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Originally Posted By kristi

I am pregnant and planning on placing. My boyfriend and I were planning on getting married and when he found out I was pregnant he completely deserted me. I have not heard from him for six months, but I know that he found a new girlfriend within weeks of our breakup. I am in the dilemma of whether or not I should tell his parents. I know that there is animosity between them and him and he does not keep regular contact with them. He has another daughter who lives parttime with her bmom and part-time with his parents (grandparents). He is never around and never takes care of his little girl. That is one reason why I have decided on adoption so my little girl can have a full-time daddy.
Now do his parents have the right to know? Should they know that they have another grandchild brought into this world by their unmarried son? I want them to know more for the sake of this baby, so she can trace her heritage when the time comes and know and love both sides of her family. I just don't want to get into a battle over this child, I want her life to be as easy as possible and I wont change my mind. Do you think his parents will come viscously after me demanding their grandchild, or will they support me in this decision to give her a complete healthy home? I'm really torn, please help me...

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Originally Posted By a bud

Hi Kristi,

I know this is hard on you, but tell them for all of the right reasons, and it will be a good thing for you. Explain to them what you are doing and why. They have no legal rights toward the child. They can try to gain influence through their son, but that sounds futile. Good luck to you.

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Originally Posted By Devon

I think you should tell them. I mean, yeah the daddy left, but his parents should know if they have another grandchild, who knows maybe they will want to adopt. As for this guy, he is no good if he up and left you after he found out you were pregnant. That is no man at all. I'm 17 and 3 months pregnant, I am engaged and the baby's daddy is here and loves me and the baby dearly, now that's a man. I really do think you should tell them, it is a really good idea.

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Originally Posted By birthmom Jamie

I did not tell my bsons parents.I was afraid that they would take the baby & I may not see him again or tell me not to place my child.I distanced myself from the bfather because of this.It was more important for my bson to have a loving adad than to feel abandand by his bfather wichI know is what would have happened .We are in a semi-open triad with visitation.If the bdad wants to write our son he can.So can his parents but I don't know if he told them about our son yet.