[LegallyKim]

I wanted to share my daughters story with everyone because it is backwards from everything else I've read. When I was pregnant with my daughter, now 13, the biological father went into denial. We had already broken up, and he was dating someone new when I told him. He even went so far as to do bloodtests. He did pay child support all these years but had never seen our daughter or had anything to do with her. In the meantime, I met a man whom I eventually married and he has been my daughters "daddy". Even after we divorced, he maintained that relationship with her. A couple weeks after her 13th birthday this year, the birthfather sent her a card and a gift certificate. The first communication she had ever received from him, EVER. At first we were all nervous and scepticle. But after several letters, emails and phone calls, I am happy to say that he is turning out to be a blessing to my daughter. Her biological father's wife has played a huge part in getting them together and is excited to have a step-daughter (she has all boys). "Daddy" is still nervous and probably insecure, but he tries to stay supportive of our daughter. She assures him she will always be her "daddy", but that it feels good to know that her birthfather has thought about her and does love her and want her. I've seen nice changes in my daugther, all positive, and she is a very happy person to know that so many people love her.

I know this can't always be the case, in fact its probably rare, but I'm glad that I gave her birthfather a chance to explain to her his side and a chance to be a part of her life. He'll never be her Daddy, but she does consider him family and the hole in her heart is gone. I guess I feel like I've gotten some absolution as well, as I've harbored a huge amount of guilt for bringing her into the world without a daddy - now she has two that love her unconditionally and openly.

[PinkRibbon]

I think that you are such an unselfish, wonderful mother to be able to put your feelings about what's in your daughter's best interest. You set a wonderful example for others. Your daughter is so lucky to have you.

legallykim,

Thank you for relating such a nice situation. It always does everyone good when the childrens feelings are honored. It just goes to show that adults in a situation can and do step aside for the love of their children. My highest regards to you, your ex, birthfather and his wife...best wishes and hope that things continue to go well for your daughter.

Donna

[sue123]

What a wonderful shared story. Congratulations you sound like a wonderful mom. And just remember to keep reassuring daddy that he is the light in her eyes.