[Forever_family]

Today's event took place at McDonalds Playplace and I hope this is the worst experiece we will ever have. It was as bad as it gets.

I will avoid places like this in the future. We arrive with C (almost 8!) and E (my almost adopted full AA 2 year old), my 3 year old nephew, and my college aged SIL. I went to the bathroom as my SIL watched over the kids. I come out of the bathroom to my very upset daughter, she tells me that there are boys making fun of E saying "watch out, he's black!, watch out for the black boy" and then running away from him. I go over and listen, I'm worried but didn't hear anything, think they are playing a game and are somewhat innocent, maybe we should leave? Surely their parents will step forward. I then walk over to my SIL who said that she heard them screaming it so loud the entire room full of parents should have heard it. I then hear the group screaming "oh no, here comes the black boy! Run..." It was a game they were playing. E was oblivious, C was not, I was not and neither were the parents in the room. I mean it was a full house and there were at least 6 boys of all ages screaming it loud over and over and running away from my son. I was livid. It was not like parents couldn't hear what was going on. So I get up in the middle of the room and in a loud voice say, "there are children screaming something about my son being black and then running away from him. Parents could you please ask your children not to say this, its not a nice way to talk or play!" I was angry. I notice a mother laughing at me. I know I was mad, I know it sounded maybe stupid to raise my voice like that in a full house, but wow, how could I stand and not say or do anything? Seeing her laugh and parents sit there and do NOTHING made me angrier. I wait, nobody gets up, nobody says anything. Then I hear this little boy doing it again, "Watch out here he comes, its the black boy!!!" I ran over slammed my hand on the plexi glass as he wasn't paying attention to me talking, too busy shouting about my child being black and scary. I then told him he was not to say that again about my son, that it was not a nice way to talk and that my son wanted to play like everyone else. I think I scared not only him (he was at most 3 years old, I have NEVER in my life done something like this) but I scared every child in there. That was the end to the black comments. I sat down in a daze next to my SIL. I think she was mortified. I felt like leaving but I thought no I deserve to be here and so does my son and we should stay to make a point. My C was very upset at what was said. 2 of the boys were older and I think they were the instigators. Nobody would even look at me....man I was angry. Then a nice young mom moved her meal and 2 small children next to us. she said "I know I don't look like it but I am part AA and my children are too, thank you for saying something." She went on to tell me how upset she was that the boys were talking like that. I was more upset that their parents could hear them, and even after I asked parents to stop their children from talking to my son like that, they still did not step forward to do anything about it. I know it was a game and the younger boys that were saying it were copying the older boys...but man I would have done something if any of my children ever said anything remotely like that, instead they all just sat there.

It ended up the one mother that was laughing was the mom to the older boys, go figure, wonder where they got their ignorant attitude? The scary part is that its not like there is no diversity there. It just happened at that moment and time my son had the darkest skin color in the room. There were hispanic children, biracial children, and native american children in the room with us along with mostly CC children. About 15 minutes later a large full AA family came. I was never so relieved to see them, just wish they would have been there when it all started.

Afterwards I thought about it and should have gone to management rather then shouting at the entire crowded room of adults and children.... I was reacting in the moment. I still can't imagine sitting there letting your older children pick on a 2 year old because he is a "black boy" and not do anything about it....wow. still flabergasted that this even happened.

[Proud2BHisMom]

I applaud you for speaking up. That is totally unacceptable. I would have definitely spoken to the adults in the room. It never ceases to amaze me how rampant ignorance runs in our society. For parents to allow their children to ridicule another child, especially a baby, because of the color of his skin (or any other difference) is irresponsible and a reflection of their true character. To blow it off by saying it was just a game is a lame excuse. If my child were behaving like that, I would have immediately put a stop to it!!! Those parents are raising their children to be narrow minded and ignorant.

[veggiegirl]

OMG!!! I am mortified that this happened to you! I can somewhat see people not saying anything because I've heard psychological studies about people not wanting to speak up in a group (even if someone is being murdered, sad as that is) - but, if it's THEIR kid that's in on it - totally WRONG. They are horrible parents, end of story! And the woman who laughed at you - well that is just unspeakable. I would have gone for a manager or maybe even called the police for harassment - not that they could do anything, but just to make a point.

[JustPeachy]

Oh, I think you did the right thing, absolutely, and I applaud you! Management wouldn't have done anything. Those "parents" (I use the term loosely) needed to hear what you said, as did the kids. I'm sure the kids were scared, but they were not harmed. In fact, you did them a favor and did exactly what THEIR sorry excuses for parents should have done. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I don't blame you for how you reacted (I'd have done the same). You shouldn't feel bad about it in terms of how you handled it, but being on the receiving end of it (along with your children and others) was horrific, I'm sure. At least the other mom appreciated what you did. It's not easy to stand up and speak your mind in a crowd (or even to confront one person), but perhaps if more people called them out on their absolutely unacceptable behaviour, these kids and their parents would stop it once and for all.

