[oceanica]

Check out this link
The Human Condition : Zahara Jolie-Pitt and the Politics of Uncombed Hair

This makes me a little scared... I don't think the hair looks THAT bad. I better work harder on my daughter! (Fortunately whenever she goes out her hair is "done" in puffs at least. AND 4 is a lot older than 15 months.)
Do you think media/black community is being a little hard on her? What are your thoughts?

[sugarandspice697]

I dislike it when the media does this to families - regardless of their race. Yes, Zahara's hair is a little "rough" but their are a few times when Firefly's hair is extremely greasy. Plus, there are days when my hair isn't exactly what you would see on Essence Magazine. Its not that I don't respect her or my culture, I just didn't have time that particualar day to do hair.

If your worried about Athena's hair, just make sure is moisturized and put into puff/braids whenever you go out. Afros are okay for young children too - just make sure its combed. People of all races and ethnicities need their hair combed everyday and AAs are no exception to that rule (unless their hair is in braids of course).

[bethy724]

I think the media needs to lay of - I wonder if the writer has gone to the orphanage Zarhara came from to see the children's hair. Mads hair looks horrible 1/2 the time - I wonder why that wasn't mentioned. The article certainly won't help Z feel great about her mom or hair.

[ocracoke]

Personally I like the free wild crazy hair. I braid because she likes beads, her hair tangles easily, and she she hates being called mushroom head.

Samantha

[Ladyofmoonlight]

Originally Posted by bethy724

I wonder if the writer has gone to the orphanage Zarhara came from to see the children's hair.

Just had to mention, we adopted our son from the same agency they used and he was in the same orphanage. So I can personally attest that most of the hair there, for girls, is either cut reeeeally short or put into a few little braids or ponytails. Nothing too ornate, but nothing unkempt either

I personally think we shouldn't judge them. How do we know how Z likes her hair? Maybe this is just her personal preference and they've decided to let her be who she wants to be and not force an image on her. Unless they say, we won't know for sure.

[nickchris]

Your child is a baby, loose hair is preferred because I know a lot of people who do not believe in placing a lot of hair bobs in a young baby's hair. Zahara is an older child.

Personally, I think Angie can do a bit better with Zahara hair. Could be the bohemian thing going on, but in general, in my circle, and my mother, grandmothers, family in general and so on etc; the hair is well groomed. The child's hair looks like a nest at times. At other times it looks like a loose, unformed afro, not too bad. I am sure there are Black moms who have kids with messy hair, but we know how it's easy to be judged in a negative manner regardless of how we are dressed. Call that view whatever, but that's how it is.
I just sat down 4 hours ago to moisturize (it got dry this week-end, and dh combed her hair earlier. lol) and put sleep braids in DD's hair for the morning combing session, if I can do that so can anyone else.
Unless Dh is in charge of her morning regime, (and I am not around) DD starts the day off with decently coiffed hair.. later on is another story. lol

In addition, I have children of different/combined races in my family via adoption,and bio, with straight, or wavy type hair. All of the kids starts off the day with clean, well groomed hair etc;

For all of the negativity with Madonna, seems the article gave her props for keeping her DD's hair braided and well groomed.



As this excerpt from the above OP's link says:

For the record, Jolie’ daughter Shiloh isn’t exactly looking like much time is being given to her hair either. But she isn’t a little black girl being judged by mainstream standards.

[joskimo]

hair, hair, hair. I hadn't been following this hullabalou but I've always paid attention to Z because she's not much older then my daughter. Well we all have off days, and man there are times I hate bringing H to the store when her hair is off All I have to judge recently is the photo in the article and it didn't look that bad. I know that when I choose to adopt AA I put a lot of thought into the hair and accepted the responsibility, that priorities to her culture are my priorities. Her hair doesn't always rock but I always put a lot of effort into it and we have more good days then bad. I would expect the same of Angie, but honestly I don't have 6 kids either.

