[mrsgreen82]

My husband of 3 months wants to adopt my 4 1/2 year old son from a previous relationship. He lives with us and our 10 month old daughter. His bioloical father is not listed on his birth certificate and paternity papers were never filed. His father and I split up 3 years ago after he was arrested for domestic violence. He just completed his probation and parenting classes and anger management classes. But the police were just called to his house 2 weeks ago because him and his gf were fighting in front of my son and their daughter, about my son. She hates him and wants him gone. There was broken glass and phones and other objects on the floor when i went to pick up my son and i was left there alone with my son to search through thier crap for my son's coat. With that being said, I do not want my son to be put in a situation like that again. The fighting has been going on for about 6 months. I told him I do not want my son there if they are going to continue to be together, but he will not make her leave. He does not play with my son. My husband acts more like a father to him. His father is also taking anti-psychotics, anti-depressants, and anti-anxiety meds. He has been diagnosed with intermittent explosive disorder, and I'm afraid either him or his gf is going to end up hurting my son physically instead of just emotionally. What are my chances of getting around him signing off? Being that paternity was never established, he doesn't have any rights, and I know he won't sign off just to spite me. I live in PA.

[BrandyHagz]

Please contact an attorney or someone how knows the laws in your state- most of what the above poster said does not apply to all states - additionally, the process is not an overnight one - some states that do have a 1 year marriage requirement will allow you to start earlier than that.

The first step you should take, however, would be to legitimize the relationship (file for paternity, child support and custody) then move from there.