[student01]

Hello, my name is June and I am a student from Cardinal Newman High School. I am doing a project on international adoptions and have a few questions about how parents feel when their child asks them about their native roots. This will remain anonymous. If you have some time to answer these questions it would be greatly appreciated.





For those planning to adopt children


Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?


Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?


How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?

Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?


Do you plan to adopt more children?


If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?


Will you support you child as they explore their native roots?


If so, to what extent?




For those who have already adopted


What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific
country?


Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why?


How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots?


How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your
child? How did your child feel?


For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female?

Maried?

Race?

Age?

[Shoshana]

Hi Student: I thought I'd respond to your questionnaire. I'm a college professor & I like to support student research. Good luck with your project.

My daughter is 2 years & 3 mos. She was born in Guatemala and I brought her to the US when she was 3.5 months old.

What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific country?

Domestic adoption would have been difficult as I am a single parent and less likely to be chosen by a expectant mother. I was unable to do foster-adopt as I work full-time. That left international adoption. China has a strict limit on singles, Korea is closed to singles, and generally, children from Russia live in orphanages and thus have greater risk for attachment issues (as well as in utero alcohol exposure) than children from Guatemala. Guatemala babies are typically placed in hogars (small group homes) or private foster families. The incidence of alcohol/drug usage is very low and the babies are remarkably healthy. Additionally, I have many Spanish-speaking friends and have always been drawn to the culture.

Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why?

If I were to adopt again, I would only adopt from Guatemala. Why? For the reasons delineated above as well as my belief that I will be more successful in the integration of one extra culture into our family than two. I think the cultural, racial, and ethnic similarities would be beneficial to a child.

How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots?

I have already conducted a search, via an intermediary, for my daughter's biological mother. I have sent photos and will continue to do so. The initial contact occurred this past summer so our future "relationship" is not certain, but it is definitely something I feel compelled to pursue. I am an adoptee (closed era, US) and have been in close contact with my bio family for many years. If my daughter wishes to have contact, then I will do everything I can to facilitate that. At the very least, she will have pictures of her bio relatives. I will also do my best to ensure my daughter is bilingual (she's already wait-listed for 1st grade in a dual language program!)

How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your
child? How did your child feel?

I can't answer the second part of the question as my daughter is only 2. I loved the experience of traveling to Guatemala and will return for extended vacations when my daughter is older. I love the culture, country, language. Sometimes, I feel like an imposter, or an intruder but I felt this way before I even considered adoption.

For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female? female

Maried? single

Race? white

Age? 46

[foxl]

For those who have already adopted


What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific
country?

We had an agency we trusted and chose from the countries they worked with.


Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why?

No -- 1) India said we are too old. 2) Guatemala was too expensive for the third one 3) China was less expensive and we wnated a girl this time.


How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots?
They are too young but we tell them about their native countries and their traditions a lot. I read literature from all 3 countries, and some history besides.


How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your
child? How did your child feel?
Children are too young to get it yet. I probably bought into my first one's culture too much! But it has been a huge education getting to know more about each country and its contrast to the US.


For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female? Female

Maried? Married

Race? Northern European

Age? 48, kids are 4.5 and 2.5 plus one in process, 18 mos.

[Lissa]

For those who have already adopted


What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific
country? My husband and I already had a keen interest in China and it's culture. We felt of the countries that participated in international adoption it would be the easiest and most natural for us to share with her.


Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why?
Probably not...but if we do adopt another we have discussed Ethiopia. We would really like our second child to be male and we prefer a younger child as the attachment issues are usually not as severe with younger children.


How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots? So far she's not interested in her roots because she's only 14 months. All she's interested in is how to get mommy to give her another cookie! However, I have many books on China, I have children's books with Chinese children, I bought Chinese books and music, I play her Chinese lullabies every night. We have art from China up in our house. We have adopted the Chinese holidays's and joined the FCC (Families with Children from China)


How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your
child? How did your child feel?Thusfar it's been my journey only and I have enjoyed it thoroughly. The Chinese people are beautiful kind and generous. They have the oldest continuous civilization still in existance filled with beauty and majesty...I am constantly learning more and I am in awe of them.

For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female? I am Female as is my child

Married? Yup. For 8 years.

Race? I am Caucasion as is my hubby. My child is Zhuang Chinese. (A minority race...most Chinese are Han.)

