adoption.com

adoption.com

 
JOIN 800,000+ MEMBERS JOINJOIN Cancel
image






Adoption Forums®

Members List Photos Events Local Adoption Support Search Arcade Reviews Membership Upgrade
Welcome to the Forums. Register
If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ. You may have to register before you can post or search: click here to proceed. To start viewing messages, select a forum below that you would like to view or click View All of Todays Posts.
Forum Categories
User Name
Password

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
  #1  
Old 04-26-2012, 11:55 AM
atlonglast atlonglast is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2
Total Points: 5,046.76
Donate
Contested Stepparent Adoption - It is possible to succeed!

Hello everyone. 14 months ago when my husband and I began the process of me adopting his (then 3 year old) son, I scoured the internet for someone who had succeeded in a contested stepparent adoption. I couldn't find any stories of encouragement or success. In fact, I only found a few failures or some nasty comments about how it is a terrible thing to do.

Every situation is different, but I wanted to let everyone know that it is possible to win a contested adoption! We finally did! It didn't come without a price -- over a year and over $8,000.

We are by no means rich people and pursuing the adoption meant continuing to live with my in-laws rather than move into our own place, but knowing that I am 100% fully and legally my little boys mommy is worth everything we sacrificed to have this adoption go through.
Reply With Quote
Adoption Community Information
Become an adoption forums premium member to enjoy these Membership Benefits:
  • Remove Advertising
  • Unlimited Arcade
  • Unlimited Attachments
  • Increased PM Storage
  • Calendar Posting
  • Larger Avatars
  • Personal Page
  • Just $19.95 / yr!
Find Your Birth Family
Virginia
Click here to visit Birth Family Finders
Our association with investigators and researchers nationwide allows us to find missing birth family members. We're fast, affordable and all investigations are handled by a personal search specialist with your privacy in mind.
Birth Family Finders
 

  #2  
Old 05-23-2012, 02:11 PM
Birdietree Birdietree is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 1
Total Points: 236.89
Donate
Congrats!

This is such encouraging news to hear. I am in the process of trying to adopt my step son and bio mom is contesting. We are just in the initial steps so I'm sure it will be long and costly but well worth it. Good to hear it worked out for you. I hope and pray we have the same results!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 06-24-2012, 04:47 PM
OhTootles123 OhTootles123 is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 1
Total Points: 164.14
Donate
If you dont mind could you tell us what were the conditions regarding your contested adoption. I have an ex who hasnt seen or paid support for my 3 year old daughter. my fiance and i are getting married since he's been raising her. my daughter only knows him as daddy since my ex left when she was an infant. wer gonna get a step parent adoption filed but my ex was very abusive and vindictive so i wouldnt put it past him that he might fight it. some lawyers said i have a good shot but others say that him simply showing up for the hearing is enough to show "interest" and that the judge will not terminate his rights. by the way im moving to GA which is where this will be filed. and my ex lives in FL. the judge is granting me permission to relocate due to better job opportunities and the lack of his contact.

Last edited by OhTootles123 : 06-24-2012 at 04:50 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 06-24-2012, 06:26 PM
LoveMyGirl's Avatar
LoveMyGirl LoveMyGirl is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 166
Total Points: 24,439.34
Donate
Congratulations on your success. I hope that during this time, since the time this thread started, you and your family have been able to start to move on with your lives.

It's a tough road. Too many people think those of us who pursue this are either crazy for getting involved, or insecure regarding our spouse's past partners. Rarely do they ever realize it's about the love, security, and well being of the child involved. I know that we bent over backwards giving my daughter's biomother several years to get her life together and to start seeing her, but that time never came. Only when I filed to adopt did biomother show any interest whatsoever in seeing my daughter. Even then, it wasn't so much as wanting to parent her, but rather an attempt to prevent me from taking "her child". My daughter was in effect, her possession, rather than a living breathing child who had very real needs and wants. The process took nearly 2 full years before a successful completion of the adoption.

For those of you who are still attempting, or contemplating a step parent adoption, there is a site that helps you know what the law regarding adoption is in your state. State Statutes Search
__________________
Bio daughter K born 8/86
Bio daughter S born 6/92
Bio son D born 7/00
Beautiful bonus daughter K born 1/03

03/05 - 7/05: CPS removes K from biomom.. Lots of drama happens
07/05: K comes to live with us
02/10: I file for adoption!
02/10: Bmom files against us for visitation and child support
02/10: I counter file for shared legal custody w/my exH
04/10: Shared custody of K w/the exH granted
11/10: Bmom fails to show up on time to her own case's hearing and the case is dismissed.
01/11: Remarried K's Daddy. Now pursuing step-parent adoption.
05/11: Submitted second Adoption Petition!!!
06/11: Bmom decides to fight consent after no contact for 6 years.
08/11: Bmom in jail, misses status hearing
09/11: Bmom in jail again, misses consent hearing and the judge rules we don't need her consent!
10/21/11: Appeal period for consent IS over
12/07/11: I'm the Mama!! We are all DONE!!

Last edited by LoveMyGirl : 06-24-2012 at 06:29 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 07-01-2013, 03:19 PM
TNfamily4 TNfamily4 is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 1
Total Points: 201.71
Donate
We also had a successful contested step adoption!!

When we found out that our step parent adoption had been contested, we were really stressed out and came to the internet to find similar stories and didn't find any! So, I wanted to share our story with you!

My husband had custody of his son (I'll call the adopted son B) since he was 2 years old. The bio mom paid some child support off and on for a few years and had COMPLETELY stopped for 3 years. No phone calls, emails, letters, nothing. She hadn't seen B since he was 3 years old and B had no idea that the bio mom existed. I had been married to my husband for about 3 months when we started the adoption process (B was 7 at the time). The bio mom lived in Indiana and never has the same address or phone number for very long so it was hard to find her. We had to hire a private detective to find her and serve her the papers that told her I was going to adopt B. She had 90 days to respond (I think it was 90) and contested the adoption in like, the last possible week.
She started paying child support again at this time (do not let that worry you, judges see through that). She showed up for the first court hearing and was issued a free attorney (we paid about $3000 for ours!). So, they had to schedule another court date. She didn't show up for the second court date but my attorney didn't have some sort of paper that he was supposed to have sooooo we had to schedule another court date. On the third court date, she did show up. We all testified, it was dramatic at times... and I was able to adopt B.

In court that day, I felt so many mixed feelings about the whole situation. I was sad for B. I know that one day I'm going to have to explain to him that his bio mom was not able to care for him like he needed. She turned her back on him in the most tender and innocent time in his life. Honestly, I was sad for the bio mom too. I never ever thought I would feel that way toward her. After all, she is a grown woman who has made so many horrible decisions in her life that she completely lost custody forever of a child that she gave birth to.
I love B so much. I'm glad all of that all of this is behind us and we can move on as a family. If you would like to know more or need to know who my attorney was, please email me! (we live in Loudon County TN and our attorney was out of Knox)... Good luck with your step parent adoption!!!
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 03-20-2014, 06:16 PM
rosepedal1908 rosepedal1908 is offline
Junior Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 7
Total Points: 345.37
Donate
Do you have the adoption forms available? If so email me at rosepedal1667@yahoo.com
Reply With Quote
Reply

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Points Per Thread View: 1.00
Points Per Thread: 15.00
Points Per Reply: 5.00


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:19 AM.