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Originally Posted By Question

Has anyone ever had a child who hurt pets?

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Originally Posted By louise

...the animals in a fostr home and/or SN adoptive home are an endangered species! All joking aside we have had several children [inc. one currently] that has been abusive in varying degrees to our pets. We have always had a number of animals [currently 4 dogs, 4 cats, a rabbit and a 6 week old kitten] and each of them has been the target of some of our kids. The flip side of this matter is that the animals can be very theraputic. We have found that the unacceptable behaviour diminishes as the child becomes more secure in our home. It seems that when the child first arrives angry feelings are expressed on those smaller i.e the animals. We have only had one child who who continued to try to do harm and actually almost succeeded in killing two of our pets. In the meantime, when the children are adjusting we are very vigilent in supervising and both quick and consistent with consequences. I'm grateful that our pets are tolerant and can eventually be such wonderful companions for even our most challenging children. Good luck!

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Originally Posted By Jerry

Animals can be very theraputic. But caution is advised at any time children and animals are together. We've used our horses to build self esteem. It's a lot of work for us, the horse, and the child. There's something exciting about learning how to communicate, and cooperatie with something as large as a horse. I believe it facilitates the "self actualization" process. We talk about what we're going to do with the horse, show what we are doing with the horse, and then have the child give it a try. Close supervision and a restricted working/riding area are the norm.
We have 5 dogs. Three of which are of the belief that they must protect us from everything, and two border collie's that love everyone. We introduce the dogs one at a time and talk about their individual breed characteristics, and perosnality. We emphasise from the begining that no person or animal at our home is allowed to be kicked, hit, beat, whipped etc.

Somewhwere along the way the kids seem to get the idea that you don't have to be physical when you're angry, or get hurt when someone else is angry at you......but you do have to work at "connecting."

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Originally Posted By Mike

During my homestudy process, one thing I made clear to my worker is that I could not accept a child who harmed animals. I've always had pets and probably always will. I fully understand WHY kids hurt pets, but I can't put my animals in danger.

Both of the social workers who have been to my home (Ellen and Jimmy from Ohio's worker) LOVED my pets. Jimmy's worker even said "I bet Jimmy will want Jake (the dog) to sleep in his room." Well, I told her, that probably won't happen since Jake will go UP stairs, but will not go DOWN stairs. As Jake weighs 165 pounds, I don't really want to carry his big butt down the stairs. I also explained to her about my bird, Oscar. The last perople who had Oscar were very cruel to him. They slapped him around and kept him in a WAY too small cage. Jimmy's worker knew what I was saying and slyly noted "Make sure you tell Jimmy that story if he comes here."

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Originally Posted By Pam

We said we wouldn't even consider a child who was mean to pets, who had FAS or RAD, etc. Hahaha. Big deal. Rayon can tease and be quite mean to the pets anyways, although there is no history of this in the files. In fact, it says he LOVES pets,a nd I think he does. I think that being adopted is just freaking him out and making him do things he never dreamed of doing in foster care. We have a close watch on him with any of our animals. Moral of the story: You can't be sure

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Demario had virtually no experience with animals when he arrived here, and we have lots of pets. Amazingly though, while this kid can completely trample the feelings of the rest of us around the home, he is very, very gentle with the pets and his baby sister.

One day, he was angry at one of the dogs for chewing up one of his toys (that he had left in the dog's path). Demario grabbed up a baseball bat and went running toward the dog, wielding this bat. My husband and I were in the process of coming to the dog's rescue when Demario reached it. Suddenly, he stops right there in front of the dog, drops the bat, bends down, and says, very softly while wagging his finger at the animal, "The next time you want to want to play with my toys, you need to ASK!"

We preceeded to inform him that, if he doesn't want the dog to "play" with his toys, he needs to keep them out of the dog's reach.

In regards to Baby Alia, she's almost two years old and loves to give kisses. Those big, sloppy, open-mouth, St. Bernard style, two-year-old type kisses. Demario is her favorite target with these kisses, because he's the one most likely to give her a reaction. The rest of us just wipe the slobber off our faces and go on. But, Demario rolls around on the floor, trying to cover up his face and she usually ends up cackling, climbing on him, and drooling in his hair. While this act is always quite supervised, it's really kind of funny to see.

-Susan C.

