY right that you need to calm down and think about your options! Adoption is a very seriouse thing and it is important to find the right people to do such a thing. If not you could hurt a good family, your child, and yourself! You cant change your mind. I understand where you are coming from I promise. I am a young mother myself. I had my son when I was 16 and 5 months later I had twin girls! It was very scary in the beginning but you wouldnt believe how much you could love someone that you havnt even met yet! When my kids were born it totally opened my eyes! I am a full time mother now, I have a good job, and I am a college student with all of my schooling paid for! Yes mam it is all paid for, because I am a mom! I think you should talk to your parents too... they might be more supportive than you think and they are parents themselves! My friend was 17 when she found out she was pregnant and she flipped out! She did not tell her mother... her mother knew when she started showing "obviously" and sat her daughter down and spent the whole day with her talking about what they wanted to do. Her mother knew how scared she was and they TOGEATHER decided to keep the child. My friend is now a GREAT mommy, an R.N., lives in an awesome house, drives an awesome car, her daughter is in modeling (for kids) AND she is about to be married to the SWEETEST MAN ALIVE! He also loves that her daughter like his own! My friend just turned 24 and has it MADE! You never know what could happen! I will pray for you!

[SchmennaLeigh]

Originally Posted by kdetanner

Adoption is a very seriouse thing and it is important to find the right people to do such a thing. If not you could hurt a good family, your child, and yourself! You cant change your mind.

Actually, an expectant Mother has every right under the sun to make the decision to parent her child. Simply investigating adoption isn't a signed, sealed and delivered contract for life. Until the TPR is signed, the child is hers and the decisions are hers.

[Mom2Max]

When I was in college ( not too long ago) I had no idea that there where obgyn clinics for female students. These clinics are usually free or really cheap if you are going to school full time. When I found out about the clinic I went in to discuss Birth Control and they were very helpful. I would call the information line of your college and they might be able to direct you to the health clinic. I hope this was helpful.

[crazeeightsintrouble]

i wanted to come back and tell everyone thank you

I am still pregnant and i have talked to a agency who said they had a lot of people who would take it when its born no questions asked whivh is what i want