[ajjhmf]

I thought an update thread might be fun. Let's hear how those kids are doing.

H, 5, has finally adjusted to NOT going to Kindergarten. She is learning to read and write at preschool and at home with me though. She's also stopped using training wheels, has definite opinions on how the world should work and is, in general, a real joy to be around.

J, 10.5, is starting to have some success at school. We're rewritten and amended his IEP a few times this year. Although he doesn't fit in a SCC, he also really struggles in reg. ed. SO, we came up with a plan that never leaves him in his reg. ed. classroom having to do independent work. His time with his IS has increased and he is now a part of a reading program for LD kids where he gets 1-1 tutoring by volunteers. He's happier, we're happier and the school is happier that he has stopped wandering the halls to avoid being in class.

M, 3.5, is making great progress in OT on his SPD. However, at conferences his teachers noted that he has been "spacing out" at various times during class. A few phone calls later, our doctor is concerned he may be having absence seizures. The EEG was done yesterday and our doctor's appointment is Tuesday. the technician told me she saw some abnormal activity, but couldn't say what it was. The concern is that he may have a form of epilepsy, but we are really too early in the process to tell. So now, we wait.

What's up with everyone else?

[Barksum]

Glad to hear the update, Jenny! Particularly glad that J has been able to get into a program at school that is working for him and meeting his particular needs.

Sorry to hear about the testing for M. Sorry in that it means another thing to work through, but glad that it is being addressed. Think how much you've grown since your first child arrived and how much knowledge you now have about all kinds of things you never even knew existed before you became a parent.

I'm booking a nervous breakdown sometime in the near future. Life is...abundant. Abundant not only in blessings, but daily overwhelmednesses. (Seriously...the kids don't know how to hang up their coats or put their shoes on the shoe trays by the front door. How sad is that? And then we have the huge issues such as my 11 yo old breaking down into tears of frustration and rage over the 4 yo wiggling her fingers at him. ?! Then the flip side to that: dealing with a 4 yo who has found that her older brother has certain buttons that she can push to make him go ballistic. ) Things are going along on an even keel; that is, we have about 50/50 with ups and downs. I guess any roller coaster could even out if you averaged the ups and downs!

[kretzklan]

Things here swing wildly everyday.
DS1 is typical teen...moody and pretty sure that we are the stupidest people on earth most of the time. However, he still likes a cuddle before bed (or even being 'tucked in') and is doing great in school. Stretching his wings...very normal.
DS2 is overall doing well. He's not a daily 'issue' maker anymore. He is still not enamored with school and doesn't see the value in participating in class - but grades are middle of the road and that may be the best it can be...so letting that stress go. He is becoming angry much more and much quicker...so we are working on that both behaviorally and medically. Don't know enough family history to let it work itself out...it seems a bit over the top.
DD is a bit of a bugger lately. Just very unhappy and would like to make everyone else feel that way also...even more unhappy when we don't follow her lead. I sincerely believe it's bi-polar, but can't get a doc to diagnose it or treat it as such. Got the doc reccommendation for in-patient program...in order to monitor her constant threats of harm to herself and others...and to get her meds straight. I'm dragging my heels big time right now...will have to learn more soon, I'm sure. Grades are great and she is active!

[Kerbchek]

J's adjusting to high school ok... he had some pretty low grades at conferences... He still has an IEP, but isn't in all self-contained classes anymore, the work load is more than he's used to, and he's not a big fan of school work, but he's bringing more work home, and his grades are improving...

As far as M, the 5 year old we're matched with... the ICPC process is taking FOREVER. Apparently, our state forwarded the ICPC approval on November 3, so M's worker should be getting the paperwork very soon from their ICPC office... hopefully. We can then plan our first visit and hopefully set up a time-line so I can start getting services into place. I've already talked to the school and when the ICPC approval stuff is in the worker's hand, the school can request records from his current school and hopefully find just the right classroom for him here. I already have lined up before and after daycare at an exceptional children's daycare center in town, and have had a meeting with the person who will probably be his ID-Waiver (formerly MR-Waiver) caseworker... apparently his adoption needs to be finalized before we can start to receive those services, but there's no reason to not be prepared.

Hopefullly we can start moving forward on getting him home soon... apparently he's doing well and attentively looked through the photo cards we sent out there a few weeks ago of our house and family... He's turning six this month.

[Mkuhlmann06]

R - Minus the finalization situation, she's really blossomed in the 9 months with us. Huge improvements in the past 3 months. She's carrying almost straight As, isn't being as big of a queen of drama as she was, and is getting along with T quite well. Altho she is our youngest, she is our most mature.

