[cmrnswfee]

My son is 12 and hasn't seen [EDITED]since April of 2000, he recieved termination of parental rights and has filed to contest adoption...does anyone know what we are in for, I am totally oblivious here..Having never gone through this, my husband and I are not sure what to do. Do we sit idly by while he does this?? Our adoption specialist said that when we go for our hearing in front of the judge our son may be able to speak...he is 12 should I let him or should I ask that he go alone with the judge...so many questions...how can after nearly 5 years<and before that he was in prison for 5 years>, a person actually have the nerve to contest anything,,,you would think he would be embarrassed!! I know I would...any help with this would be great oh by the way we live in MI. Thanks for your help...Heather

[BrandyHagz]

I realize you may not hold much respect for your son’s birthfather, but we do require you use some measure of respect here on the forums. Many members of the forums here find the label you used in your post offensive, which is why I removed it. Please keep that in mind next time you post.

Thanks!

[cmrnswfee]

so sorry if I offended anyone, did not mean to I apologize...I meant bdad.

[crystaly]

Originally Posted by cmrnswfee

My son is 12 and hasn't seen [EDITED]since April of 2000, he recieved termination of parental rights and has filed to contest adoption...does anyone know what we are in for, I am totally oblivious here..Having never gone through this, my husband and I are not sure what to do. Do we sit idly by while he does this?? Our adoption specialist said that when we go for our hearing in front of the judge our son may be able to speak...he is 12 should I let him or should I ask that he go alone with the judge...so many questions...how can after nearly 5 years<and before that he was in prison for 5 years>, a person actually have the nerve to contest anything,,,you would think he would be embarrassed!! I know I would...any help with this would be great oh by the way we live in MI. Thanks for your help...Heather

Sounds like you have a pretty cut and dry case..Unless you moved and the dad didn't know where you were. I wouldn't worry so much. Especially since your son is 12 and probably does not know this man. The judge will probably just terminate his rights. Please keep us posted. And good luck!

[cmrnswfee]

We have moved but my telephone number was always listed, I did that on purpose, because no matter what I think of bdad, he is his father...I just worry..thanks for your support

[tgage]

A year ago last December, I adopted my 4 step-children - then 9, 10, 14 and just 16. The two older ones had to sign a concent to the adoption but the judge did talk to all 4 kids (who went to the hearing). We made a celebration day out of it and went to lunch and everything. We even celebrate it each year (well, we did so far this year) as a day when we became a family.

Now, I did the adoption myself and did it under the grounds that the bio-dad abandonded the children. Their bio-dad was served via publication (we had no address on him) and didn't respond in within the required 30 days. There was a case in my state where a bio-dad just showed up for a hearing after the 30 days and was given standing so we were prepared for that in case he did.

But, he never showed up and the adoption with through in like 20 minutes.

It was a very empowering day for my children as they'd put up with lots of emotional abuse from their bio-dad and now it was over. But also, they knew that any other hope of him acting like a dad was over as well... something that they've all expressed sadness over since.

Good luck and let us know how it goes.

Tim

[Colorfulaura]

I would love to hear what is going on. I am in Oakland County and my daughter's bdad is in prison and she doesn't know him at all. She knows of him but only because she has ears like a hawk. She will be 4 in September. We are going to get married before our big shin-dig just to get on the clock seeing he could get out next may and we need to be married 6 months. Do they require a home study?

Anyhow - we are talking to a lawyer next week and seeing where to go. If you have any info I would love to hear from you. I likewise can tell you what our lawyer said.

Thanks and Good Luck

Laura

[cmrnswfee]

In Washtenaw County, they require a home study. It is almost painless though, they just check to see that the child has a rooma nd a bed and things..along with a decent home for the family. Then there is an interview. It is kind of indepth, but painless also. Just make sure you can prove everything you say, support visitation...anything...also judges like paperwork with the facts printed out on them, our judge liked that alot...just make sure you have everything in order...the more prepared you are with facts..the easier things move!!good luck Heather