[AmyAnne]

This marks night two of "unprovoked tantruming"... or tantruming over a little tiny thing. Tonight's tantrum was sparked by two things: Austin was corrected because I asked him to carry a sweet potato pie home from church and he put it on his skateboard and tried to push it home with his foot. After dinner, when he wanted dessert, DH reminded him we eat food at the table and do not wander all over the house eating and he had a FIT.

Finally after much struggling, mumbling, disassociation and tears, it comes out..... Austin's lived in homes before where he was excluded from family celebrations such as Thanksgiving and Christmas. Add that to the upcoming adoption anniversary, he's feeling the stress. Plus he has a cold.

Let's HOPE we're done with the tantrums for awhile. My heart can only take so much.

[athikers]

Poor kiddo. Deep down, he's thankful he's not in a home like that anymore, but what horrible memories. Hang in there.

[lucyjoy]

Sorry your son is tantrumming. Sometimes holidays are just more then they can take. I have vivid memories of restraining a kid for 4 hours one Thanksgiving morning and going to dinner covered in bruises. Doesn't make for a pleasant holiday.

I have excluded children from holiday celebrations. I've also glued them to my beltloop at parties. I will not allow one child to ruin a holiday for 35 other people. So while it is sad that your son was excluded, I do understand why that happens sometimes so count me among the cruel people.

I do hope now that your son has been able to use his words to share with you that he will now be able to fully enjoy his holiday with you and that you will have a peaceful happy time.

[AmyAnne]

Lucy,

Yep the holidays are a mess for him and if he tantrumed at Thanksgiving, I can see being sent to his room. This has just been a sucky week.

DH got a migraine Monday night. He was home Tuesday. Kiddo had a huge tantrum after school Tuesday. DH came home to help with housecleaning and got ANOTHER MIGRAINE and then kiddo threw another fit. Kiddo also missed the school bus this morning, so after a night of insomnia I had to get up to drive him so DH wouldn't be late for work. And I have to cook tomorrow and host my critical, negative inlaws.

[Lorraine123]

I too have excluded my child from holidays. One person does not have the right to ruin the fun for all the others. In fact, my daughter is currently heading that way. However, I know that this time of year is very hard for kids like ours. I hope that A can get realize the cause of his tantrums and work through them. Hugs to you Amy.

[qs mom]

I actually hate from Halloween until Valentine's. I know that my son won't be able to string together more than 2 days without something happening.

Since Halloween, he's kicked his teacher, been to the principal's office twice, brought my mother to tears everyday for a week by being so mean and nasty to her, frustrated one of his dance teachers to the point that she walked out of the class for a minute to compose herself, and he's quite lucky I haven't killed him. I've been thinking, hmm, jail means I don't have to cook, clean, work, pay bills and someone else will feed me. It doesn't seem so bad sometimes.

[momraine]

Just a note on the migraines. Remembering that our kids don't always get cause and effect thinking and if they do they think it's all about them - Explain to him that dad has gotten migrains since before kiddo came along (if it's tru) and that kiddo does not cause them. (the stress probably contributes, but it's not all caused by the kid and he may blame himself) and also talk about what dad does when he gets one - lay down, take medicine, etc and then about what he does not do - hit, make people leave the house, make kids take care of him, get mean, etc. This kid may have seen people who have headaches (read hangover or other results of substances) who get mean or make him take care of them or don't take care of him or whatever. So it might be scary for him to see dad with a migraine. Also let him know that migraines are not fatal, you never know what kinds of fears kids cook up in thier little brains.

[qs mom]

I agree with momraine. My son gets totally freaked out when I'm sick. I'm the only person he's ever had in his life and he really loses it when I'm sick or if he even thinks I'm sick.

[MomwithFive]

Let's HOPE we're done with the tantrums for awhile. My heart can only take so much.>>

I hope things calm down for you. We have experienced a few unprovoked tantrums here too. I think the holiday season may be difficult some days.

[jojobear]

We are right there with you on this one. My son who is Five has been having issues for over a week now. Plus they are changing his meds around which doesn't help. We cut today short because of it. Oh well. Doesn't bother me to stick around the house more. But we did have a break through in therapy the other night. Therapist asked how he had been sleeping. (this is an ongoing issue) told her we were back to crying in our sleep so she asked kiddo, do you dream his reply only at christmas time. She asked about what he clammed up and just said i only dream bad at christmas time. So it is a small door opening. Hang in there
Jody

[SAHmom]

No advice, just hugs!

[athikers]

Good advice, insight about when RADlets sometimes being "excluded" due to behavior. I was thinking more along the lines of A was being excluded because he wasn't "really" a family member, kwim? The behavior one, I get. The idiot "you're not one of us" makes me mad.