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Originally Posted By barki

Warning! Depression Hazard! Read at your own risk. )

I'm so FRUSTRATED trying to get something in place academically (or for any other area) for the one foster son. I'm going to go gray, crazy and/or bald with stomach ulcers. Gripe gripe, whine whine. I'm not sure what he specifically needs yet since diagnostic testing is one of the things I can't seem to ever quite get done in the right time frame and for the right problem areas. I can't seem to get things in place for what he may need because of the need for funding, or we can't figure out what the proper program is, or we don't have the proper program in our area. Then to top it all off there doesn't seem to be a way to enforce anything once it's in place and he returns to bio family. Grrrr.

I do have to say, in my defense, that I can't administer the tests and I have to wait on the school district to get many of these things done, but I seem to spend alot of time prompting and reminding and STILL not getting anywhere!

I also found out that the school has no specific GPA requirements for 8th grade promotion, and there are only subjective requirements for a student either being promoted or held back. Also, "according to the handbook", parents are not required to be part of the subjective process of deciding whether or not a child is promoted or held back.

So let's say the homeroom teacher gets a kink in his/her tail and doesn't really like a particular child, they can request that this child be considered as a candidate to not be promoted. If this teacher can appeal to enough of the other teachers they can keep the child back another year. On the flip side, a child who is ok behaviorally but abysmal on the academic front could be promoted anyway. Or a behavior problem with inferior academics could be moved on to the next grade, etc. etc. There are no hard and fast requirements, only that, subjectively speaking, everyone (except, of course, the parents) thinks it is ok for this kid to move on to high school. My blood pressure is rising, must go get a glass of water and an aspirin.

Oh, dear. I've got to come up with something non-pessimistic to end with. Hmmm, well...the sun did shine here yesterday. It's raining today, but I know the sun will shine again. I can only do what I am able and then let it rest. God gives me the ability to do what He requires and oversees all of it for me, so I'm not REALLY going to go gray over this, but sometimes it sure feels like a distinct possibility! )

[Archive]

Originally Posted By Jerry

I'll just leave you with the Mother Terresa saying I read on another board................which is soooo appropriate!!!

"I know God won't give me more than I can deal with, I just wish he didn't trust me so much!!"

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I share the frustration with the school and will sneak in and "borrow" your support. I am still trying to get copies of assessments done on my son 1 year ago. They were done to test him out of OT. Supposively my son, with a severe sensory integration disorder tested at a 12 year level on some measures (he was 8 at the time). He's now in outpatient OT with an awesome therapist and making great progress.

In talking over the test the school OT described to me, it seems that they probably tested him on his only SI related strength (visual motor). My hypothesis - either they know so little about SI that they did not know how to read and interpret the SIPT that they had in their possession at that time. OR alternative hypothesis - they wanted to dump a kid who was a royal pain in their rump!

We are probably heading for court. Next year my son will have 4 different teachers - so no more messing around. THey either put his needs into his service contract or we go to court. I'm in the process of trying to find an education law attorney who does not have a conflict of interest. Education Law Center states we have the right to demand what we are asking for our son, but they just give verbal advise, nothing in writing.

So vent away - I too share in your frustration. Ok all together now 1...2...3... ARRRGGGGHHHHH!

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Originally Posted By barki

to know that my FS doesn't really have any major problems, that he "just" needs stability and lots of supervision in order to train him how to study and to make up some of the educational gaps. I don't know what I'd be doing if he actually had a major problem with severe issues. I can't imagine trying to get services in place! I've been working on getting diagnositic testing done since January (!!) and we are now to the point that this will make NO difference for this year at all. I've been told that we are "establishing a base-line for the years to come". I'm saying it with you, DimasMom! "ARRRRRRRRGGGHH!"

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My son is on grade level, so the school does not recognize his disabilities. He's great at pretending everything is fine and stuffing his frustration inside where noone can see it (I think this is common with neglected/abused children?). SO they see OK school work, and don't see frustration, so they don't feel the need to accomodate. Most of what my son needs in accomodations is really little stuff, mostly for his sensory integration disorder and a few things for mild bipolar.

Teacher just wrote me yesterday to ask what his new medication is "because he is doing so well" School OT just did their 1X month check on him and was "impressed with his progress". He's back on same medication he's been on for the entire school year except Feb/early March when we did a trial on another med.

Teacher is coming on board (every year it takes 6 - 9 months to get teacher to understand what I have been saying since Sept). She finially is permitting him to address his need for oral stimulation whenever he feels the need. He has a small container of tangy/sweettart/sour type candies that he sucks on whenever he feels like he needs to. This just started after Easter break. I'm hoping they will draw the parallel between accomodating disabilities and improvements and not try to tie it to something out of their control like medications (hes been back on other med since mid march).

Teachers are easier to get on board. Generally after they spend several months with my son, they see the wisdom in my words. School coordinator for special ed is another matter. She refuses to accept that my son has any disabilities at all. She actually told me this point blank. To quote her "There is absolutely nothing wrong with your son. I don't know why you keep asking for these things. He doesn't need them and he doesn't want the things you are asking for". This is the woman that refuses to put his needs into his 504 service contract. Teacher has said she will back me up for at least the oral stim needs - but he has several other issues, that likewise just need minor accomodations. Hopefully she'll support me there too. Teacher and I meet on Friday to talk over ideas for next year. Will go from there. Wish me luck!!

 

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As you said, you can only do what you are able. And you have done all that you have control over. I know it is so frustrating, but remember to turn those things that you can't control over to Him, and He will take care of them. Hugs and prayers your way. Those boys are so blessed to have you in their corner!