Age? I am 39, Hubby is 33 and Baby is 14 months

[kelleymac]

[quote=student01]For those who have already adopted

What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific country?
We chose Guatemala due to the age of children coming home, our comfort level with hispanic culture (and wide group of hispanic friends) and the foster care in Guatemala. We found that children from Guatemala are generally healthy and come home with fewer attachment issues.

Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why?
Very likely we will adopt again and if we do, it will be from Guatemala. We had a wonderful experience and have an awesome son. We want him to have a sibling of the same gender and race so he will have someone who can more fully relate to him since we're caucasian.


How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots?
Our son is still young enough that this hasn't presented itself yet, but we have a wide circle of hispanic friends, we plan to continue to teach him spanish, and we will begin visiting Guatemala regularly when he is about 4-years old. I feel it's vitally important for him to have that link to his past.


How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your child?
It has been remarkable. Our entire extended family has learned a great deal through our experience. It has also shown me another side of racism in the US.

For Statistical Purposes
Male or Female female
Marired? yes
Race? caucasian
Age? 35

Good luck with your project.

Kelley

[SydneyRN]

For those planning to adopt children


Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?
It seemed the best fit for our family. We are newly married (less than 2 years), and not of the majority religion, so felt that domestically we might be at a disadvantage.


Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?
We will raise our children to know their Guatemalan heritage, as much as is possible and as much as they want. We understand that when we expose them to their culture, we will be exposing them most likely to "stereotypically" Guatemalan things and they will not necessarily get a true experience of being Guatemalan.

How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?

We have bought books on Guatemala, are trying to learn as much as we can about it. We've bought kids books for them too. We will also participate in hispanic cultural events in our community and will travel back to Guatemala as our kids express interest. We would also like it if they could remain bilingual.
Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?

We plan to adopt from Guatemala. We liked that Guatemala is so close, that we could travel there more frequently if the kids wanted to. We also chose Guatemala because the kids tend to be healthy, without fetal alcohol syndrome, and because you can get young babies (though we are now adopting a sibling group currently ages 2 and 3). We also felt that we could share more of their culture and that there was more opportunity to support their culture than there is for Russian or Chinese children in our community. We also felt that we could more easily learn Spanish than Russian or Chinese.
Do you plan to adopt more children?

Since we're getting two right now, a second adoption is far from our minds. But, it's a possibility.
If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?

I would like to stay within the same culture, so that our kids would all have something to share.
Will you support you child as they explore their native roots?

Yes, we will support them.
If so, to what extent?

By offering to go with them to visit Guatemala again. We also hope to keep up communication with their birth mother, which is especially important to me because the kids are older and will have memories of her and of their country of origin.


For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female?
Female
Maried?
Yes
Race?
Caucasian
Age?
29

[kymk]

Hi June! Good luck on your project!

Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?
I have always been interested in adoption, as that I am adopted myself. I saw a documentary on tv last year about the orphanages in China, called The Killing Rooms. I felt it was put on my heart to adopt internationally. I've never really been too interested in domestic adoption. I have mixed opinions about open adoption, and I know a handful of people who have had heartbreaking experiences domestically - changes of heart, etc.

Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?
Of course! Unfortunately my own adoption was very closed and I knew nothing, not even what city I was born in. I really wanted to know my nationalities and wanted to identify with those. I think it's extremely important. I am currently taking an online class from the Adoption Learning Partners and they state that when you adopt you then share that heritage with your child, as they share yours with you now as well.

How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?
I plan to celebrate certain holidays, bring traditions into our life, have books and maps, artwork, clothing, children's books/fairy tales, make traditional foods, etc. As the child grows older, we can go to festivals, have our own, travel to other countries, most anything (within reason of course!) that he/she would be interested in, be it music or language or whatever. I would like to bring some of it in early on and then take from their lead as they become interested, just as you do with a child's interests.

Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?
I am in the beginning process of adopting from Ethiopia. A friend of mine told me she was interested in it when she found out I was thinking about international adoption. I did a little research and was immediately drawn to it. My first initial reaction was of no hesitation, like I would have absolutely no problem with it. The children and the people of Ethiopia are beautiful, inside and out. We have several ties to Africa - we thought for a while of buying a house in South Africa. I am also impressed with the adoption process through Ethiopia. It seems to be run very smoothly and efficiently, relatively speaking, and the children seem very well cared for.