[musemoon]

Kids are kids, their hair gets messy. Black, white or whatever...I wish people would find a hobby more fulfilling than tearing someone else down...really!

[OakShannon]

Okay, I admit. I'm guilty of having thought that before. Not that I spend a lot of time on it. But I've noticed that her hair looks pretty wild in most of her pictures and wondered why they don't do something with it. Although the picture for this article actually doesn't look as bad.

I used to have David's hair cut so that it was a little longer on the top than the back and sides. It was really cute. And then I would have it cut every 4 weeks or so. I always conditioned and styled it before we went out. It looked fine to me. Then my friend started commenting. Where do you get his hair cut? I always clip C's (his son's) hair. Do you want me to do David's? FINALLY I got his very gentle hint. Now I get David's hair cut every two weeks and it's kept very neat. I'm happy he cared enough to persist until I got what he was telling me.

Our families are more visible than other families. And their family is about the most visible one in the world! People do notice and make judgements, whether they tell us what they are thinking or not. For good or for bad, hair is one outward sign people use to determine if our kids are well loved and cared for. So yeah, there is some pressure to do it right. I think we can say, "Well, I don't care what other people think." But while I think that can be a very healthy attitude in some situations, I'm less comfortable when the one they are looking at is the child. I know they've got 6 kids, but if anyone could afford to have someone come in and help, they could!

[nickchris]

No this is not a bad pic of Zahara's hair.

No one is saying that a child's hair has to be perfect all day. However wild hair is wild hair. When I pick DD up later today from school, I know that her hair will look as if she was doing kid stuff.. no biggie. But she starts off the day with well groomed hair, just as her bath and lotion this morning. It's all a part of her day, and she is used to that. If we go out later on after her nap, I will brush the sides of her hair, or redo it if she played in her hair. It is also a great bonding tool, especially for an adopted child.
I would not have a CC child going around with greasy, tangled hair would I, or would you ? Well same difference with a child of curly/frizzy/kinky hair. How many products are out there for women with curly hair? de-frizzer, de-tangler and so on.

Good points OakShannon.

The cultural aspect of hair and grooming is also there in Africa, the islands, the US etc;
Later on in school other kids will comment, and why place ones child up for issues. This is not about the parent and whats the big deal. Yet the point of the article (which imo is not as judgmental as some others that I have read) is there should be a sensitivity, especially in a tra situation.

[ocracoke]

Okay question... I do my daughter's hair. I braid and twist and condition. I feel like I take a lot of care to make sure it is in good condition. Her hair is fairly long right now. I leave in a style about 2-3 weeks depending on the style and shape. But after 3-4 days the girl has fuzzies. Is it bad etiquette to let her out in public with fuzzies? How do you deal with fuzzies without taking the braids out and re-doing? Most of her styles take 1.5-4 hours to do and I am not all that interested (and neither is she) in doing that amount of hair every 3-4 days. And she hates puffs so that is not an option -- wish it was.

Samantha

[nickchris]

Are you speaking of cornrow/braids, or regular box braids? If its regular box braids, then I would re do them. Depending on the length of her hair, you can do simple twists styles in-between the detailed braids. DDs hair is now just long enough that I can do 4 twists or 3 box twists styles, maybe do 4 to 5 braids at the nape of her neck. If its really long, you can do 3 to 4 twists and do a knot and tuck... similar to the little girl's hair styles in the new Eddie Murphy movie, Imagine That.
Unless one of my younger sisters pitch in, I do not do cornrow/braids (never learned how to do that lol) I am thinking a light mist type moisturizer, and a soft brush for the fuzzies. However, I think if you check with a salon etc, they may give you tips, on how to get rid of fuzzies w/o messing up the braids. . You should find many in Durham or Raleigh if you are near the rtp.
DDs hair is not as long yet, and not all one length, so stick with simple styles. I use a brush, and the olive oil/h2o spritz, and brush DDs hair to get her fuzzies out. It usually get that way, of the hair gets dry, and more than likely its time to wash it anyway.
And really DD (she is 4) did not like getting her hair brushed.combed, especially the back..but got used to it.

