[hydroxybutane]

Hey everyone,

I'm looking for some resources I am looking to review good touching / bad touching with the little girls (B and M). We have to review this on a regular basis, because it takes both girls awhile to learn things

Also any recommendations for some I'm hitting Puberty for R...I've had a hard time finding something that is a little more sensitive for kids that have a history of sexual abuse..

[jumpingfroggy]

I can't help with the little ones, but I have an 11 yo. She has a bunch of books by America Girl called "A Smart Girls Guide to..." There are a bunch of them, "A Smart Girls Guide to Boys", "A Smart Girls Guide to Middle School", "A Smart Girls Guide to Sticky Situations". They've been really great for my daughter covering everything from dealing with boys you like to safety when home alone. You might check them out.

[aspenhall]

I *just* had this talk with my dd (age 7). We sat down to go through all her old summer clothes and see what still fit. I took the opportunity to have that talk when she questioned why it mattered if some skirts were too short, if they still fit her waist.

She's already been told about the levels of relationships, illustrated by concentric circles and I just applied that idea to the concept of a "body bubble" ....hugs are for the inner circle of trusted family only.... and a bad touch is one that makes you uncomfortable...I put may arm around her and asked her how it felt, then I put my hand on her knee/leg and asked her, then keeping my hand on her knee, asked her if I was a friend how would this feel, and then if I was a stranger how would it feel.....she got all creeped out during the talk, but I told her that even if it's a kid she knows, or an adult we trust....if the touch feels uncomfortable, she has a right to ask the person to stop and she needs to come tell us about it and we'd take care of it. I told her she has the right to protect her own body. I used the word "Creep" to describe that there are people (kids and adults) who like to look at underwear and touch private parts. I explained that if she were wrestling (she loves to wrestle and do physical type play) it would be easy for someone to touch her that way and she wouldn't notice...so she needs to be careful who she allows physical touch with and how.

We were able to approach the idea that sexual abuse exists, without using those exact words. She understood it all and I saw a visible transformation in her character from a little kid who was clueless, to an older child who was aware of her surroundings and self.

Now when I ask her to close her legs, or remind her she's in a skirt, she understands why and makes that choice for herself.

I hope I helped give you some ideas.

[Barksum]

I'll see if I can find the title of the book, since I can't remember it off the top of my head, but it used the term 'secret touch' and not keeping secrets from our parents, etc. If someone wants to keep a secret you need to tell mom or dad, etc. They went over the privacy of one's body and stuff, too. Now to go see if I can find that book...!

I think it might be No More Secrets for Me by Oralee Wachter. Not sure, but the description sounded like I remembered the book.