[Forever_family]

The other thread got me to thinking, maybe this is a silly question.... I'm sure this depends on agency but why would ANY agency allow you to select and place with you a AA/CC infant if you were not open to a full AA infant? Obviously this is my opinion but it made me a little upset, is this common practice?

Living in the Caribbean submerged in African/Caribbean culture and learning/getting to know and be part of the AA community in the states over the space of years its very obvious that skin tone vary, even in families with the same parents with full AA and with AA/CC families. My foster sons mom is AA/CC but she looks full AA. My foster son looks full AA. She identifies herself only as full AA. I am perhaps her only CC friend despite that at some point she was fathered by a CC man...anyway that is besides the point.

I'm relatively new to private agencies and have only been a foster parent breifly but in our 10 week classes it was stressed that an AA/CC child often is identified as full AA by the CC community. Babies grow up, adorable little boys who are biracial will be identified when adutls with police, store security, ect as an AA man. Either way you must prepare that child to face racism at some point in their life. Perhaps when they hit puberty? My foster son's mother is very articulate, intelligent, etc. Its a long story as to why her son is in care but she projects herself as an intelligent person, she is polite, she is articulate, she doesn't fit the "stereotype" of what others would think of a mother who has a child in care. We deal with the same doctors and nurses, her son has special medical needs. SOme of them do not know the situation as in do not know I am the foster parent and she has a child in care. As in the security entering the hospital, the parking garage attendant. People treat her differently then they do me PERIOD. I've seen it with my own eyes. Anyone that pretends racism (stereotyping) is not very real is hiding their head in the sand. It is subtle but it is there. She is AA/CC and is treated as an AA woman. Anyway getting off of my soap box. I just don't understand why you would be comfortable adopting AA/CC but NOT full AA???? I'm sorry if I offend but I think that those who think their AA/CC child will identify with them more because they have a CC parent may be setting the child up for some heart ache down the road.

L

[jaenelle]

I'm interested in hearing about this as well.

[mommamarci]

The agency we were working with in Indiana allows you to specify only AA/CC. They have even allowed people to go so far as to say 3/4 AA & 1/4 CC!

[nickchris]

There is no difference IMO between both terms. When our SW asked us regarding our choice of AA or AA/CC we said what is the difference? most AA are not full AA. What I do think is that the term came about, based on what folks sees via the superficial looks (skin tone/hair/facial features) per our societies racial issues.
In the long run, people are more comfortable with friends and now kids who they can more closely relate to... not culturaly sp? or even via citizenship, but physical features. As the OP said, you are treated based on your physical appearance.

[Forever_family]

How can you ask for 3/4 CC and 1/4 AA, I mean who would think of that???? Is that actually on your agencies application as an option to check?

[traceyk]

When we were contacted originally about the 4 situations, one was described to us as 64% AA and 36% Cuban. I laughed and asked where those numbers came from.

[awaitingagirl]

That really is a good question and IMO I think its just in the head...AA/CC has SOME CC in it maybe? I dont know. we are open to ALL races. At first it was just AA/CC but then I thought huh... well if I am going to accept AA/CC then I can accept the rest. So, thats what we did and God will bring us whom we are ment to have in our family.

[mommamarci]

They do not have a spot to mark that, but they said they do have people who will call and sepcify 3/4 AA & 1/4 CC after they have been waiting for a little while. They think it will improve their wait time, I guess.

[hotspice58]

Wow!! nickchris is right. All AA's here for 4 generations are mixed with something: CC, Indian or Hispanic. I would think that applies to CC's also. So much for the races getting along.

[queenjane]

Honestly i think when CC people say they will accept a biracial infant, they are thinking about how "beautiful" biracial kids can be, and how they are "almost" white. I was in an adoption orientation with a couple who said they couldnt accept full AA because they lived in a rural area, but biracial would be ok, and that they had friends who had a biracial child who was "just beautiful"....i thought they were being very naive about race issues. I dont think you should be open to AA/CC if you arent open to full AA.


Katherine

[Pat Johnston]

My now 22-year-old daughter, who is AA/Latina and is now a senior at Howard University (a historically black college) came to us out of the blue (we were recruited!) because the agency placing her had no families on their prepared and waiting lists that were ready for her particular mixture.

The waiting European Americans expected "biracial" to be white and "something" not two different "races." The waiting AA families did not see her as AA "enough."

The issue of racial "degrees" is real in all cultures, as is racism.

Pat J

[nickchris]

True, everyone has issues becasue we are exposed to societal racism, both external and internal to our community. That is why more folks should speak up, sometimes ignorance is not bliss.

Originally Posted by Pat Johnston

My now 22-year-old daughter, who is AA/Latina and is now a senior at Howard University (a historically black college) came to us out of the blue (we were recruited!) because the agency placing her had no families on their prepared and waiting lists that were ready for her particular mixture.