T - He's slipped back into some not so good behaviors. He's been lying about HW (saying he did it when he didn't or saying he didn't have any), has had a Christmas present removed and has had to write a large number of sentences. He is showing signs of anger over little stuff, which is not like him and hopefully is just hormones. He's adjusted much better to H's placement than he did when R first came. He told me that this year he's not going to write his biomom a letter like he usually does, because she never wrote him back. He's doing slightlly better in school, grade wise, but I know he's not doing his full potential.

H - Well, its been a bumpy month and I predict will continue to be so for another 5. She's expecting us to do all the same things all her previous families have to her...so its really going to take some time for her to see that we really are different. She just started reading the driver's manual for her permit and hopefully she'll get that after Xmas.

[Lylac]

Things around here have been busy. We are finally finished with half of our house remodel and looking forward to a break til after the holidays.

All 4 kids have nasty noses and a cough here and there, but are doing great otherwise.

We just had Nates IEP revision. Lyla, Bremon and Nate "were" all in the same classroom. But apparently having another child in a wheelchair(Nate can walk, but needs one for transportation) was just TOO much for the teacher and 2 aides. So now Nate is in another class..Sp Ed preschool class, even though he's in Kindy. Thing is pre-school only goes 4 days a week. So on Fridays he goes back to class with L & B..with an aide (from his other class, that normally doesn't have to work on Fridays) to take care of him..CRAZY???? Uh huh!

I do like that he gets to walk around more in the pre-school class, and dev is with peers closer to his age.

Tim is still having problems with his knee replacement. He's seein a pain management doc now, and his Ortho here is sending him back to Nashville to see the surgeon that did it. They are talking about redoing it..Tims saying..well I can't say here what he's saying. And I can't say I blame him. Especially when there's NO guarantees that a new one will be any better.

Thats about it for us.

Jenny I hope things turn out good for M. The waiting and not knowing is the hardest.

[arkansas parent]

Not much going on with us.
DD (13) is a know it all teenager. She is currently grounded for having bad grades. But on a good note she has been less moody.

T (6) has great grades and loves to read. He has discover a love for drawing. We are in the process of getting him dianoised with ADHD and possible something else. (maybe some kind of defiant disorder)

Baby A (almost 17 mo) is keeping me busy. He is super smart and gets into everything. He is the sweetest baby, but he has a temper and likes to bite.

I am getting over a nasty chemical (bleach) burn on my arm and hand. I guess I should have left the mold on the siding.

Overall we are doing great. No one has been sick. No major behavoir problems. It has been rather boring.

[o2b30again]

Things going well here at our house...

14- In every extracurricular activity possible and still getting good grades

12-Making really good progress dealing with his Auditory Process Disorder that we just had dx this last year. Growing like a weed and making really good grades.

8- She is really doing great in school. She is making friends and more importantly keeping them She is enjoying working on her lifebook with me.

6- He is doing fantastic in school! We were really worried he wouldn't be able to keep up because of his FASD and Auditory Processing Issues but he is doing well. He is well liked by his peers and the teacher really likes him

5- M is having a hard time focusing this year. School actually asked if we would accept a one on one aid....ummmm....YES! He isn't naughty just all over the place. Though this doesn't affect him learning it is still a huge distraction.

4- H is meeting all his EBD IEP goals! YIPPEE!! Now we are just fighting with the school to start more Kindergarten readiness skills.

3- A is working on Potty training. She is doing well and I am hoping that this time it will be a success. We can't figure out if it is her RAD and not going because I want her to or her sensory issues and that she actually doesn't know when she has to go. Never thought I needed a psych degree to figure out potty training She also is now attending some Preschool and really enjoys it

1- A is doing well now that we have found most of her triggers of her PTSD under control. Her hair is growing back and she is starting to shut down less. She is gaining weight daily and is becoming such a big girl!

Well that is us in a nutshell. Between therapy sessions, iep meetings and doctors appointments we still are making time for all the other activities that life provides.

[crick]

My life is boring too I think. I drive to this sport and that sport, back home to feed, pick up this kid and drop off that kid at band and, and, and. Oh ya...there's homework and projects and and and. Nothing like 7th grade math to make me feel utterly and completely stupid. I kid you not. Oh heck..I have difficulty with 5th grade math, who am I kidding? And in science, did you know you can make diamonds from peanuts? Huh. WHERE was I in school??? Or is it simply as I approach $0, my mind is just not able to remember anything prior to yesterday and even that is a challenge???

At any rate, things are going well and we are keeping busy!

[AmyAnne]

Austin's doing pretty well. He lost a bunch of privilleges however, because he keeps leaving doors unlocked. I took all electronics from him for a week so he could see what it'd be like if they were stolen during a robbery. I've told him if it happens again, it'll be TWO weeks next time. The nice thing is, we've played a LOT more board games this week! Had him home with a headache on Monday, but he seems better now. School's going okay, for him being in 7th. I remember 7th grade being a really rough year. This is the first year we've left him in charge of homework and so far I have not gotten a note from the teachers and he's only gotten one homework demerit. He's playing soccer, but the coach this year is not the best we've ever had, so I am hoping for a different one next year.