Do you plan to adopt more children?
I think I would like to - it's early to say. I have one 3 year old biological son and I don't know if I might get pregnant again or adopt - maybe whichever happens first!

If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?
I'm open to most anything. I think again from Ethiopia would be great or China.

Will you support you child as they explore their native roots?
Absolutely!

If so, to what extent?
I think that depends on what he/she wants. I'm open to travel, to meeting others within our country, or even just things we can do within our house or community.

I'm female, married, Caucasian, 33 years old.

[andreagaspard]

For those planning to adopt children

Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?

International adoption wasn’t our first choice. Our first choice was domestic open and private adoptions. The journey was long. Our second choice was adopting a foster child who’s parents had their parental rights dissolved. We felt foster adoption wasn’t a choice for us. Our third choice was international adoption.

Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?

Definately

How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?

We are already looking into Chinese community centers and local support groups for parents with Chinese children.

I think that children really don't care, especially when they are teenagers, to know where they come from. At least that has been my experience. My family is from Mexico and I have no ties to that country since I am a 4th generation American. However, when I reached my 20's, and even more so today in my 30s, I do wish I could speak Spanish (even just a little Spanish) and knew which area of Mexico my family came from.

One way I think they can try to stay in touch with their roots is the have a Chinese pen-pal.

I also have started a scrapbook and diary about our experience of adopting him or her. I'm also collecting articles about China.

If they wanted to when he or she is older, we would let them be a foreign exchange student to China.

Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?

We chose China primarily because the cost was lower and the Chinese government has a streamlined process. Which means we would have a child in a certain time frame.

Do you plan to adopt more children?

We haven’t decided since we are still thinking about the first adoption, but if we can afford it, probably yes.

If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?
Yes.

Will you support your child as they explore their native roots?

Yes

If so, to what extent?

In the same way as above

For Statistical Purposes

Female
Married
Hispanic (Husband is Caucausian)
Age 35

[meimaemomma]

For those planning to adopt children


Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?
We explored domestic and international adoption extensively. We were open to a child of any race and culture, so our inclination for a domestic adoption (we are a caucasian family) was to adopt an aa infant/young child. But we also didn't want to be "competing" with other families waiting for babies here, and we were told that there were this year about 3 families for every baby domestically, regardless of race. It was so important to us to parent a child who needed us as much as we felt as a family that we needed another child/more children. Ethiopia seemed like the best fit to that sentiment for us.


Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?
Absolutely, to the extent that we can.

How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?
There is not a large Ethiopian-immigrant population in our city, but we know places were there are, and we will visit them. We're also fortunate to live and work in a university setting, so we expand our cultural contacts and knowledge that way. We also live in a very diverse community, work with, have friends, and have chosen schools with people of many different cultural backgrounds, and have aa people in our lives who can support our child and provide role models.
We've done simple things, like already add Ethiopian folktales, stories from Africa, books and art with African and multiracial families into our life with our four year old son (cc).
This is not so much about being in touch with "native roots" as it is filling our world with people who look like all of our children.

Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?
Ethiopia, for the reasons above.

Do you plan to adopt more children?
Yes

If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?
Yes. We feel that as a cc family, it is very important for us to have two of our children share the same background, look more like one another, etc. Though part of me thinks it would be an amazing experience to add another culture to our family through the adoption of another child, for us it seems right to have at least two children from Ethiopia.

Will you support you child as they explore their native roots?
Absolutely.

If so, to what extent?
I would do anything or go anywhere that was healthy for my child/children. We are already planning for a return trip to Ethiopia when our children are older; ideally, if they'd like, we'd spend some extended time there.
Adoption brings families together and provides great joy, but there have been and there will be many losses associated with it for our children. We don't want a loss of knowledge of their beautiful cultural heritage to be one of those losses, even if they will not be able to participate in it everyday, living as they will be in the US. We also feel that adopting from Ethiopia doesn't just mean that our children are from Ethiopia, but that our family now has this beautifully complex cultural heritage for us all to learn about and enjoy.

[kretzklan]

For those who have already adopted


What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific
country? We wanted a caucasian child - it was important for us that the child look like us, we felt it would help with family integration. We choose Russia specifically because we know others who have adopted from Russia and had good experiences. We knew there were many children available for adoption.


Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why? We adopted two children at one time. Our family is complete with three children (oldest is bio).


How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots? We have only been home a few weeks. At this time, we are focusing on creating a family environment - language acquisition being the most important step for us (the children are 6 and 7 years old). We plan on using Culture camps and an open line of communication to answer any questions or concerns.


How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your
child? How did your child feel? Again, it's a little early to know about this. Right now our new children are excited to be HOME and in America. They tell us "Yeah, America"...


For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female? Female

Maried? yes

Race? Caucasian

Age? 33

[student01]

Thank you for all of your help. It is greatly appreciated.

[randloar]

For those planning to adopt children

Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?
We were not comfortable with the frequency of failed placements that we were quoted for domestic adoption as well as the lack of control while we "waited" (and competed) to be matched to a birthmother. As well, we were given a < 2 year wait to complete the process, which seemed somewhat long to us.

Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?
We will do our best to continue to teach our children of their native heritage, and expose them to as much of this as they are comfortable with.

How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?
Heritage camps, books, movies, photos taken while we were in country, a trip back when they are older.

Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?
We are adopting from Kazakhstan because during our research we became intrigued with the culture and the people. The country has an interesting past, and present, and it has been intriguing to learn more about it. We were also very impressed with how the children are taken care of in the orphanages prior to finding them their forever families.

Do you plan to adopt more children?
We will be adopting two at once during this trip, and are not sure what our future holds.

If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?
Have to wait and see.

Will you support you child as they explore their native roots?
Definately.

If so, to what extent?
To whatever extent is reasonable. When they are old enough, we will support them to go and visit their birthcountry, and would even go with them if they wanted us to.




For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female?
Female

Maried?
Married

Race?
Caucasian

Age?
35

[hjdeth1]

For those who have already adopted


What was the reason for adopting a child from that specific
country?
After a failed domestic adoption, I wasn't willing to deal with the birth parent situation here in the US. And foster care adoption also came with too many strings. As soon as I decided to go international I knew the country had to be Ukraine...I have a Ukrainian aunt (by marriage) that I worship.


Will you adopt more children from the same country or from others? Why?
I have 4 Ukrainian children adopted in 3 separate adoptions. My next adoption will probably be from Haiti since other than more siblings, the only request from my children is that their new brother/sister look like my youngest son.

How did you allow your child to keep in touch with their native roots?
we have Ukrainian books, music, movies, traditions etc.

How did it feel to go through a cultural journey with your
child? How did your child feel?
are you talking about the cultural transition from Ukraine to the US? transitions are difficult in the beginning with older children, but all adjusted fine. I know that at times the kids experienced frustration (all the rules of their world changed and they could no longer communicate effectively), wonder at new sights, fear of the unknown, anger at the changes, and mourning for those friends left behind

For Statistical Purposes

Male or Female?
I am female. my children are 2 males and 2 females
Maried?
single
Race?
i am caucasian, my children are caucasian, romany, ukrainian/african/philipino, and ukrainian/tartar
Age?
I am 43, my children are 11, 9.9yo, 9.7yo, and 9.5yo

[cakegirl]

For those planning to adopt children

Why did you decide to adopt a child from another country?
Local adoption is almost non-existant in my country (Australia). Most children go into temporary foster care and are then reunited with their birth parents. A small number are adopted by other family members, and even fewer are adopted by strangers. The likelihood of me adopting was next to zero.

Will you raise the child with them knowing their native heritage?
Yes, definitely.

How will you allow your child to be in touch with their native roots?
I have family and friends who are from China (where my child will come from) and there is a big Chinese community in the city near where I live, including cultural events, festivals, etc. I also plan to travel to China with my child periodically.

Which country would you like to adopt from? Why?
China - Firstly because once I'm 30, I'm eligible to adopt from there (not eligible to adopt from many others because I am single and not religious). I have extended family who are Chinese, and so I am already part of an Australian/Chinese family.

Do you plan to adopt more children?
In an ideal world, I would love to adopt (at least) two children from China and have (at least) two biological children.

If so, from the same country as the first or other countries?
Yes

Will you support you child as they explore their native roots?
Yes, I hope to guide her on her way, and when she's old enough, she should have enough experience behind her to be able to make her own way.

If so, to what extent?
As far as she needs.

Rebecca

[MrsSmith]

I am moving this thread to the appropriate forum.