[Again!]

OK, so my 9 year old RAD, fire setting, pet killing, threatening to kill me and sibs, adopted son is not doing well at the cash pay RTC either. Had a meeting today a community resource group, CPS in attendence, and the conclusion was, if a few more phone call don't turn up leads, CPS will take him back...BUT...I have to call the hotline and basically report myself for abandonment. The CPS investigator present explained it would be ruled out once we show we had a CRCG meeting and exhausted all avenues, but it still makes me uncomfortable. I must say on the positive side, everyone has been very supportive and sympathetic in this very grim process of dissolution, including the CPS workers I met today. Has anybody else done this?

[Lorraine123]

I would be very reluctant to do that. CPS can tell that it will be ruled out, but, CPS tells a lot of things. Everyone I know who has done this, has had really bad results.

[Barksum]

Some states don't have a process in place to help people in your particular situation, and so they have this convoluted run-around with the parents being charged, but not really.... Which is just bizarre because this happens more than they tell you during foster and adoptive parent training! Lorraine makes an excellent point; CPS can say pretty much anything they want to, but unless they have a deputy AG sitting next to them, they don't really know that they have the legal ability to do anything or guarantee anything. Talk, after all, is cheap. You can bet this case would be put thru the AG's office and be vetted before steps are taken on their side. No one else at that meeting is in your position, so they will all have a different perspective on what you should/should not do.

I'd suggest that you get a lawyer and find out, exactly, what your state's laws are regarding parents in your situation, and what options you may have. It may be expensive now, but boy, it could save you a million dollars worth of heartache later. You really need legal representation for yourself (or you and Dh) because your Ds will likely have an attorney assigned, and the state has the AG's office at their disposal. YOU need a lawyer; this WILL go to court, and you need to understand the process and what is really going on under all the legal jargon.

((hugs))

[redfred]

I second the suggestion that you get a lawyer. CPS makes all kinds of promises, but they will also turn around and bite you in the @## two seconds later. Aslo, if the social worker gets assigned to another case, you may end up with a newbie or worse - a bitter control freak who wants to destroy you and your family.

Get a lawyer to be at your side each step of the way.

Good luck.