My father has been put in a rehabilitation facility, after being hospitalized. My mother had to make this decision after he was unable to get from his wheelchair to the bed. She has issues of her own and is physically unable to lift him. They're 1,000 miles away so this is really hard on me.

My cats have been sick on and off all month, leading me to give up on commercial cat food and just cook for them. Seriously, this is ridiculous.

DH is doing okay but doesn't like his job and has been having a lot of migraines lately.

I am loving the new clogging group I joined. I managed to screw up my back on Weds, so I have not been functioning at full power for the past 2 days.

[momraine]

Ok lets see,
S16- is having trouble in school, partly due to late night conversations with his girlfriend and partly what the docs think might be a chemical imbalance or sleep disorder. So we are making the rounds of doctors with him. He and gf are grounded from phone and computer contact by both parents because both had grades drop after late night conversations. They live two hours apart, so they are having a tough time with it. He is still enjoying his job. Marching season with him as drum major ended after they went as far as they could go in competition and won second place in the statewide contest. He was very happy about that. He has realized that college is coming and working on getting ready, we are hoping he can get his grades up to get into the school he wants.

W14- was in the same band as his brother, so he is also happy about thier win. He is taking ag and home ec (though they call it something else) and had to drop athletics to have room in his schedule. He is in advanced math and still dancing. He has dropped the hard hip hop high school class he was in, so is now doing only ballet, tap, jazz and clogging. He is also in a boys only class that has his older brother and a couple other boys, they are trying lots of different types of dance. He is getting good grades and is very popular with other kids. He is going on his first deer hunt tomorow with a friend and his dad.

P10 - She is still homeschooling, though we plan to send her back to public school next year for sixth grade. We may then have to cut back on her dance schedule. She is doing, pointe, ballet, jazz, tap, clogging, hip hop and a solo class. All of her classes are high school level classes. She also will be doing some charity performances this year. She is in children's choir at church as well as a girls group. Her homeschooling is tough on both of us, the curriculum is tough and we are often up late finishing work. I am trying to get her tested for learning disabilities, but it's very slow going.

M9- is doing better right now because he has a sub at school. His sub is harder on him so he is now doing his work correctly. His teacher has been out for a couple of weeks, so she is pretty sick. We will see how he does when she comes back. He had been donig things like not putting his name on his paper, skipping questions on worksheets, or purposely putting wrong answers. She felt sorry for him and let him get away with it. The sub counts off on each thing doesn't give him any pity, so he stopped! He still gets in trouble for talking all the time and is still lying a lot. He is eating just enough to get by, he is not growing at all. Three years ago this month we got him and he weighed 26lbs, now he hovers around 28. We have decided to just let it go and this time he is holding it. Last time we tried to let it go he dropped down to 23 and was pretty sick. Anyway, when he tries he gets good grades. We are letting him do choir and the boys group this year so far not too many problems.

Dh and I are teaching children's choir and tenth grade SS and are now on a board for one of special needs camps our kids go to. We also help occasionally with other things at church.

Little sis, whom some of you remember lived with us for a year with her two little girls is thinking about coming back this summer, but she won't live with us this time. We will help her get an apartment nearby. When we talked about charging rent she moved back to live with her ex sil and her husband. They were letting her live in their garage apartment rent free. The only price was the wanted control of her social life and she had to go back to thier religion. (she lived with them before living with me and had joined thier religion) She and I were also having disagreements on disclipline issues with the kids. Hers had far fewer rules than mine. That was tough being in the same house, especially since I was taking care of them while she worked.
Anyway, when she went back, things were Ok for almost a year, then the guy kicked his wife out and tried to get little sis to move in with him. When she said no, he kicked her out too. So now the two women are in an apartment together. The ex sil, doesn't work, she got some settlement for faking a back injury in a car wreck (she admits it was fake) so she can't work. However little sis is getting tired of supporting her. (irony huh?) and now the sil is having, um, "dates" with her husband. Thier religion has told the sil that it's her fault she didn't keep her husband happy and she is being discliplined. So, little sis wants nothing more to do with that religion. Anyway, she now says she was dumb to move away and she should have listened to me more. Her girls are getting older now, third grade and first and she is realizing that giving into them all time has not been a good plan. So we shall see.

