[jandkbeck]

My husband and I have been married almost a year. For the past 2 years I have been helping him raise his 5 year old son. He calls me mommy but knows I'm not his birth mother. His bio-mom left him here 3 years ago and has not seen him and has talked to him 3 times since. She's now fighting for custody of her other child, a 2 year old daughter, after getting out of rehab for substance abuse and she's trying to re-establish contact with my husband's son so it doesn't look so bad with her new custody battle. My husband and I have joint legal custody and the only right she has is to supervised hourly visits. We live in VA and she lives in CA and won't come see him. I want to adopt my step-son, who I believe in my heart is my child, and I'm wondering if this is going to be near impossible and if anyone else has gone through this mess.

[crabcakes]

Your husband should just ask the mother if she would consent to the adoption. You can't make a determination if it's impossible without knowing her intent.