[yehudit]

Hello wise parents,

My adorable sweet darling daughter is 5 months. She is the most wonderful thing I can imagine and she has all of us wrapped around her little finger. She is Biracial -- we know she is 1/2 CC, only we don't know what the other half is. When she was placed with us we were told there are 3 possible birth fathers: one is CC, one is AA, and one is Hispanic/Cuban.

Like I said, it doesn't matter to us in terms of how much we adore her, but I wonder if it might matter to her one day. About 70% of people think she looks Hispanic, including all the central and south americans we know. We've ruled out CC because she is very dark -- darker even than my very swarthy husband who could pass for BR himself -- and her Bmom is blond and fair. But given the variation among both populations I'm wondering if we'd be able to tell by now? Her hair is still very fine and might become curly or straight.

So my questions are
1. When should we be able to tell what her racial makeup is? Will we ever?
2. How do we help DD deal with not knowing even the most basic things about her Bdad?
3. Why does it matter?

If someone can tell me how to post images I can add a picture of her.

As I said, it doesn't really matter, but...

Thanks,

[tweetybirdus]

there is dna testing that you could have done to tell what her genetic heritage is.

[OakShannon]

"It doesn't matter but . . ." we live in a very race conscious society and people are always asking those who are not clearly one thing or another, "What are you?" So it does matter. I have to think it will matter to her someday. It is a huge thing to not know about yourself.

We are also in a situation where my child's birthfather is unknown. His mom is biracial. When he was your daughter's age, I also worried that his racial identity would be unclear and we wouldn't be able to fill in that gap for him. But my son is very clearly African American. And so even though, like you, it made no difference in terms of how I felt about my son, I am happy for him that he won't have to face questions that he doesn't have an answer to.

I wonder what others think. There are genetic tests you can take that identify what parts of the world your ancestors come from. It could answer that question for your daughter if she ever wants to know.

[loveajax]

I agree with Oak that she definitely will want to know (this is something my husband said he already "yearned" to know...even though he is white, he wanted to know his nationalities, etc.).

I think Sleeplvr has done this testing or at least posted some details about how to do it....hopefully, she will see this.

I am curious about how "detailed" the tests are. For example, I don't think that "Hispanic" is considered a separate race. So I wonder if the test could identify that specifically (or just rule out African ancestry?)....just curious. Anyway, if it's not waaaay expensive, I think I would do it at some point. GL to you!! And congrats on your beautiful girl!

[EZ2Luv]

Yes there is a DNA test that could tell you id she is in fact AA or Hispanic. The tests have come a long wayand have become pretty specific.
I think it would be very important for her to know. I am from the closed era and still do not know anything about my bdad except he was CC. To me it really doesn't matter at this point who he was/is, but I think for a mixed ethinticity I would want to know.
As an adoptee from the closed era everything was so limited as far as bio information, but these days it is so much more open that if therer is a way to find out it should be done.
Also, you would want to know for certain illnesses that are more prevalant in certain ethniticties it is part of medical history.
I realise to others that love their adoped family members it really doesn't matter, but this is part of the adoptee and she does have a right to know.

EZ

[Cjmeck]

We had a similiar situation with my dd and 2 possible bfathers. Bmom was CC and the bfathers were either CC or AA. For her, it became apparent by about 3 months of age. But I can see why you are unsure since many AA/CC babies do appear hispanic--many thought my DD was hispanic. I agree with the others--it DOES matter. That is 1/2 of her genetic identity and I cannot imagine what it would be like growing up not knowing. I am CC--but I'm also part Native American. And I've had people sometimes ask me about my heritage. I wonder about the genetic testing thing others are recommending. Seems like a good choice. But I should tell you, that as my daughter has gotten older--she's
14m--more of her AA features are coming out (besides her skin and hair).

[guatparents2be]

i also think it may matter for several reasons, all posted above.

that said, i'm not 100%sure of the details on this, but from what i understand, the DNA testing for lineage (such as the national geographic genographic project) can't get paternal information because it is passed down on the y chromosome and girls don't carry it.

anyone?

[millie58]

I think for specific genetic details, it has to go from son to father. I think to determine her race, a DNA test can be done. That being said, I was told that there is no DNA marker for Native American. Does anyone know if this is true?

Originally Posted by guatparents2be

i also think it may matter for several reasons, all posted above.

that said, i'm not 100%sure of the details on this, but from what i understand, the DNA testing for lineage (such as the national geographic genographic project) can't get paternal information because it is passed down on the y chromosome and girls don't carry it.

anyone?

[BethanyB]

I know there is genetic testing but I don't know how exact it is.

As far as being able to tell by looking at your child, that will probably be impossible. I have seen biracial and AA children who look Hispanic. And since she is biracial, that makes it tough.

A lot of people asked me what my kids were when they were little. They are AA (their mom is AA) but they were very light at birth. The SW's thought they were biracial. Now my son has gotten darker and even so, there are light skinned AA's and dark skinned AA's.

It's hard when the father is unknown because you won't have answers for your daughter when she asks. I'm going through that now with my kids.

As for what you would say if people ask what she is, I would just say biracial.

[Sleeplvr]

I just saw this post.

I've done DNA testing on myself and my DD. A DNA test may or may not tell you whether the father is African or Hispanic/Latino because Latino's from certain countries may have African ancestry. If the father is from Cuba, Puerto Rico or any number of countries there may be some African ancestry because of the slave trade.

Latino's typically end up with a test that reads as Native & European or NA, African and European.
The average AA in this country is biracial or multiracial genetically. So with the combination of races you may have to make an educated guess on the father.

My Ancestry by DNA test came back as 70% African, 20% Native American and 10% European if I'm remembering it correctly. I was surprised by the high percentage of NA. My DD's test came back as African, Asian and European as expected. You can test for NA ancestry but it will not tell you the tribe.

The test results are a best guess. The more you are racially mixed the less static the results are. When you are mixed race you will be given ranges for each race... For example my African heritage was pretty much on the high end in the range that I was given but could be much lower... my NA ancestry results settled into the mid range but could be as high as 30%. My European ancestry had the tightest rage with not much more higher or lower in the range given. If you are only one race it is an extremely accurate test.

It's a pretty good test to get some questions answered and will probably lead to a whole new set of questions.

[Casey677]

I don't know for sure about my second dd either. She is now a little over two. Her bmom is CC and her bfather could be any number of men. At first we were told that they were all AA and then told that they were all at least a little AA. Whatever that means. So for now, we smile and say she is AA/CC if we are asked. Often we are rebutted and told that she looks Hispanic or Samoan or even a little Asain. And honestly, they are all possibilities. I would guess she is going to be multiracial. We are waiting until she is a bit older and will have the genetic testing done.

[xotla]

I would get the genetic testing done if it was affordable. Most likely she will want to know, but you should remember that how one lives one's racial identity is not necessarily determined by "science". The test could say any number of things, but how your child identifies racially is determined by other factors as well, how you bring her up, interactions with people of different races, peers, context and how people react to your child.

As a "mixed" person myself I can tell you that my siblings, I assume, would get the same results as I would from a genetic test, but we don't all relate to our race in the same way.

ps: I would definitely have to agree with the person who said it could be difficult to use such a test to tell if someone was Cuban or African-American. Many people of both groups have some African, Native American and European heritage.