[kay]

It's kind of roller-coastery here of late. C is on the whole doing pretty well, supposedly only 3 more weeks of high school and he'll have enough credits to graduate. Still no job; he's talking about the Naval Reserve. If they'd take him I think it would be great for him. Right now, though - he didn't come home last night, and I have no idea where he is or if he's ok. His girlfriend doesn't know either. Odds are that he's fine, but . . . we weren't hassling, when I talked to him after my work he sounded positive and good. I'm trying to be really hands-off with the school, so I'm resisting the impulse to call and check on him there, and it's way too soon for an "adult" (HA!) missing persons report or to call around to the police and hospitals. I do worry, and pray that I'm just overreacting.

My Mom is doing "as well as can be expected" - back in the assisted living facility and not needing my constant oversight (so I'm only making the 3 hour each way trip every other weekend, not every!) But she is fading, slowly but noticeably. It's really hard - I can't at all imagine living without her, but in a real way, who she is is already leaving. I know Lucy's dealing with this too, and two more of my friends. It helps a little knowing I'm not alone in this struggle - and in another way it doesn't help at all!

Work is crazed. Old boss retiring, someone else moving up, restructuring and changes all over - and lots of closed doors and whispering because nothing is official yet. I'm just hoping to still be employed at the end of it all, because while I'm closing in on retirement, I sure don't want it to be enforced, and right now!!

Church stuff continues to be fulfilling. Back to singing in the choir, and in a sextet for Christmas, and leading our Community Ministries committee, so the fun of organizing our outreach and giving activities. I am richly blessed by my church family.

Also richly blessed by you all here - met and unmet!

[Perfect7]

Well, our son has officially dropped the autism dx and has a diagnosis of schizophrenia by a neuropsychiatrist, childhood onset schizophrenia by another psychiatrist, and a diagnosis of schizophreniform by the psychologist. So he's schizo-something. We're still fighting for medicaid to approve residential and are now in the second phase of the appeal with them...going to the State level. Our local DFACS is now involved, and our son is away for a week of respite. We SO needed it. We did pick him up for awhile today, though, and went to a park together. I couldn't help it. My stress level is down and we remain hopeful he'll get treatment.

[lucyjoy]

Life here is interesting as ever.

S(12), after spending 3 days ISS for stealing has 3 days OSS for racial slurs and violation of the hate crime policy. Not sure HOW a child can live in my house and have this attitude or where he picked the term he kept calling his teacher this morning but he will be stacking wood this weekend while I decide how to calmly educate him. He returns to school Wed-same day as his IEP meeting.

D(18) left home over a month ago and I've not heard from him once. He has talked to two of his brothers so I know he is fine.

T(19) has not been heard from in more then a year.

RA(20) has decided his life of house jumping(going on 4 years now) is not satisfying and went to talk with the marines but decided he likes what the army has to offer better. He went with me to my mom's today to use the computer to work on his math skills so he can score well on his test.

RU(20) returned from Iraq and is stationed in Ga. He blew out his knee again last week. He was told he needed surgery before leaving for Iraq so guess he'll have to get that soon.

M(21) after paying over $10,000 to clear up his legal problems has decided he should follow the states traffic laws. (He's a bit hard headed). He's working 2 part time jobs, both with the same company, oddly. He has gotten to see his 5 month old daughter a few times and is still trying to get child support/custody/visitiation worked out. Seems the court wants lots of paperwork and paternity stuff before they will take his money for child support.

Mouse(21) is currently in Kuwait doing a retraining to join a different unit already in Iraq. He will be there until Sept but does not have a current address at this time.

B(25) seperated from K and left baby A(4) with K.

C(26) is living with his uncle and still struggling with his schizephrenia.

As Kay mentioned, dealing with my aging parents. My mother's memory continues to fade, though today was a good day. My father is having serious issues with walking. I am spending as much time as I can helping out.

My consignment shop and breakfast cafe is not making me rich but keeping me occupied and I meet the most interesting people. My husband has not worked since January and it's not looking much like he will be working any time soon.

Hoping 2010 is nice and dull.

[joskimo]

my oldest daughter age 15, the one who doesn't need an IEP, is failing high school. She is just the best daughter except for her academics. It's a real dilema to us.

my youngest daughter, H age 4 with ADHD and Sensory is needing a med adjustment, she's very out of whack. Activity level is way high, attention way low, had her first full-on meltdown this school year, tipped tables and book shelves. I saw the teacher later, she looked shell-shocked. She must be new to SPED because she told me she never thought she'd have to restrain a preschooler. Welcome to my world.

Our match, T age 7 moves in with us on Monday. He's ADHD and ODD - I suspect he's RAD too. I have suppports in place at school, meet w/ tx team next week. Will be advocating for attachment therapy right off the bat. Hoping that my little one-horse town offers it, in the meantime I'm reading "Parenting the Hurt Child" and am finding that the techniques for a RAD kid work pretty well for my youngest daughter w/ ADHD and SI.