[lacraig05]

OKay here's the story, my step-daughter's mother passed away in 2004. She has voluntarily called me "mom" for over a year. The maternal grandmother, who is obsessed with my step-daughter and want's to be her mother, has fought for visitation, won and basically got what a mother would get...and then some. She even threatened to have my husband put in jail for contempt if he didn't abide by the court paperwork!!! Anyway I have filed my step-parent adoption forms, and am waiting for Health and Human Services to call me. When the adoption is final...what rights do I have as my daughter's mother to fight the maternal grandmother on this visitation to either get it reduced to at least to 1/4 of what she has? Is this Possible?

[AJBs Mom]

If you actually get the adoption to go through, DO you have a lawyer or have you consulted one? See from what it sounds like to me is that the grandmother was granted legal guardian over the child to replace the mother. So when you do the adoption, you are going to have to terminate the grandmothers parental rights to the child. Basically it looks like the courts already gave the child a mother. So if you want to terminate her rights she would have to fall under no support or contact for one year. How old is the child, does she hate visiting her grandma or is it just a bother to you guys. Does the grandma abuse the child? See you are battling a custody/ visitation battle, I have been through the same. To actually answer the question. If the adoption does go through, then you can terminate all visitation with the grandmother or have her play by your rules. But I am not sure whether you actually have an adoption case or not. If the grandmother was able to take you to court and get visitation of the child, then I would look closer at the court orders because she more than likel has been given guardian ship over the child. I would do some research and maybe consult a lawyer if you can.

[tgage]

Different states have different laws (both statues and case law) on this subject. One thing to keep in mind is that most likely, all the grandmother has is an order for visitation - NOT custody nor has she been deemed the mother.

This is a very active subject - grand parent visitation post step-parent adoption. Some states say that once there's an adoption - the parents are the parents and ALL visitation is null and void.

Other states say that grand parent visitation orders which existed before the adoption stay in effect.

Consult with your lawyer - or if you're doing this yourself - be ready to research the statutes and case law for your state.

Tim