[pebbz]

wow what intelligent teens we have these days! i think it's wonderful that this 15 year old was so moved by this video!

our kids should be educated about rape and the post-stress involved. our kids should know that there are options out there and they should be able to form their own opinions. i think it's wonderful to show a video like this one being discussed. it shows that there is an option involving life! maybe not always be seen as something positive coming from a rape but deffinately something meaningful and kind.
i was sexually assaulted while i was at work and mentally blacked out for several minutes...i dont know what happened in those minutes i may never be able to recall, i was practically naked and felt horribly dirty and so full of shame....but i didnt get pregnant. if i had i would have never murdered an innocent human. i know this will stir up alot of crap by saying that (and boy do i ever love to express my opinions lol), but this is just my thoughts on the issue. when someone is sexually assaulted or raped there is alot of trauma involved. it can be very trying for the next year (and more! i am still dealing w/ it 2 years later) and if that person is pregnant it can be even worse. just because you were hurt doesnt mean you have to carry on the pattern of hurt and kill a baby. carry the baby through and if you cannot love that child and nuture that child after birth there are many families who will and can. no, i am not trying to say "give me your baby, i can love him/her when you can't" (besides, we are interested in adopting special needs /older kids/siblings). we did talk about what happened when i was assaulted and why i couldnt remember those several elusive moments. we talked about what we would do if i was pregnant. we had already decided to adopt and we were really torn about this assault and what it would mean if i were pg. it would mean carrying a baby for 9 months...it would mean putting our adoption on hold and giving that baby up for adoption ...because...honestly....i dont think i couldve looked at that child every day and loved him or her like i shouldve. i hate the person who hurt me. i live about 20 minutes from him and it scares me every time i go to that side of town. i am afraid i will see him when i am driving down the road or going to the store. i am afraid of being alone while i am out in case i should run across him....but i have NEVER been afraid that i wouldve killed that innocent child. i know where i stand on that issue and thank God i have run out of things to say!!!! lol...have fun reading this one people! sorry it's so long...sometimes i just have to talk about what happened to me. i feel better now anyway...

marian

[Jackiejdajda]

pebbz wrote..sometimes i just have to talk about what happened to me.

I hear you..

Was the man arrested?

What a horrible thing to go through..


Jackie

[qpelf]

Jennie,

I didn't hear judgement in your voice. I heard a very wise 15 year old share her views with us. I didn't hear judgement, I heard you simply give us all something to think about. God gives us all the freedom to chose the paths our lives are to travel. And each decision is carries with it a new path to be traveled. So Jennie, don't be discouraged by those that were so quick to cut you down. I am not even going to go to the anti or pro abortion issue here. I am just proud that a 15 year old girl has the courage to stand up for her convictions no matter which way they go. Keep your own head and your own ideas and realize that you don't have to conform to a crowd ever because it's popular. And I mean that no matter which way you had voiced your thoughts. Continue to be able to have that independant thinking.

Pam

[qpelf]

Jennie,

I didn't hear judgement in your voice. I heard a very wise 15 year old share her views with us. I didn't hear judgement, I heard you simply give us all something to think about. God gives us all the freedom to chose the paths our lives are to travel. And each decision is carries with it a new path to be traveled. So Jennie, don't be discouraged by those that were so quick to cut you down. I am not even going to go to the anti or pro abortion issue here. I am just proud that a 15 year old girl has the courage to stand up for her convictions no matter which way they go. Keep your own head and your own ideas and realize that you don't have to conform to a crowd ever because it's popular. And I mean that no matter which way you had voiced your thoughts. Continue to be able to have that independant thinking.

Pam

[pebbz]

yes he was arrested. that made me really afraid. he has alot of money...i mean ALOT. i thought for sure he would come after me when he got out. of course he only spent a night and a day in jail but ended up spending a fortune to his lawyer...justice was served there anyway lol. we went to court and the jury had to find him guilty on six points. they found him guilty on five. because of my black out he got off. i wracked my brain for days trying to trigger a memory and came up w/ nothing. so, he didnt end up serving any time....which is funny because when the jury went to deliberate his attorney came over to speak to the DA while i was sitting there and asked what he would recommend as a sentence! they both thought he was going down! but, he ended up paying a fortune for that attorney and that is justice enough for me. i still have issues w/ the whole black out thing...i am sure to always have that weighing over me. he knows i cant remember and he sat there in that chair and smiled everytime it was brought up. i dont know what happened but i do know a little about what a rape victim must feel. i didnt want anyone to know...i didnt want to call the cops...i didnt want to go to court or tell my story...i didnt want to be judged. i just wanted to drop it there and forget about it. get on w/ my life. but i knew i couldnt w/out closure. i knew i would see it through. and i am so happy that i did. if only i could get over that creepy feeling that he knows where i am and he knows every move i make. i would gladly go through it again to protect my daughter....just tryin to stay safe ya know. pray for me....if youre the prayin sort. thank you all for being understanding.

marian

[lilifelover]

Thank you for your post.
I believe that abortion is never okay, that we do not have the "choice" to take an innocent life.

