[DebraK]

I was divorced from my husband 6 years ago and we are currently reunited and residing together, but not yet remarried. During the divorce years (6 years), I was involved in another relationship and had a child. The BF has not had any contact for the past 3 years -- the only time seeing baby at one day of age. BF's name is not on the birth certificate, nor has paternity been established. No contact, no support, just no contact in any way, shape or form.

My question is, do we have to be remarried or even be married for a certain time frame before adoption can take place? He wants to adopt, and we've only been in the talking phase of remarriage sometime in the future.

Can this be done without the assistance of an attorney? I've called a few and they are rather pricey. We were initially just going to go for a last name change, but I know this needs to be taken care of legally as well. In our state, 1 year with no contact at all constitutes termination of parental rights.

I've tried looking on the net for any type of information, but have come up with no concrete answers.

Thanks for any help anyone might give!
Deb

[Eventually]

In step-parent adoptions, you need to be married and the amount of time married depends on the state. In some states, it is 6 months and in others, it is 2 years. Even though the bio-father isn't listed on the birth certificate, he will still have to be notified about the adoption and paternity will probably have to be established. He can even contest it if he so wishes. We just finished our step-parent adoption less than a year ago and we used a lawyer. It doesn't seem as if your case would be so cut and dry because of the birth certificate/paternity issue and you might want to at least consult with an attorney.

[DebraK]

but waiting on another attorney to get back in town next week to get his opinion.

In our state, my ex and I do not need to be married and the attorney said the BF did not have to be notified because of the length of time since any type of contact aka abandonment. He said it would be 'nice' to 'try' to contact the BF just to cover all bases, but the judge in our county might consider automatic termination of parental rights due to the time frame that has passed since BF last had any contact. That, coupled with the fact that he wanted his parental rights terminated, might make things go easier.

Now the biggest obstacle is coming up with some funds.

Thank you very much for your help.

[Eventually]

I wish I lived in your state! In my case, the bio-father had no contact at all for 6 years, plus he was in prison from crimes against the very children his rights were being terminated on, but we still had to notify him. And of course, he objected, but that's another story. I find it strange that a lawyer told you that you didn't have to be married. Of all the research I have done online, I never came across any state that allows that. Even on a legal messageboard which I post at, all the lawyers there say you can't get a step-parent adoption done without being married. Go figure. But if that is how it is in your state...good for you...it will make things easier. Plus if the bio-father consents, that's even better.

[DebraK]

West Virginia Adoption Statute Summary

West Virginia Code Sections 48-4-1 to 48-4-15 and 48-4A-1 to 48-4A-8 (1997)

Who Can Adopt?
Any single person or married person either with his or her spouse jointly or with his or her spouse's consent can adopt.

Who Can Be Adopted?
Any person can be adopted.

Consent to Adoption
The following parties must give written consent to the adoption:
1. both natural parents;
2. the adjudicated or outsider father who has filed a paternity action when the adoption petition is filed;
3. the legal guardian or the court, if there is no parent or the parent does not have custody;
4. If the parent is under 18 years of age the court must review and approve the consent and appoint a guardian ad litem;
5. the determined father;
6. The adoptee if 12 years or older
A parent's consent is not necessary if
1. his or her parental rights have been terminated;
2. he or she is disabled because of age; or
3. he or she is incurably insane.
Notice of the adoption shall also be given to any putative or unknown father who has exercised parental duties to the child and who has not had his parental rights terminated, unless the child is more than 6 months old and the father has not asserted his parental rights.

Consent, if given within 72 hours after birth, may be revoked within 10 days after the birth of the child. No consent may be revoked otherwise, except if given under fraud or duress.

Confidentiality
All records in adoption cases shall be kept in a sealed file and are not open to inspection except upon a court order.

Medical and social information and other nonidentifying information shall be included in the adoption record and shall be sealed by the court. This nonidentifying information may be provided to the adoptive parent and the adoptee upon request to the court.

The State shall establish a mutual consent voluntary adoption registry. Identifying information about either the adoptee or the biological parents may only be released if both the parent and the adult adoptee consent to the release of such information or upon court order for good cause shown. The adoption registry will attempt to match the adult adoptee and the birth parents whenever possible, with the consent of all parties.

Permissible Fees
No person must knowingly receive, accept or offer to accept money or anything of value in consideration for locating, providing, or procuring a minor child for any purpose which entails transfer of legal or physical custody including but not limited to adoption. Fees may be paid for reasonable and customary services performed by a licensed or authorized child placing agency. Expenses may also be paid with respect to reasonable and customary legal, medical,
hospital or other expenses or any fees as authorized by law or approved in court relating to the placement of a minor for adoption.

Place of Adoption Hearing
The adoption hearing shall take place in the court of the county where the adoptive parents reside.

Authority To Place Child
Any public or voluntary organization licensed or approved pursuant to the laws of any jurisdiction within the United States is authorized to place a child. Within West Virginia, any child welfare agency licensed to place children by the State Department of Human Services may place a child.

Relative Adoption
The preadoption report required before a person can adopt a child is not required in the case of a relative adoption. Proximity of age cannot be the sole basis for a denial of an adoption in the case of a stepparent adoption.

Re-printed with permission from the National Adoption Information Clearinghouse.