[Mb20FanJen]

Hi everyone,
After 2 years of having custody of our nephew, our final adoption is planned for next Tuesday!!!! (3 days after his 3rd Birthday)

Anyway we are having a party for him at a Restaurant with close family and friends. (only about 30 people) I want to give out some sort of favor to remeber the day, but I am not sure what to do? Any ideas.

For our wedding we gave our 2 tulip bulbs to be planted in honor of our wedding, and I wanted to do something along the same line, but can't seem to some up with anything reasonably priced. Is it too tacky to do bulbs for a boy? Or if not, too tacky to do it again since we did it for the wedding?

Thanks for any input...
Jen

[DaisyN132]

Ok, so I am a few months behind in answering this one, but I have a question for you too

[DaisyN132]

Ok, so I am a few months behind in answering this one, but I have a question for you too...We have been a foster family for 3 kids since they were newborns, we finalized our adoption last week...do we have a party? this kind of seems weird, I mean they are no longer babies, (4,3, and 2) and everyone knows that they live at opur house. They have called us mom and Dad since they could talk. I don't know what to do. My mom wants to plan a family party, about 45 people, but this is not a bbay shower...please help. As for favors, what did you do? Thanks! Ruth

[JuliannaTeresa]

I had a 'Gotcha Day' Parties for both Adopted Daughters. Let your Mom have her fun!

Celebrating the day their Adoptions were Finalized!

For favors, I made Ornaments and used on the Ornament the stick on pictures of an event the Girls did with that person in the 6 month finalizing period ie, the first swim lesson, riding a horse, riding a bike, 'group hug'.

If there was no event. The stick on pictures were easy to use at the Party as taken together with Daughter as a Guest of the Party.

[hippiechick]

Oh, I think any child, no matter how old, should be honored of their adoption with a "gotcha day" party of some kind. I am not an adoptive mother (I am a birth mother), but your post got my wheels turning...

I wonder if you could buy small photo frames and place a photo of your child or your family into it--pictures color copy relatively cheaply at copy centers. Or p

If the child is old enough, make up "adoption papers" on your computer for the child to sign. In this way, the child can "adopt" you, which can be helpful for children if they've been in the foster care system, and have had a hard time finding a permanent home. This gives them a feeling of power or the choice of adoption.

I think that adoption announcements (similar to birth announcements) are very appropriate...even if people know that the child has lived with you, they still like to hear about your good news. you may have to make them up on your computer, as I've never seen stores carry adoption announcements. (I work with foster kids for a living, and have received several of these announcements. You include: the child's name/new name, if applicable, birth date, adoption date, parents names, siblings names, and a greeting of some kind---like "oh, boy, oh boy, oh boy" or "we proudly announce the arrival of a 40-lb. boy!")

As for the tulip idea, I think it's appropriate. You may want to choose a different flower--if the child is old enough, have him pick out which flower seed/bulb to use.

Another idea is to get those little bubble containers people often use at weddings and tie on strings/streamers w/ information about the child attached. Bubbles are carefree and also a symbol of childhood.

When you have your party, buy a small scrapbook and put your child's picture on the front. Then have each guest sign it--like an autograph/sign-in book.

You could also give out balloons imprinted with your child's name and adoption date on it--party supply stores will make them.

Okay, I think those are all my ideas!

[Ramani]

We had balloons and ribbons on the mailbox, and a huge paper sign printed up and placed over the front of the house both times our children came home for the first time. We also got 10 boxes of chocolate cigars wrapped in pink paper, and handed a chocolate cigar out to all of the kids in our little neighborhood (about 70 families with maybe 120 kids ; plus my my elder kid took three boxes of chocolate cigars to share with all of the kids in her grade. (I understand that the kids sang Happy Birthday in honor of her new sibling.) As to the party, that was very low key, close relatives only, kind of thing. We just had a nice meal at home, with a white frosted cake for desert with a dove on top for the child to play with.

[Mb20FanJen]

I see this question had alot of views, so there must be some interest out there for it....

First let me say. YES every child does deserve a party no matter what age. Our son was with us 3 years before the adoption and we still choose to have a party. It kinda made it all offical for us and the rest of our family.

What we decided to do was hand out frames with a picture of our son in it, and a note attached thanking everyone for coming.
I went to a local discount store. (the christmas tree shop) they have a TON of nice frames for a good price too.

I took a picture of him in his party outfit, then had then developed. I bought a bunch of different styles of the frames, (2 of each) and put them out on a table at the party. As people left they got to pick a frame of their choice.

