[Julibras2117]

First let me start by saying that we are a military family and will be going to the legal office as soon as my husband returns from Iraq, however I would like to get a general idea of what is coming up, and insights from those who have already went through the process.

My DS is 9 years old today. My husband and I have been married since my DS was 13 months old, and have been together longer then that. We have 2 other children a DD age 7 and another DS age 4.

The bio dad is currently in prison, I am not sure where. He has only met my DS twice in his life once at 4 months old and the last time at 6 years old, the last time bio dad told DS that he would pick him up later that evening to spend time with him, and never showed up because he chose to go to a party instead. As far as I know bio dad agrees to the adoption I haven't spoken to him or known exactly where he was in over a year. Bio dad has never paid a dime in child support, and I am a stay at home mom so 100% of DS' support has been provided by my husband, including medical insurance, dental insurance etc.
Bio dad does not deny that the child is his but bio dad's name is NOT and never has been on the birth certificate, we were never married and he was in jail awaiting trial at the time of DS' birth so was unable to sign. DS carries my maiden name. We currently live in NY, child was born in OK, bio dad is in an OK prison, and my husband is a legal resident of TX. Where do we file the papers? Since bio dad doesn't deny the child is his do we have to go through DNA testing?
Since bio dad is not on the birth certificate do we still have to go through the process of running an ad in the paper? Will the fact that bio dad is serving a 15 year sentence, and won't get out until after DS' 21st birthday complicate things or make it easier?

Once the adoption does go through what is the process to change the birth certificate? Is it automatically changed or do I get to fill out the forms?
I ask this question because I would like for my DS to keep my maiden name as well as my husbands name. When my other 2 children were born I added my maiden name to their full names so that my DS wouldn't feel isolated by being the only one in the family with that name, and I would like to have his name be <name middle maiden husbands> just like my other 2 children. Thank you in advance for any advice or support anybody can share.


Julibras