[ginaanddon]

5 years ago I became pregnant by someone who abadonded me and his unborn child because I would not have an abortion. He is an abusive man who already had 3 other children. When I was 4 months pregnant, me and my friend of 6 years started dating. We were together through delivery and he even cut the umbilical cord. Now 4 years after her birth we are married and he is her Daddy. She is not aware that he isn't her BF. I have now become pregnant with my second child. This has really made him want to adopt. Yet neither of us know where to start. We thought about doing a name change and we do plan on doing that, but he wants more. I feel like I shouldn't have to contact her BF and I fear that he won't sign any paperwork just because it is what I want and that he will then try and get some type of rights to her. I have always said that if he came back in to our lives that I would allow him to visit her at MY house until a judge said otherwise, but now I don't think he would be healthy for her. He is now a drug addict.
He has never seen her. He has never tried to see her. He hasn't contacted me since I found out he was arrested a year or so ago for a drug problem. He was requesting I bring her to the jail to see him. Of course I said no and told him to contact me when he was out of jail. He has been out for 11 months and we still haven't heard from him. Where should we start? Should I just do name change? There is no father on the birth certificate, does that make a difference?

[vicrose]

I would definitely contact an attorney and get some good advice before proceeding with any actions...because you wouldn't want her bio dad having any control over the situation after the fact....Sincerely, Brenda....