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Originally Posted By Mike

I feel the same way, Pam. Once I get a boy, he may decide to be less than ideal withg the animals, but I'll just have to watch him. One of the boys I'm being considered for actually volunteers at an animal shelter and it is VERY theraputic for him (he can't have pets at home because foster mom is deathly allergic). I tell workers when we talk about pets that I would allow a boy to have a pet of "his own" if I thought he could handle it. Now, I'm not talking about horses or cats (which I REALLY dislike), but something small like a guniea pig or a rabbit. For those of you with kids looking for a small pet, I recommend guinea pigs HIGHLY!! They are docile, don't bite, and are reasonably neat. They're also big enough for a child to hold without much trouble and they LOVE attention.

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Originally Posted By Jerry

Well let me just slip those reins in my teeth, adjust my eye patch, load those rifles....................

Seriously, pets of any size are not for everybody. I've been around horses a good portion of my life and have a connection to them, even the mean ones (they're usually the ones that have been beaten). I'm very allergic to cats, but we have.....is that 2 or 3 or 4......... abunch of them anyway. We've had to bannish all the animals outside because the allergies have gotten so bad. For some reason I'm not bothered to badly by the dogs or horses. I'm vey serious about supervision around the animals until I'm sure the child and the animal respect each other.

We raised cattle and those little calves are real cute, until they step on you or look for dinner (cows, sheep and goats all butt their mother's belly to get milk to drop so they can nurse)...and they're not shy about finding the lowest spot between your legs!!!LOL!!. If any of our kids have the desire and responsibility we'll most likely allow them to raise a larger animal. There's plenty of dogs and cats to choose from, if not I'm sure there's probably more on the way!!!LOL!!

I do however draw the line at reptiles, I'm sorry you just can't cuddle and confide in a snake or lizard.!!!LOL!!!

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Originally Posted By Mike

Dissing those poor reptiles like that!! They need love, too.

Actually, I like reptiles as pets, too. They are very clean and quiet and, yes, they can be cuddled, too. A friend of mine is VERY allergic to fur and feathers, but loves animals. Thus, Karen has several reptiles, including two BIG tortoises that wander around the house like big, lumbering dogs. Another of her pets a 10' boa who loves to curl up aound your shoulders and in your lap.

If you do have a child who like animals but is allergic, I would suggest a box turtle or an iguana. Be sure to read up on them like you would any pet, but don't rule them out just becase they're not warm and fuzzy.

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Originally Posted By AC

I specifically told them I didn't want a kid that harmed animals. Richie stated in his file he always wanted a dog and I have a relatively small dog(cockapoo). At first he was stand offish then when I assured him he wouldn't bite,maybe take your food, but NEVER bite. He calmed down and after I told him he loved to be rubbed especially his stomach I think he going to rub his fur off. But the dog loved every minute.

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Originally Posted By Jerry

Turtles are pretty cool, and we have had a couple. My son has 3 in his big aquarium. My family was raised in the south and it's unusual for people that have seen how deadly snakes (in particular not so much lizards) can be, to be tolerant. I guess that's one of those sins of the father things!!!LOL!! If you like snakes you ought to come down here because I think every snake known to man is indeginous to Georgia!!!!LOL!!! I have finally desensitized enough to leave the king snakes alone (they're your friend don't you know). We haven't seen any this year, yet. Last year we killed rattle snakes, copperheads, and water mocasins (the ole cottonmouth). So far this year we haven't found any, but I know they're out there.............they've killed 3 of our chickens. What's really creepy here is during the really hot month's the snakes climb trees to cool off and then "fall out" at will.....Oh well I must go get rid of the heeevee jeevees now!!!LOL!!!

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We have a dog, a cat, two guinea pigs and a rat. The animals are great models to teach unconditional love. The dog and cat are pretty resilient and are the first ones our daughters related with. My son has the rat and he has learned gentleness, nurturing and responsibility from him. My oldest daughter had a guinea pig in her room but the poor thing was very nervous. We named her Frantic. We moved her downstairs and she relaxed tremendously. We let my daughter have a "pet" plant. The plant is doing well. My guinea pig is named "Snapper" and yes Mike, they can bite.

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Originally Posted By Mike

Wow, I've NEVER known a guniea pig to bite. I stand corrected. Hamsters, on the other hand, can be pure evil. I worked in a pet shop in high school and got bitten several times by hamsters. One of the little monsters even drew blood! I had the last laugh, though: he became snake food.

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Originally Posted By louise

....are plain old nasty. We've had several and after having been bitten never again. I'll take a pet rat anyday!!!!

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Our rat was rescued from the snake food train. He is the most loving guy imaginable. Frantic the guinea, was a foster guinea and we are her third placement. Snapper was an infant guinea who was just trying to establish her defensive zone I guess. She has learned to trust and doesn't bite anymore. She had everyone at bay for awhile.