[Cjmeck]

OMG, I am in tears... Seriously, what is WRONG with people?!?! You know, before I read the sentence where you stood up and yelled in the center of the room; I was thinking to myself that is EXACTLY what I would have done. I don't know that its the right reaction, but I do know I would have absolutely done the same thing. I have been known to take children by their little hands back to their parents also... so I may have done that. And then I may have had parents telling me not to touch their kids and it may have actually gotten uglier than what you described. I am disgusted, SAD and angry; not only at the children but mostly at the parents. I am just so very sorry.

[bromanchik]

I applaud you. You know, I lost one of my best friends because I would not allow her son to call other kids "gay" in my house. She said I was being intolerant.

[cbrink7]

I think you absolutely did the right thing-if their "mom" would not handle it then someone needed to step up. I would have done the exact same thing!

[finallyamom0310]

I am flabergasted (sp) that there are still people out there that have that kind of attitude. I realize I live in a bit of a dream world where I hope and pray every day that people don't see the differences between them and others but this is just plain appauling. I really thought that in todays society that regardless of how parents were brought up that they would teach their children that everyone is the same, has the same feelings that can be hurt, and can be hurt physically the same as they are regardless of age, creed or color.

I am completely with you in the way you reacted and had I been there would have applauded you.

[linda512]

I am astounded as well. I give you a lot of credit for doing what you did. I agree, you had to do something, for both your children and yourself. It is easy to be intimidated in that kind of situation and not do something.
I am so sad that those kids were doing that and the adults were letting it happen. I guess we are not so advanced after all.

[OakShannon]

How awful! I'm so sorry that happened to you and your little ones. It makes me sick to my stomach. I think you did the right thing. The parents needed to hear you object and, even more, the children needed to hear that it was wrong. When they say things like that and no one objects, it is as if every adult in the room is saying it's okay. I hope and pray that this never happens to my son, but if it does - I want to be as brave as you were about confronting it.

Bromanchik - I'm trying to wrap my head around the fact that you were accused of being intolerant because you won't allow children to use "gay" as a slur in your home. I hear this all the time - and as someone who is gay I want to thank you for teaching your children that it's not acceptable.

[dalene]

I admire you for standing up and doing what was right. I have no idea what I would have done--but I hope I would have been as brave as you and said something! Like others, I can hardly fathom how things like this still happen...thank goodness for those who are "intolerant" to the slurs and rudeness of ignorant people.

[crick]

I'd have said something too, and it needed to be said. I likely would have gone up to the laughing sorry pathetic excuse scum on the bottom of my shoe doesn't deserve to have children mom and told her off completely. I'm extremely protective of my kids and my anger in that situation would have gotten the best of me, no doubt about it.

Don't know that I would have gone up to a 3 year old but I definitely understand the frustration after already having said something to the adults and not one person did anything.

More than the attempt to educate and stop the ignorant behavior, what you did is show your kids that you are there for them and will stand up for them. That is the most important thing here and they'll remember it.

[entropy]

I applaud you.
I've been at playgrounds before where parents just sit back and do nothing about how thier children are behaving. I watched one little girl go around hitting everybody with no one correcting her. When she made a swat at my child, I looked her in the eyes and "you do not hit my child". she walked off. she was between 3 and 4.

I sat there once and watch parents giggle while thier 5-6 year old sons fought.

You daughter watched you stand up for your son that is priceless.

[PersianMama]

A couple of years ago, I was with my kids, nephew, and parents in a Chic-Fil-A. My nephew and older two kids were in the play area, which is not part of the dining room, even though it's inside. I opened the door to realize that two older boys and my nephew (he was 8 at the time) were playing a game where they ran away from an AA boy. I heard my nephew say, "Get away from the black boy!" as he ran. I was beyond astonished. My family is not racist (he's being raised by my parents). He has never heard anything like that at home. I assume that one of the other boys started it, and he copied. I was so angry that I grabbed my nephew and pulled him out of the play area. I told him that he couldn't play for a few minutes so that he could think about how wrong what he was saying was.

I'm sad to hear that it wasn't an isolated incident, and that kids in other places play the same awful game. Those parents were terrible and should have stopped it before you even had to say anything, but especially after you did.

[Sleeplvr]

In the future... if this happens again… The goal is not to embarrass the child but the parent. You stand up and say "Excuse me, excuse me.... who is the parent of this child?" You get the parent to come forward to answer for it. Then you politely and loudly explain what is wrong. The parent should be responsible not the 3 year old.