Everyone seem to really like it, and with the different style frames everyone seem to find one they liked and that fit with their decor.

[k1m1s1]

I have a precious 3 year old that will be celebrating 1 year of being adopted in Dec. I am looking for ideas for having a party for his pre-school class in honor of this. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated.

[dl]

Do the children have birthday parties for their pre-school class? Will you be having a birthday party for your son? It might be confusing for the children to understand why your son has two parties.

The fact that I was adopted was always known to me and others. It was freely talked about but it was not focused on as if it somehow made me different from other children. My family celebrated my birthday the same as every other family celebrated their children's birthdays. There were no "anniversary of the day I was adopted" parties, thank goodness.

As an adoptee, I would suggest that if you feel the need to highlight this day, have a family acknowledgement and save the pre-school party for his birthday.

[k1m1s1]

The children in my son's preschool have parties on their birthday. Yes, I have always planned to highlight this day because it is a special day and the fact that he is adopted makes him special too and that is what I have always told him. We also have a 5 year old that came to be with us at birth also. We celebrated both boys' adoptions by going to the "Fun Place" of their choice. I plan to continue to celebrate this occasion for the Gift of God that it is for many years to come and we want their friends and family to be a part of the celebration also. I am sorry that you don't believe that being adopted is something to celebrate because both my boys are answers to prayers from a childless couple of 14 years. If when they are older, they want to do differently,then so be it, but for the meantime we plan to celebrate every year and thank God every day for giving us this day.Thanks for your thoughts though.

[dl]

I am sorry that you don't believe that being adopted is something to celebrate

I didn't say that I "don't believe that being adopted is something to celebrate". I suggested perhaps a family celebration vs. singling your son out to all the other children that he is "different" than them. Children can be cruel and to highlight something that makes a child "different" can result in unkind remarks and teasing. Celebrating as a family"by going to the "Fun Place" of their choice" sounds like a great idea. It celebrates the meaning of the day for your family.

I've never had any problem with being adopted as it was not held out as something that made me weird, different from anyone else or in any way "less than" a completely normal part of my family. I was always appreciative of the fact that I was adopted as I was raised with the belief that my biological parents wanted me to have a life that they were unable to provide for me at that point in their life. This belief was confirmed by facts this past year and more than ever, I am greatful to God that he led my aparents to me. Just like you, my parents too felt adoption was an answer to their prayers and felt that I was "special". However, they felt I was special because though I joined the family through adoption, I was now a normal part of their family. As I matured, they reinforced that I was "special" due to the person I became, not that I was "special" due to being adopted.

As with everything else in our lives we all have different perspectives and feelings about things. As I said, my adoption was never a secret ~ most everyone in my life has always known about it, including me from before I can ever remember being told. As an adoptee, I'm just glad that I was not raised and singled out as "the adopted child". I may have joined my family through adoption vs. being born into the family but I was simply raised as a very normal part of a loving family ~ no different than any of my friends ~ thus never felt weird, different or "less than" a part of my family. Also never experienced the many negative feelings I have read on the forum that some adoptees have experienced.

My parents Thanked God until their death that I was part of their life every day. I continue to Thank God for watching over me during 13 months in foster care and blessing me with the parents that he led to me. May you and your son's lives continue to be blessed.

[subtle3]

I have adopted twice so far and working on the third, we had small celebrations with just close family at home, but each child got to pick a favor to hand out to family friends and school with the announcement of adoption,(my new forever sister) example, my child who likes gardening gave out packets of seeds, one gave out hersherys kisses, another mints, another bookmarks and one braclets with the words adoption = love, As we are getting ready for our third adoption and first boy, our new son will give out little stuffed puppies and the girls will pick what they want

[jayarr]

Try Dog Bone Treasure Hunt - Hide either real Milk Bone dog biscuits or for smaller children bones cut out of heavy cardboard around the party area. You can give a prize to whoever finds the most or number the bones and they receive a prize based on the number they find. If you plan on doing the Animal Adoption activity you can assign each animal a number and then write the corresponding number on the bones. Once a child finds a bone with a number they can keep it or trade it for another one, but they can't have more then one in their hand at a time. Hide bones without number also so it will be challenging.

[wcurry66]

Funny to see this old thread revived just in time for our block party. I endedup getting 5 mounds of custom m&ms (pink, blue, and purple) with J's face on one side and her new name on the other side. Since our invitations didn't use the word adoption, I touhght this was a subtle wayt for parents who choose to discuss adoption with their kids

J is one of 3 (that i know of) adopted in her pre school class. So, the concept is not new to most of that group