[qs mom]

I have had trouble with the bus aide on my son's bus since the first week of school. This guy is just nuts!

He has belittled Q, manhandled him, yelled in his face, among other things.

I have spoken with the bus company. I have sent them letters, I have talked with the CSE. The bus company's take is that its' Q's word vs. the adult aide. My son is the problem.

This jerk of an aide has repeatedly told my parents (and he's told me) that he is going to have my son kicked off the bus "he doesn't belong here" "he's disruptive" "he doesn't listen" yada, yada.

This isn't the general population bus. This is the 'special' bus.

Today he made my dad get on the bus to show him what Q did. Some kids were verbally abusing Q, calling him an F'ing baby. Q threw the seat belt across the aisle. It is attached to the seat, he couldn't have reached across the aisle with it, he couldn't have hurt anyone, but not the point. The aide also took Q's sunglasses and REFUSED to give them back to grandpa.

Well, grandpa hit the roof. He was so mad, he almost called the police for not giving back the sunglasses. Finally he realized he was being ridiculous. But dad is still fuming mad.

I called the bus company . . . again. Got the run around. They claim that they will talk to the driver to get his story.

I'm thinking of contacting the bus company and requesting that all communication regarding my son's behaviour be firected to me in writing. Either by mail or email. Nothing should be discussed with my parents or in front of Q. They all get so upset that they don't think clearly. Is this an unreasonable request?

[waited2long]

Can you do what Lylac did and get the tapes? They will prove whether or not the aide is overreacting to Q's behaviour.

[qs mom]

We don't have cameras. I thought of it. I was actually thinking of asking my mom to take a picture of the aide taking Q off the bus, shoving him across the street. But my mom is really technoligically inept. I aleady know that digital point n shoot would be too tough for her.

[waited2long]

No camera... that stinks. Perhaps you could get your parents a mini tape recorder? It only records sound, but they are easier to use and the aide won't know about it. Or, you could stick one in Qs backback!

[Lylac]

This rubs my sore spot!! ALL special needs buses "should" have camera's on them. It should be a law.

It's sad but without any evidence, it will "always" be his word against yours.

I would skip the bus company, because they obviously aren't gonna help. I'd go to the Board of Education. (that is unless the guy is married to the chairman

[mrsred]

listen to Lylac, she has gone through the fire on this one. The fact that they don't have cameras is already a strike against them in my books, but there should never, ever be a case of an adult screaming at or shoving a special needs kid. He doesn't belong on this bus? What bus does he belong in? That sort of attitude in a person that is being paid to work with special needs children is unacceptable. The bus company obviously doesn't care, perhaps the elected members of the school board will.

[Peggy]

I had issues with my daughter's driver. Though really the opposite. He would buy her things. I asked him to stop. He did not. So I called the school. The secretary gave some lame answer about it being hard to find drivers, but I kept going up the chain.

[TxMom65]

Anyone who puts their hands on a special needs child because of behavior must be trained in non violent crisis intervention. (that is the law in our state and I do think it si federal, not 100% sure) He should have some certification in a restraint training class and have to fill out a form any time he uses a restraint. Otherwise, hands off.

[hydroxybutane]

Ohhh..I would be FURIOUS! How dare an AIDE for your son act in such a manner...that's ridiculous! Unfortunately it is your word (or Q's) against his unless you can get some proof..I'm sneaky and I would go with the tape recorder in the backpack..or start training mom to take pictures

I would also start going up the chain, at the bus company and at the Board of Education. It is absolutely UNACCEPTABLE that any child (special bus or not) be treated in such a manner...

Poor Q....

[qs mom]

Our district doesn't have it's own buses. We use a service. I've been told repeatedly that the bus company hires their own aides. The school has nothing to do with it, nor can they make discipline actions.

Which BURNS me up!

The driver must have confimed much of my suspicions, since suddenly Mr. Aide is now holding my son's hand as he walks him across the street. And he's keeping his mouth shut in regard to my child. But, I know it won't last.

I too feel that cameras should be on the bus. And at least 1 trained aide. Our district doesn't allow any restraining holds. In fact, when he was in Kindergarten, I needed to write a very specific letter or authorization for his kindergarten teacher authorizing her and the principal to use a safe hold on Q. A sub restrained him once and was fired - she was not authorized. I didn't even know about it until a year later.

I just keep reminding Q to sit quietly on the bus. To ignore nasty comments, to ignore bad language.

He very much enjoys Sunday School and Junior Church. He really 'gets' it. He tries to tie Christianity into everyday life. So drawing on that to these bus situations can help him.

[Peggy]

The school is still responsible. They can inform the service that the aide is acting inappropriately.

[qs mom]

The director of CSE and the Special Ed principal have gotten involved. I just don't have a lot of confidence in much being settled. But maybe I'm wrong.

Before sleeping tonight he told me he didn't want to go to school tomorrow. I asked him why and he said it was because he's bored. I wonder if its the bus too.

[momraine]

I would talk to other parents as well. I would bet Q is not the only kid he is mean to.

[hydroxybutane]

Even better...the school board has to pay the bill!!

They are definitely still responsable..They HIRED a company. Maybe they can't do discipline of the aids, but they can just not hire that company again

Keep up the fight! No child deserves that kind of treatment. Be close to Q, hopefully this aide doesn't start making his abuse more subtle..

[qs mom]

Q and I are pretty close. I'm a single mama, so it's just the 2 of us!

I have been a little more diligent of asking about the bus lately, not just school in general. I have explained to him what is not ok. But sometimes he just doesn't get it.

Just part of his disability. My son is 7. He reads like a champ. He is a math whiz. Has a fabulous vocabulary, awesome receptive language.

But he can't tell you his address or phone #. He has a hard time knowing what is real and what is not. He's more of a 4 year old understanding of real and fantasy.