I am ticked off beyond all belief!! (X-posted)

AmyAnne · #1 06-03-2008, 09:19 AM

I'm sorry but I am TICKED OFF. It is 10:45 in the morning and I already have a stress headache courtesy of my child.

So he started off the morning by asking Jeff's permission to take his new watch to school. Jeff said no because he plays with his watch during class, and today is the review for the Science Final, and also the watch is too big for his wrist so it won't stay on. Later, I catch him sneaking it in his pocket. I put it in his room. When I went in to vacuum... you guessed it. NO WATCH. He lied to me about not having it back in his pocket.

He also tried to sneak 3-4 items to school in his bookbag. (You may only take one non-school-related item to school and you must have permission to take it.)

Then I notice under the bed, the notebook I told him he could not have last night (He's got like 6 notebeooks where he's written on the first 3 pages so I would not let him take yet another one. I keep a supply of spiral notebooks on hand)

THEN I notice that there's money missing from the bookshelf in my bedroom. it was money he had lost that was supposed to be donated to church as a consequence, and he just stole it right back.

chickymum · #2 06-03-2008, 09:32 AM

Oh sooo fun. I totally know how you feel. It is so frustrating when they don't even give you time in between their actions to let you deal with and get over the previous action. AAARRGGHH.

AmyAnne · #3 06-03-2008, 09:56 AM

Yeah, he's lucky he's at school and I have (checks watch) 3 hours and 15 minutes to calm down enough that I don't go on a screaming tirade when he walks in the door.

Right now I'm grumpy enough to, bite the head off a puppy or something.

kay · #4 06-03-2008, 10:52 AM

Ohhh, sorry Amy. I can so relate!!!
Sympathy and hugs.

missw005 · #5 06-03-2008, 11:49 AM

Yikes, Amy!!! A's crap is just neverending today!!!

to you, my friend. At least you still have 3 kid-free hours to settle back a bit...........and plan your devious revenge.....I mean consequences.

When is A done with school? J and Q's last day is today.

Then we have 2 weeks at home before J's summer counseling group starts, and I am sooooooooo not looking forward to that!
I hope you have a couple weeks left before he's home full-time. What are your sanity/safety/anxiety-free plans for him for the summer?

You know, if your lawn is dandelion filled, he could surely use a spoon and dig each and every one of them up. Or cut the lawn with scissors............

I hope things get better for you very soon. If not, find chocolate. Or ice cream. Or ice cream with chocolate. And whipped cream. And hot fudge. And sprinkles. Then eat it in front of him and say this treat is just for those who tell the truth and follow the rules................

to you, Amy, you can do it!!!!!!!!

Sandy

AmyAnne · #6 06-03-2008, 12:06 PM

I am down to one hour before kiddo arrives home. I have two bottles of beer in the fridge so they'll be nice and cold after he's asleep tonight. DH has a stash of dark chocolate around here someplace which I know he will break into (It's the emergency stash he keeps to give me on occasions such as this) and then I am taking a hot bath and watching Hell's Kitchen tonight.

My plan is as follows: Meet kiddo at the door and demand the watch be handed over. (So he cannot sneak it into his room and claim I did not see it). He will stay within eyesight of me of Jeff until it is returned or we BOTH go to his room and he finds it. He will then be asked to return the money he stole. We will study for the test and THEN I will hand down consequences.

missw005 · #7 06-03-2008, 12:22 PM

You go, girl!!!!!! You

!

lucyjoy · #8 06-03-2008, 12:57 PM

Just an outside observation-will this throw kiddo into a rage and a huge control battle? I know one of mine it would and the other it wouldn't.

If it were me, I'd wait until he was inside, ask for the watch, and tell him I was sorry he chose to take it too school. That would be the end of the watch and the conversation.

Now you know your son best and your plan might be the right one. Just throwing this out cause I know when I'm angry and IN a situation, deciding what to do is always harder.

Hope the week improves.

DianeScraps · #9 06-03-2008, 01:11 PM

oh yuck!

If you don't have any weeks at your house for him to pull - I have a TON, Or maybe I could send my brother over in full Army uniform

I stil have girl scout cookies too, if you need a delivery :-D

mrsred · #10 06-04-2008, 03:46 PM

Amy, it is a day later and I don't see any posts as to what happened. Hope you are not still wrestling with him.

AmyAnne · #11 06-04-2008, 09:10 PM

He's okay now. He was in fine form for the better part of the afternoon. Got in a bad mood after I took his watch and wanted to fight me on any or all topics. Did not even ADDRESS consequences then. (THank you LucyJoy, for that advice!!

)

Today, I used a Love and Logic For Teens method which was not to tell him what he was going to do, but to tell him what WE were going to do. "So. Tonight's the last night to register for football. Dad will be ready to take you when dinner is over and you have paid back 1 hour of the inconvenience time you owe"

Him: "I'm NOT doing inconvenience time"

Me: "No problem"

Him: "But you JUST SAID Dad won't take me until I do it. That means I won't get to play football!"

Me: "you're probably right"

Him: And I won't get to play with my friends until I do it!

Me: You're probably right

Him: And I BET I don't get screen time back until I do it

Me: You're probably right

him: SIGH. What do I have to do?

The watch is disposed of. The money is returned. He will be dealing with The Bank Of Mom for awhile... I will keep all his money for him since he is not able to keep track of his own money right now.

Since a lot of this is impulse control related... I have decided I am making stop signs. I am putting these signs on things that are problems and writing the question he needs to ask himself.

For example, on the inside of the front door. "STOP. Did you tell Mom or Dad that you are going outside?" We'll see how it works

waited2long · #12 06-04-2008, 09:16 PM

I like the stop signs! I hope they help.

mrsred · #13 06-04-2008, 10:31 PM

Amy, I love that Love & Logic thing, and thank you for reminding me of it! Am just hopeful I can remain as detached as you wre able to.

AmyAnne · #14 06-04-2008, 10:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrsred

Amy, I love that Love & Logic thing, and thank you for reminding me of it! Am just hopeful I can remain as detached as you wre able to.

Hah. Don't give me too much credit. I mentally rehearsed this ALL DAY LONG.

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