[Perfect7]

Everyone please forgive my rant. My son had to go to a "core provider" today for screening for RTF at the written request of both his psychiatrist and psychologist, with documentation of hallucinations at home and school with sexualized behavior. Dh was in even more rare form and the assessment team said he needed immediate RTF. He was hallucinating all over their office, defiant, yelling, screaming, etc. Everyone agrees he needs help quickly and intensively, and we're now awaiting medicaid approval (5-7 days).
Now the catch. All of the residential treatment facilities they suggested DO NOT TAKE ANYONE WITH AN IQ UNDER 70! He's never cooperated for IQ testing so we have no number to give, but it's somewhere in the mild/moderate border.
Alas, I found one that takes children with developmental delays as well as psychological issues. They just don't accept medicaid and want $172/day. They told me to call post adoption services for some sort of funding.
I finally reached someone at post adoption services who referred me to their website. The website listed psychiatric facilities and none of them accept kids. So I ended up back where I started from.
I'm trying to get help for a child that the system ignored for years and there's nowhere to turn. This is horrible! What do they expect us to do? Everyone agrees this kiddo needs intensive intervention but nobody can give it to him. The psychologist wrote a letter saying he is above her level of treatment.
My next phone call will be to the county that placed him to tell them they can either find us someone who can help this child or they can come get him! I know, I'm a horrible mother. No trophy for me this year, though God knows I'm trying everything I know to do. I apologize for the drama and I expect I'll get flamed for this one, but somehow writing this all made me feel better.
There's always tomorrow.

[kay]

Flamed? For doing everything you know how to do to help your seriously ill son? I sure hope you're wrong about that! I also hope someone can pull a rabbit out of the hat for you, and quickly. You know, this isn't the first time this has happened - wouldn't you think agencies would have a list of places that have been approved and are helpful, so that each parent, while under unbelievable stress, doesn't have to re-invent the wheel?

So so sorry.

[lucyjoy]

How old is your son? Not sure what state you are working with but post adoption likes to give parents the run around in my state but when I took the information back to them, the list of refusals from calls I made etc, they agreed to payment. I only located one facility willing to take low IQ with psych issues as well. It's not an easy task.

[Perfect7]

Our son is 10, which is another barrier I've encountered. Some don't want to take anyone under 12. I'm thinking post adoption services are like the "Wizard of Oz". Once you pull the curtain back, there's nothing there. I've got a long list of facilities with big lines drawn through them and comments for why they wont take him, so I'll keep it and drive to his old cw's office. I have found one facility now that accepts M.R. on a "case by case basis" so I've again faxed all of his reports over and we should hear something by Monday.
If that doesn't work, I'm just going to check myself in somewhere instead and I'm gonna ask for the "good stuff". Thank you all for listening. It was just one of those days. Nothing a stiff margarita can't cure.
I figured out the post adoption services website only lists psychiatric facilitites for adults because they know WE are the ones who will need it the most, ha ha.

[Peggy]

I had to take my dd to the emergency room, where they assessed her and kept her until a bed "opened up". Then the mental hospital kept her until a bed in a residential facility opened up. Both times they did the looking. Of course it was not that smooth a transition and she was kept for a long time in both places. Keep nagging post adoptive services, they are slow and unwilling, but should eventually be of some help. There should be a list of facilities floating (on the internet or with a social worker) around that works with DCF.

[linda512]

If you are really worried he is a danger to himself or others, bring him to the emergency room (preferably a pediatric ER) and they will have to find someplace for him. Good luck.

[Perfect7]

Thank you everyone. He's not a danger to anybody else right now that we are aware of. He makes threats (waves his fists, etc) but does not follow through. He tried to attack a girl in his class Tuesday but that was a first and the teacher/aids stopped him before he got to her. As he gets bigger and older it may escalate, but I'm hoping this intervention now will really help him. Right now it's just a lot of anger, defiance, and psychosis going on. while he's in RTF you can betcha I'm going to harp on post adoption services and learn all I can. It's doubtful his problems will magically go away while he's gone and he's going to need more than what he's been getting when he gets home. Thank you all for understanding. Today was much better and I'm less frazzled with a light at the end of the tunnel.