[stacyone]

My 14-month-old had her last bottle last night (just doesn't know it yet -- she's been refusing it regularly so we're going to try warm milk in sippy cups for a few days) and I'm wondering about the whole passy thing. I'm leaning towards pulling it in a couple of months, after she's moved to the 1-yr-old room at day care (big adjustment) and after a trip up north (sucking helps keep her ears clear on the plane). She only uses it at night.

Any thoughts?

[bennett]

mine had it til 2 ish

i wouldnt take both away...

[mckenzy]

I pulled my oldest childs passy at about 18mths. To this day I think it was so traumatic on him. My other kids were all blankie babies. They say that the passy is supposed to be the security blanket for non-thumb suckers. I don't know if it's true or not, but to this day my son has problems with insecurity. Whatever you decide to do, good luck to you!

[laurajane]

I tried a few times to pull the bottle/passy with my son, didn't work. One day it hit me to have him throw them away. We had a big to do over it. We said good bye to each thing and he put them in the trash can himself. I kept repeating "good for you you are such a big guy now!....." Then we took the trash bag out to the dumpster, saying goodbye the whole way.
Never had a problem, never shed a tear. It was amazing. But he did it all himself and was part of the process and I think that made the difference.

[mckenna]

my son had his last bottle at 12mo and 2 weeks old. that was much harder to take away than the passy. he was about 18mo when i took his night time passy away. i knew it was about time since it fell out soon after he fell asleep and he did not use it after that. he had two long nights but after that he was fine. now his 1/2 sister is living with us (foster situation). she takes a passy and bottle, my son is now 2. anyway at first he tried to suck on her bottles and passy's but he could not really get the hang of it and gave up. one funny thing he did was that when i was trying to get rid of the bottle, we had a book called bye, bye bottle. when his sister came to live with us, he dug it out and is now making me read it all the time. he either wants to remind himself why he doesn't need a bottle or maybe he thinks i should take his sisters away.

[Judilyn]

I would not pull both, rather do the bottle gradually (first.) For example start limiting the times of day your child can have it like nap and bedtime. Then work your way from there.

My son was hard to break of the bottle. Much harder than my first child. When I fianlly got him down to 1 bottle before bed I had to then decrese the amount it in every night. When he finally was down to 3 oz I cut it completly.

Every child is different. Often at 14 months they still require it for comfort.

Another suggestion I have is this. Being a Director for a Large Day Care Center I ask parents to hold off taking their child off a pacifier right away when they move up to the toddler room. IS your baby really attached to it? I have been a day care director for many years and I have seen a link between kids who are taken off a pacifier too soon and then beginning to bite,especially those enrolled in group care. If your baby is not really attached to it he/she may be OK.

At our center one of the requirements for moving up to the toddler room is being down to 1 nap time and only needing a bottle to ease into sleep. (Children are not allowed to sleep with a bottle and state law prohibits us from letting them carry one around all day.) So it's usually pretty easy to wean from a bottle once they have gotten settled in their new room. Your wise to wait until your baby adjust.

Let us know how it goes!

Judilyn

[stacyone]

Well, it took a few nights, but Molly is starting to accept her nighttime milk from a sippy cup. We stopped giving her daytime bottles right after her first birthday.

As for the passy, since she only uses it at night or in times of high stress, we're going to maintain status quo until she's ready to give it up. When she starts waking up without it and isn't looking for it (and boy, does having it make that first diaper change go smoother), then we'll know she's ready.

Thanks for the input!

[Sabra]

Hi Stacyone:

You are wise to one at a time. Young children have tactile instincts
which the way I understand it is how they learn. They are so smart they just know to do certain things. You have probably heard about the stage where babies put everything in their mouths for instance. That is how they learn at that stage. The baby actually knows intinctly that by feeling, touching, tasting the object they will learn what it is. Pretty smart!

I think little ones that love their passy's know that they instinctly need that sucking sensation for comfort and sensory sensations that are important to them. As they grow and develop their need becomes less and less. We can give them positive reinforcement and love them into each new stage. There can be appropriate times to use passy and other times not for passy. I think you will know in your heart when your child is ready for less and less passy.

I remember when we had talked to our oldest daughter about her passy that she loved and told her about her birthday coming and how she is a big girl and uses the big her potty, etc. And that passy was for naptime and less and less passy is cuz she can do so many big girl things now. And we just about died when she put all her passys in the trash herself just a day before her birthday telling us she was a big girl now and that she did not need her passy. And she didn't ask for passy again. There were times I was really wondering if she would want to go to school someday with passy she loved it so much! As a parent we just don't know. But as she was able to comfort herself in other ways and explore new things as she got older she understood that she would be okay without her passy and she was. I can't remember I may have kept one of those passys around for an emergency but as I recall amazingly we did not need it. She was ready!

You sound like you are good at sensing out your child. Good for you.

Warm regards,

[ladyjubilee]

I don't know about orthodontics....but passies do pose a choking hazard. Once a child has teeth, they tend to chew on the passie---and then draw the bits back when they suck on it.

[sigrid]

Hi! Our daughter still likes a bottle sometimes either in the morning upon awakening or at night during storytime. She said this morning that pretty soon she will be too big for a bottle! I am taking a more relaxed, supportive approach. I don't want to enforce something just because of societal constraints. Some days she doesn't even think of a bottle. I nursed my other daughter (21 yrs.) til she was 3 yrs. Why should the comfort of a bottle be any different? Our daughter is 3 yrs.

[Allegro]

DO you think it's easier to ween a child from the bottle if they didn't/don't use a pacifier. My 11 month old would never take a pacifier. She was breastfed until she was 7 months old taking one bottle a day (to give me a break). Last week she had her last bottle with nary a protest. Just so I don't get attacked for being to rigid - she never really seemed to enjoy the bottle all that much. We introduced the sippy cup to encourage her to drink more at our doctor's suggestion because she wasn't taking in enough fluids. She didn't drink any more but she does like it better.

[nancynic]

Hi,

I'm not sure about the correlation of weaning from a bottle and pacifiers - what an interesting speculation ... I think each child is an individual, with individual likes and needs. My sons (who are now grown men) loved their pacifiers and breastfeeding ... and when they were ready (both under 1 year), they took to their sippy cups. I think it's very important to watch children - who give us clues to what they need. My sons were very different in terms of how long they nursed ... one could be at my breast for an hour, the other was 'done' in ten minutes.

Ohhh I loved those days with my infants, all the rocking, nursing and gazing!

NancyNic

[mckenna]

that is interesting, my son loved his bottle and passy and it was hard to remove both, but my daughter did not care much for a passy and we are starting to lessen the amount of bottles she has and she could care less, she really like a sippy cup and i don't think it will be hard at all to get rid of the bottle. maybe this is just a coincidnece, but there might be a tie in.