[gazoogleheimer]

My husband was born 39 years ago, today. His mother gave him up for adoption, which started him on his life journey that eventually brought him to me. Thank you, whoever you are. Without your brave decision, I would probably still be alone, today. I would certainly not know my two beautiful children (and his beautiful daughter from a previous marriage). I would not have this wonderful man to share the rest of my days.

We're very happy. I can't imagine my life without him.

He's wondering about you, today (as we both do, from time to time, throughout the year). We speculate the story surrounding his conception & birth. We know it must be something pretty extraordinary, to result in such an extraordinary life (well, that's what I think, anyway )

We hope you're well & that your life worked out nicely for you.

Big Hug
Maureen

[gazoogleheimer]

We've started a lazy, passive kind of search. Registered, a few years ago, at Soundex (is that what it's called?). Thinking about following up with the state, soon. But, from what I understand, if she was curious & wanted to find him, I'd imagine that she, too, would have registered with the main national search registry, right? And, we would have heard from her by now...

Don't want to intrude on her life, if she's not comfortable with it.

Just thought I'd let some other birthmom's know that their kids are (might be) thinking of them on their birthday, too. And, grateful for the hard decision that they made.

[Jackiejdajda]

gazoogleheimer wrote.. I'd imagine that she, too, would have registered with the main national search registry, right? And, we would have heard from her by now...

Some women (myself included) were told by a judge that after the papers were signed she was no longer her babies mother.
I will never forget standing behind that desk and being told this.

I believed that for almost 25 years.. I never spoke of my son except with my husband.. I did my best to not think of him..

It hurt too much..

I relinquished in 1965.. I am in my early sixties.. I taught myself the computer and I learned how to search on the internet..
My bson found me there..
He found me in 1999..

She may not know she has the right to search.. She may not use a computer..

A private investigator may find her.. Your husbands non identifying information can help.. It also may be a very interesting read..

Jackie

[gazoogleheimer]

Sure - I'm always glad to talk about it :-) He was born 11/19/1964 - Elmhurst Memorial Hospital - Elmhurst, IL.

He was adopted through Catholic Charities, but his mother told me how the local priest called her just a few days after her other son 's(also adopted, as was his younger brother, years later) first birthday. The priest said he had a baby available (5 days old, then, I believe) - first adoption fell through for some reason & baby needed a home. My mother-in-law spoke to my father-in-law, then called the priest back to say 'OK'.

MIL says that when the priest came to drop him off, he was accompanied by some guys who looked kind of shady/mafia-like. Not sure exactly what that was all about

For some reason that I don't remember, my husband believes that Bio-mom was a teenager. Not sure if that's a fact, or something that his mother told him re:adoption in general, that stuck in his mind as a fact.

Two of my sisters (I have 7) gave up babies for adoption through Catholic Charities when they were teens (in the 60's & 70's). Both have searched & reunited (one has contact w/birth-son, but adoptive parents are not very supportive (she later married the birth-father & they have two more full siblings for birth-son) -- one has contact w/adoptive parents, but birth-daughter is a little hesitant (this sister later adopted 3 children thru Catholic Charities - varying degrees of openness in the adoptions)).

I find the entire blending, mixing, supporting, life stories of adoption fascinating I could go on & on...

- Maureen

[thesearchguru]

Are you aware that your husband can contact Catholic Charities and request "non-identifying information" about the birthparents? This report will generally give him this information:

A. Ages of birth parents at the time of relinquishment
B. Marital status
C. Other siblings born before the adoptee
D. Physical description
E. Ethnicity
F. Occupation
G. Education
H. Information about aunts, uncles and grandparents
I. Reason for relinquishment

The State of Illinois also has a "Confidential Intermediary" search program that will locate and contact a member of his birth family:

Obtaining Identifying Information: Identifying information is provided through an Adoption Registry.

Using a confidential intermediary: Adopted adults 18 or older and adoptive parents of an adoptee younger than 18 may use the confidential intermediary service.

Contact:
Confidential Intermediary Service
3158 Des Plaines River Road
Suite 120
Des Plaines, IL 60018
(847) 298-9096; (847) 298-9097
(847) 298-9097 (fax)

Using the Adoption Registry: Birth parents, adopted adults 21 or older, adopted adults younger than 21 with the consent of their adoptive parents, and birth siblings 21 or older may use the registry. Adoptive parents, adopted adults, birth parents, and birth siblings may exchange updated medical information throughout the life of the adopted adult. The registry also may act as an intermediary if either party does not want to be contacted. All parties also may exchange pictures and written statements through the registry.

Contact:
Illinois Adoption Registry and Medical Information Exchange (IARMIE)
Department of Public Health
Division of Vital Records
535 West Jefferson Street
Springfield, IL 62761
(217) 557-5159 or toll-free in Illinois (877) 323-5299




Adoption Genealogist




Other great websites to check out:
http://www.adoptionchat.com
http://www.adoptionlists.com
http://www.adoption.com
http://www.adopting.org
http://registry.adoption.com/

[gazoogleheimer]

Thanks for the great info! I just forwarded it to my husband.