The waiting European Americans expected "biracial" to be white and "something" not two different "races." The waiting AA families did not see her as AA "enough."

The issue of racial "degrees" is real in all cultures, as is racism.

Pat J

[Linny]

We've adopted a lot of times, and four of these were infants. The first two were international and the agency would not allow us to adopt AA or any other race with AA. (This was back in the late '70's early '80's!) They told both of us that dh 'would be alright....but Mrs. A....(meaning me)......you are too fair complected to adopt an AA child' !!!!!! In the end, we left the Orient with a baby from Korea and a baby from Japan. Now tell me.......how did they 'look' anymore like me---even faintly----than any other child of color would look????!!!!!

Back to adopting infants again, I've done a ton of networking and calling. Only ONE agency/entity specified that 'if you are wanting to adopt a bi-racial baby, you must be willing to adopt a full AA baby'. I like this. I think it makes a lot of sense; but I find it sad that this policy isn't done by more agencies/attorneys. There is still a 'request' by a lot of couples to have a child that is 'more white looking than black/brown'. While I don't agree with this at all......I think it's a very popular feeling and opinion.

On another note........in a class dh and I attended several years back, an American Black couple were speaking about the new toddler they had brought into their home for adoption. They were so happy, but when the group was told that the toddler was 'bi-racial (AA/CC)'........the adoptive mom said, "...but we haven't told our families this yet.'

Surprised, the rest of the group asked, "And why not?" The parents replied, "Because she would not be well accepted by them if they knew she was part white."

So my point is, this kind of racism goes both ways. It's just so sad that any family could receive a baby/child so precious, yet feel their racial ties would be shunned if relatives knew.
It definately made me think poorly of the adoption agency, that's for sure.....not to forget the fact that our opinion of the couple went down several notches! (Who'd want to be around relatives that thought this way in the first place!?!?!?)

Sincerely,

Linny

[tinatyme]

This is a really interesting discussion for me on many levels. I am the adoptive mother of a AA/CC daughter and the foster mother of an AA son and a AA/CC son.

The reason this discussion hits home however is because I'm AA/CC myself but I look (to most people) CC. As a result, my family has faced some of the things that potential transracial adoptive parents consider when they are thinking about adopting AA or AA/CC children, or any other mix.

My father is AA and my mother is CC. I have red hair, white skin, freckles, etc. In all other areas I look exactly like my father though most people can't look beyond skin color to see this (family definitely does). I say this to say that throughout history their have been many instances of mixed children looking CC or AA and "passing" in one race or another. It can be very confusing for the child however and doesn't honor their history or how they feel inside. You might adopt a child based on skin color but that doesn't change how they feel inside especially if they know their background and makeup. I heard so many hurtful comments about my friends and family growing up because people thought I was CC and, therefore felt comfortable enough to make racist comments, share private stories and jokes and just generally spew out their racism. I can imagine it might be the same if you were an AA/CC child that looked fully AA.

With that said, I was raised by my CC mother with my AA/CC siblings and I grew up happy. Sure, we faced challenges, stares, comments, etc., but given that chance our CC and AA family stepped up to the plate and loved us and our community adjusted. I learned how to be a strong (and vocal) proud AA/CC adult. If you teach your children how to reason and make sure that they have confidence and self esteem (IMHO) they can face many obstacles.

As to these adoption agencies, I would never work with any agency that would let you choose between AA or AA/CC. Unfortunately, there is a historical basis for the percentages (68% black/32% white) etc. In the past if you had a drop of AA blood you were considered AA despite what you looked like. It was the basis of how you were categorized in our country, what benefits you got, and what discrimination was acceptable for you. On my birth certificate I'm listed as Black. No biracial, mixed, multiracial,etc. At the University where I got my bachelor's and Master's, I'm black. Many forms that I fill out still don't have a spot for biracial and interacial and don't get me started on the US census and how people are "counted".

Sorry this has been such a long post, but I think it is an important discussion especially if agencies are allowing these distinctions to be made and therefore educating new adoptive parents that there is something wrong if you are full AA or 3/4 AA instead of 1/2. This is a reflection of the discrimination in our country both internal and external and there should be something done about it. A website that I have found helpful since I was a teenager in thinking about some of this issues is http://www.interracialvoice.com

Tina

[rredhead]

Hi!
This is a really good question! I think I have a different perspective though.
We were open to any type of AA, though we had to list our preferences in order for the agency. DS is AA/CC. Because he's bi-racial, next time we would like to have a daughter who is AA/CC. Not because of looks, but because of the cultural differences between being full AA vs. bi-racial. Of course, we would be happy with a full AA baby, an AA/H baby, or even a CC baby. (Although when I typed that CC, I was like, oh, that would be weird!)
I also think that if the prospective parents are bi- or multiracial, no matter what those races are, it would seem natural to many people for them to specify that those races be present in their future child. Although, I began to wonder if that's the same as white parents wanting only CC children? Hmm...
Lots to think about!

-R