[hrichard]

I am the bio dad to a 8 yr girl..I was never with her mother and lived away in another state for the first 6 years. I live near her now and saw her off and on for a year about twice a month. I now haven't seen her since Jan 04. Unfortunately I can't get along with the mother at all, and really have never built a bond with daughter either. It is a really tuff situation, for all people invovled. Her mother just got married, and their has been talk of step-dad adopting daughter. I think that will be the best for all parties invovled. However, I don't know how to get the process started....I am in the state of VA...I have contacted the court house and not getting a lot of help...Thanks for any help

[totly8799]

living in IL

When my ex wanted to give up his rights, he could not initiate the adoption process...I had to. Similar to not being able to take your car (loan) back to the bank and say you don't want to make any more payments - the bank only takes back the car when you're not paying.

I would guess in VA it would be the same? your ex-wife would have to start the proceedings. Then you would relinquish.

Hope this gives you direction.

[travsmom]

i sure wish there were more guys like you out there who realize that the main issue is what is best for the child!! thanks for giving me hope!!