In the case of rape (according to scources less than 1% of abortions are attributed to rape/incest) the woman isn't choosing to have sex, but it happens and that becomes her reality. A woman can love a baby that is conceived in any way. A mother can love a child that grows inside of her no matter how that child came to be with her because he or she is a part of her!

If the mother isn't ready to parent, or cannot for whatever reason, she can choose adoption. I personally chose an open adoption for my daughter because I wanted to be there with her as she grew up, even though I wasn't expecting her and didn't necessiarly like the way that she came to be with me. I am going to be there for her, be her link to her heritage and venture into the future with her!

I have spent a good portion of the last 16 months researching the effects of abortion, the different types and procedures involved in abortion and just about everything involved in abortion. I have also researched everything I can find about adoption and parenting. Based on my research and my moral beliefs I have concluded that abortion for whatever reason is wrong and there are different ways to avoid parenting or giving your children a better life.

PM me if you'd like to speak further.
I hope that anyone who finds themselves pregnant with an unplanned pregnancy will choose to carry that child to term and give him or her the life that they have a right to and deserve.

I was a pregnant teenager working two jobs and going to school full-time. It CAN be done, if I can do it anyone can. And I wouldn't trade one second of it for anything-the result was my daughter-the most beautiful and perfect girl in the world.

[mj77]

kburch, you took the words right out of my mouth. Anna, I always love to read your insights. I think it is great this girl is forming her own opinion. Too often I remember in school everyone going along with what the popular thing was to believe. I was open about my opinions toward people when I was younger and because I didn't agree with many things others did, I got critisized. I too think it is great that a school is showing a senerio where a woman didn't abort. And what a difficult situation. I know 2 women who chose to keep their babies after being raped. Both girls who were born are surrounded by people who love them greatly. I would imagine these moms are very happy with the choice they made to keep their daughters. Don't get me wrong though, I AM pro-life but I think the decission a woman makes is between her and God Almighty, not for me to judge her.

Melissa

[Iyoba]

I admire you, jmgirl

[tearsofblood187]

i think it is good that you have an opinion on this matter........you sound very strong about it. however, you have never been in a situation to make that choice........so if you did get pregnant now your opinion might change as fast as you made it. i no from my experience that you can only have a true opinon on this subject if you have been there........maybe if you were in the situation of being pregnant you would understand more about peoples choices of making this hard decision

[lilifelover]

perhaps, but someone who is well grounded will have that foundation to lean on when a hard time might come along, like that one. Plus, because you happen to be in the situation doesn't mean that the decision you might make contrary to those original beliefs is more right....in fact, it is just the opposite!

I've known a lot of women who have been there and stood by their beliefs, even when life wasn't fair...and they're blessed today because of it! It can be done.

[tearsofblood187]

abortion isnt right or wrong,
it is a chioce
it is a right
it is a chance for a female to correct their mistake in a different way then choosing adoption or to parent.

[lilifelover]

if by "correct a mistake" you mean "kill a baby" then yes, that is what it is.

By making that mistake that girl has chosen to take the risk of getting pregnant. Conception equals the start of life. Legally she does have that choice to kill the baby...but let's hope that she doesn't, and she chooses to let that baby have a life that he or she deserves.

You claim women's rights? What about the unborn female?

Everyone will ultimately reach their own conclusion. But I don't think punishing an innocent child should be the "correction of a mistake." Let's not make 2 victims out of it (in the case of rape)...I vote for zero victims-and for a chance at life!

[tearsofblood187]

if by "correct a mistake" you mean "kill a baby"

technicaly it is not a baby, just a fetus nothin mmore.

But I don't think punishing an innocent child should be the "correction of a mistake."
a child cannot live in your belly, a litttle fetus can. you are not punishing a child. and sometimes to get an abortion the baby might not even be a mistake. there could be medical problems or just other resons to get an abortion.

[mj77]

Tearsofblood187, I think you should check out the abortion debate forum if you want to start up a hot topic you obviously feel passionate about. I know women who have been raped and have kept thier babies and they are huge blessings in their lives. Their children are NOT being punished because they are alive. These children are beautiful people who came out of a tragic situation.

[lilifelover]

I think so too!

Also, while you are on the topic, go to a few different sites and find out what abortion really is. Most people with an opinion don't really know. Once you see what happens to these children you might change your mind! It's easy to have an uninformed opinion about an ambiguous idea...but when you really put some thought and research in it-well, that's a whole different ballgame.