[BalesGal]

Please help! I am a twenty two year old gal who has recently married into a family where my husband has two children (10 and 8) that I would dearly love to adopt. Their mother is in the picture ONLY to spite us... she never sees her children; has hit them and abused them mentaly and emotionally since the day they were born. I love these children like they were my own and would NEVER force them to let me adopt them... my husband and I plan to present this option to them when they turn around twelve. What I need is to know is if anyone knows the restrictions put on adopting step children in Oregon, especially if one of the parents does not give consent, yet does not pay child support or contact the children in any way!

Thank you so much!

[lorelei2003]

Hi there! I am a bmom so I have kept up with most laws in most states. First off, the children can decide who they want to live with when they are 11, that is new, at least within the last few years, it used to be 14. Second, without the other parents consent can be tricky, you will need to do some research, like the legal library in your county or city. Sometimes, it is possible to adopt without parental consent. The fact that there is not support for the children and possible abuse should work in your favor if it were to come down to a court hearing. I am not certified in legal laws, but I do know a few things concerning certain state laws. I do not know the laws governing your state, but I suggest you start at the library as it can be very useful. You can also find some websites that are helpful. Wish I could give your more, but I hope it helps.

Good luck!

[Kallen330]

Who needs to consent for adoption in Oregon :

WHO MUST CONSENT: § 109.312
• The parents, or surviving parent.
• A guardian.
• Next of kin.
• A suitable person appointed by the court as next friend of the child.
§ 109.316
• State office or agency to which custody has been surrendered.

CONSENT OF ADOPTEE: § 109.328
• A child 14 years or older must consent to the adoption.

WHEN PARENTAL CONSENT NOT NEEDED: § 109.314; 109.322; 109.324; 109.326
A parent:
• Does not retain custody.
• Is mentally ill or deficient.
• Has been imprisoned more than 3 years.
• Has deserted or neglected the child.
• The mother's husband is found not to be the child's father.

WHEN CONSENT CAN BE EXECUTED: Not addressed in statutes reviewed.

HOW CONSENT MUST BE EXECUTED: § 109.312
• Must be in writing and its validity attested to by the court or an authorized person.
§ 418.270
• A parent may execute consent or surrender to a child placing agency for the purpose of placing the child for adoption by that agency.

REVOCATION OF CONSENT: § 109.312
• Consent may not be revoked unless fraud or duress is proved with respect to any material fact surrounding the adoption procedure.

These are the grounds for Termination of Parental Rights in Oregon:

Statute: §§ 419B.500; 502; 504; 506; 508

Circumstances That Are Grounds for Termination

Abandonment or Extreme Parental Disinterest

Abuse/Neglect

Mental Illness or Deficiency

Alcohol or Drug Induced Incapacity

Failure of Reasonable Efforts

Abuse/Neglect or Loss of Rights of Another Child

Sexual Abuse

Failure to Maintain Contact

Failure to Provide Support

Child's Best Interest

Felony assault of child or sibling

Murder/Manslaughter of sibling child

Circumstances That Are Not Grounds for Termination

Felony Conviction/Incarceration

Failure to Establish Paternity

Child Judged in Need of Services/Dependent

Child in care 15 of 22 months (or less)

Full Text of Statute

Or. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 419B.500 (WESTLAW through Or. 2003 Legis. Serv., Ch. 396)

The parental rights of the parents of a ward may be terminated as provided by law only upon a petition filed by the State or the ward for the purpose of freeing the ward for adoption if the court finds it is in the best interest of the ward. If an Indian child is involved, the
termination of parental rights must be in
compliance with the Indian Child Welfare Act. The
rights of one parent may be terminated without
affecting the rights of the other parent.

Or. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 419B.502 (WESTLAW through Or. 2003 Legis. Serv., Ch. 396)

The rights of the parent or parents may be terminated if the court finds that the parent or parents are unfit by reason of a single or recurrent incident of extreme conduct toward any child. In such case, no efforts need to be made by available social agencies to help the parent adjust the conduct in order to make it possible for the child or ward to safely return home within a reasonable amount of time. In determining extreme conduct, the court shall consider the following:

Rape, sodomy, or sex abuse of any child by the parent;

Intentional starvation or torture of any child by the parent;

Abuse or neglect by the parent of any child
resulting in death or serious physical injury;

Conduct by the parent to aid or abet another
person who, by abuse or neglect, caused the death
of any child;

Conduct by the parent to attempt, solicit, or
conspire to cause the death of any child;

Previous involuntary termination of the parent's
rights to another child if the conditions giving
rise to the previous action have not been
ameliorated;

Conduct by the parent that knowingly exposes any
child of the parent to the storage or production
of methamphetamines from precursors. In
determining whether extreme conduct exists under
this subsection, the court shall consider the
extent of the child or ward's exposure and the
potential harm to the physical health of the
child or ward.

Or. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 419B.504 (WESTLAW through Or. 2003 Legis. Serv., Ch. 396)

The rights of the parent or parents may be terminated if the court finds that the parent or parents are unfit by reason of conduct or condition seriously detrimental to the child or ward and integration of the child or ward into the home of the parent or parents is improbable within a reasonable time due to conduct or conditions not likely to change. In determining such conduct and conditions, the court shall consider, but is not limited to, the following:

Emotional illness, mental illness, or mental deficiency of the parent of such nature and duration as to render the parent incapable of providing proper care for the child or ward for extended periods of time;

Conduct toward any child of an abusive, cruel, or
sexual nature;

Addictive or habitual use of intoxicating liquors
or controlled substances to the extent that parental ability has been substantially impaired
Physical neglect of the child or ward;

Lack of effort of the parent to adjust the circumstances of the parent, conduct, or conditions to make it possible for the child or ward to safely return home within a reasonable time or failure of the parent to effect a lasting adjustment after reasonable efforts by available social agencies for such extended duration of time that it appears reasonable that no lasting adjustment can be effected;

Criminal conduct that impairs the parent's ability to provide adequate care for the child or ward.

Or. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 419B.506 (WESTLAW through Or. 2003 Legis. Serv., Ch. 396)

The rights of the parent or parents may be terminated if the court finds that the parent or parents have failed or neglected without reasonable and lawful cause to provide for the basic physical and psychological needs of the child or ward for 6 months prior to the filing of a petition. In determining such failure or neglect, the court shall disregard any incidental or minimal expression of concern or support and shall consider but not be limited to one or more of the following:

Failure to provide care or pay a reasonable portion of substitute physical care and maintenance if custody is lodged with others;
Failure to maintain regular visitation or other contact with the child or ward that was designed and implemented in a plan to reunite the child or ward with the parent;

Failure to contact or communicate with the child or ward or with the custodian of the child or ward. In making this determination, the court may disregard incidental visitations, communications, or contributions.

Or. Rev. Stat. Ann. § 419B.508 (WESTLAW through Or. 2003 Legis. Serv., Ch. 396)

The rights of the parent or parents may be terminated if the court finds that the parent or parents have abandoned the child or ward or the child or ward was left under circumstances such that the identity of the parent or parents of the child or ward was unknown and could not be ascertained, despite diligent searching, and the parent or parents have not come forward to claim the child or ward within 3 months following the finding of the child or ward.