[mrskdavis]

Many readers of this thread are still in the preplacement phase. As birthmom and AMs, what did you do that you would say DO THIS! Do you have any gems of advice that could save others time, money, heartache, etc?

[ellia3]

There are so many different adoption agencies, referral services, facilitators, and non profit agencies with fees ranging for 8,000-20,000. I recently found out that different agencies may have the same baby but charging different fees for the same situation. We were approached by and agency about a baby due in July in SC -fees were 12,000 and went on to the internet and another agency was advertising the same situation for 7,000. Pray every day and ask God for his divine directions and instructiions regarding your adoption because unfortunatley, but these agencies/facilitators have made adopt a for profit business that is truly not lead by God although they advertise they have been called by the Lord to do this work.

[HOLLYWOOD]

what I am doing right is using an attorney and doing a private adoption. I am going to be a birthmom.

[gkasche]

What I did right was take matters into my own hands and pray for God to lead us in the right direction. Instead of waiting around for the Social Worker to call us with a child...we researched tirelessly to FIND our child. I read everything I could get my hands on concerning adoption and educated myself. I found after years of trying to adopt domestically...that I could adopt internationally for less. In every country including the United States...there are the little agencies who do not charge huge fees for adoption. And as a Christian...it is sad for me to say that most agencies who advertise themselves as a Christian agency are among the most expensive. What I also did RIGHT was open up my thinking to include children of special needs. There is a whole host of special needs situations which are easily managed. We started to understand this when working with a small agency in India who only place special needs babies. Now 5 years and 3 adoptions later...we are the proud parents of three little girls. We also have two bio sons and are so happy with our big blended family. Karen gkasche@usachoice.net

[lucyjoy]

I had a therapist help me go through the records of a really tough child before placement so he could help me develop a plan to start things off right. He was also able to explain some medications I was unfamiliar with.