[Ca Birthmom]

Hi-
Well like many single moms on this board, I am now pregnant with my 4th child and it will be my 3rd son.I can not afford another child and I am now almost 6 months pregnant.I am so stressed out and confused.The birth father and I have 1 son together and now he doesn't want anything to do with any of us.He is older and married and his wife knows nothing about this secret affair we had for the past 4 years.He will not financially support me,so I am stuck.I never knew where he lived and he changed his cell number.I don't know what to do.
I have contacted a couple adoption agencies and they said that they need his signature- How can I get that.I know absolutely no info on him.Any advice?

[bumblebeeskies]

Hi, I have some ideas for you. Please feel free to send me a private message.

Jen

[michellemartin]

I'm a bit suprised you have no info on him with already having a child with this man.

If this story is legit, you might be able to get the phone company of his former phone number to give you a name. You just have to talk to someone new . Either that, or maybe a lawyer associated with the agency would be able to contact the phone company, get the name with a confidentiality agreement -meaning you dont get his name, just the agency- so they can contact him about his child. The other option is to contact a child support agency in your area and see if there is any way to track him down since if you dont know his name, he is probably not paying you support. And if he is paying support then maybe you wont be in this place of feeling like you have to place your current son for adoption. I would think a government agency like the child support division would be able to get his name from a phone number.

[mommieof2cuties]

You say that you already have a son with him, if you have not placed this son for adoption I would contact your state to get him to pay child support. Your son is entitled to this support and even if you don't want it, his father in the picture or not needs to pay for this child. With a second son coming from same father, he will owe you even more money and again it is for the children and he must pay it. Do worry about his life being ruinned if you still have feelings for him, it takes two people to make a baby and he understood what he was doing. His wife needs to be informed also, as if he has kids and you have kids together your kids could have half siblings and siblings should be able to have contact or at least information about one another. Also I think since you cannot get his information, that you can take an ad out in the newspaper time varys by state to terminate his rights. I am sorry that your in this postion but again your son that is here already is entitled to child support from his father! I hope everything works out for you and your family.

Summer

[restalyne]

I agree with you....totally and completely...why should this man be allowed to walk away? You are entitled to finanacial support from him..and I feel really sorry that his wife has to find out...but this is a child we are talking about...

[mommieof2cuties]

Was wondering why we have not gotten an update?

Hope all is well,

God Bless,
Summer