[Michele81]

Some of you know about my 12 yo daughter, who has been with us for almost 11 weeks & is doing her best to wrest control from me. Now she is physically going after me, hitting me & trying to push me down the stairs. Last night dh & I told her that one more show of physical violence would lead to a 911 call, which happened this morning.

The cw is coming after school (yep, awesome mom that I am, got her on the bus in time!) & said that she doesn't know what, if any, sort of respite we can get since dd is from out-of-state & the agency can't approve respite with dd's current behaviors.

I want to give dd every opportunity to heal in our family, although physical attacks on me will NOT be tolerate. We love this kid but were told by her placing agency that she had NEVER threatened or tried to harm anyone but herself. Any suggestions are appreciated. Thanks!

[zebramom]

Are you doing attachment therapy yet? What about holding or cuddle time each day? Yes, even though she is physically 11, she is probably emotionally much younger.

It is likely she will fight holding/cuddling in the begining but will let her guard down eventually.

Yes, you need to protect your physical safety, and respite should be mandatory with what she's doing. By saying they can't approve it with her current behaviors it's lessening what you deal with. It's OK for you to deal with it, but not anyone else.

I hate the system!!

[Lorraine123]

I sent you a PM.

[Michele81]

Yes, we have a great attachment therapist & are doing regressive therapy, including snuggle time and bottle feeding but as her discomfort increases, so does her aggression. I can deal with a lot, even though I'm a first time parent, but not a threat to myself. I may need to let her escalate so she can be placed in RTC for a bit if all else fails.