My boys hate the barbershop, they did not get used to it, lack of exposure. This is because their dad cut their hair 70% of the time as younger preschooler boys. Now the barber shop with their sharper clippers is torture.

All I can say is the hair combing is doable, and it gets better as the child gets older. :-)

[nickchris]

One more thing, got to run. I am talking in general here My wild term was not implying that your kids have wild or unhealthy hair, I am discussing the article.
Also I mentioned this before, how my baby niece who is now right under 2 is something else. lol Anyway, she has tons of curly hair, similar to little ds. Its nice, and rich looking. When stretched out its past her shoulders.
Her mom will sometimes bring her over with half of her hair done. My sister works, so it does get hard when a toddler fights with the grooming.
Like DD we go yea!! and make them feel good. the smile after all is said and done is too cute.
So don't think because I am a Black mom that I do not see the challenges. Especially if one is not used to the extra time in hair care.
However, based on the outcome, its worth it in the long run.

Got to get DD.. maybe I will post a pic of her hair after a day in school. lol

[ocracoke]

Oh I didn't take anything personally -- it just made me think. So I asked the question.

I guess, for me, part of the problem is that she likes beads. Lots and lots of beads. I try cutting back on them (because almost none of her friends wear them now) but she insists. I do hanging twists, box braids, and corn rows. And there are a lot on her head since each has to be small enough to get those pony beads on them. And I am one of those working moms so braiding weekend means taking the hair out on Friday, starting the braiding on Saturday morning (before gymnastics), doing more on Saturday night (during movie night), and finishing on Sunday (will need to finish on Saturday now since she has decided to attend church). Her hair is long -- when braided out it is just down past her shoulder blades. I want to cut it shorter but she screams that she is not a boy so she needs long hair. And after getting home at 6pm and feeding her dinner, the last thing I want to do it start braiding. So she goes fuzzy. And when it gets too fuzzy I start all over. Luckily she doesn't understand "bad hair days" yet. Or maybe she is just use to it since I have those a lot. LOL

Samantha

[Sleeplvr]

Nope... the black community is not being too hard on her... she's getting the same level of grief that black folks give each other about hair. By adopting a black child she signed up for everything that comes along with it. Yes, there is a learning curve if you are not used to styling black hair but it's better to jump in early rather than wait until the child notices that her hair isn't groomed like the other kids. At 4 years old my DD is very particular when it comes to her hair and clothing. If it doesn't meet her approval she's got something to say.

My mom touched my head twice a day. She styled my hair each morning and at bedtime she did sleep braids.
I don't do my DD's hair twice a day because I work. I try to style it everyday but it really depends on if a style can hold up a second day or not. We wash it once or twice a week depending on how dirty it gets.

Little girls should look like little girls... Old school rules say that little girls shouldn't wear their hair loose because it makes them look older than their age. At least slap a bow on it if it's too short for braids, twists or puffs. My DD looks much older when her hair is loose. I flat ironed it on the weekend and she did not look like a 4 year old with it down and loose. So up it went and when I wasn't looking she took the braids out.

Angelina always looks put together when she leaves the house so why can't she do the same for Zahara... Here's what my mom always said to me... If it came down to the mom looking put together versus the child... the child should be the one you focus on. My mom hated seeing women looking like they stepped out of a magazine and the kids looking like raggamuffins. Angelina has the time and money to make sure everyone looks good when they leave the house.

What is going on with Angelina's son Maddox in that photo? Who bleached his hair blonde? Did they bleach it to match Brad's hair? That is a bigger issue than Zahara's hair IMO. I'm not a fan of dyeing or bleaching a child's hair anyway but doing that in a transracial adoption they are asking for identity issues.