[wenrl]

we may have a second child soon. She could have moved in on Monday as a foster placement, but I got "the call" in the form of e-mail at work while I was on vacation, so by the time I got all of her information and my partner and I said yes, she had already moved somewhere else. I think that may have been a good thing as I was so sick Monday and Tuesday anyway.

However, her goal will eventually be adoption and her current home is strictly foster, I think, so her worker wants to consider us as a potential permanant placement.

I can't say much more as everything is very much up in the air. But I will say she is very different from T. in history, behaviors and appearance. I don't know if that would be good or bad thing, but it is what we wanted. I also don't know how long we should wait to mention anything to T. Would it be better to see it coming and then maybe not happen or have a sibling sprung on her all of the sudden (although she does know to expect anything at anytime)? I don't know, but it sounds like we have time to think anyway.

[aMarylandfamily]

Hoping this works out for you ... looking forward to updates!

As far as when to say something, I would begin with light conversations (asap) about what it would mean to have another child and see what reaction you get ... and then roll from there ... don't wait til last minute - it could make her feel like "all along I wasn't enough so you were looking without letting me me a part of it" ... Just a thought ...

Watching for more posts!

[nikkib365]

I would think that since she already knows that she may soon have a sibling in the home, that you could prepare her for the possibility of the placement then if it happens she won't feel left out of the loop on things. If the placement does not happen, there may be some disappointment but maybe you could prepare her in advance for the prospect of that happening.

I hope things work out!

[Lorraine123]

How exciting!!!! Keep us updated!!!!

[TickTock]

How exciting!

[Kerbchek]

Sounds like there are options and time to think... good luck sorting out the info... I'll be anxious to hear how things work out!!

[Faith65]

How Exciting! Keep us posted!

[bjolly]

if they do decide to place her with you, you'll probably have a period of visiting, which will give you enough time to prepare T. I'd wait until it's pretty definite to tell her. How old is the other child?

can't wait to hear more....congrats on the new possibility and keep us posted!

[karenw]

Hope this is good news and that it is a good match!!! Keep us posted
Karen

[octavias]

How exciting!
we have a 10 yr. old, who was 9 during out process with F, and we kept him informed the whole way. He is a very bright kid, and would have know that something was up anyway, so I've always been super open and candid with him. Not sure if I would be that open with my other two, even if they were older, they are not as mellow. I guess what I'm saying, in my roundabout, noncommital sort of way, is that I think it depends on her personality/maturity. You know her best, go with your gut.

[crick]

WOW! All the waiting and now boom! I'm excited for y'all and keep us updated!

[ajjhmf]

Cool! Keep us posted and congrats!

[aspenhall]

I would suggest doing the whole....what do you think about a sibling...cause we have been discussing it....kind of talk

[wenrl]

We told T. of the possibility a couple of nights ago and explained it is only a maybe situation at this point.

She's known about the upcoming sibling situation from the beginning, but it's taking so long in her mind I think sometimes she thinks it will never happen anyway. We wanted to tell her just in case, because we make a big deal about honesty in our house, so didn't want it to seem we're keeping anything from her in case once something happens, it happens fast.

She seems kinda in the same place as us: excited but not overly so, maybe a little confused. She spent a lot of time in foster care, so she knows the routine and how things can and do change at any time. I don't think we'll really see any interest for her either way until something actually happens. She was really excited when we first began waiting and talked about having a little sister all the time. Now it's old news until someone moves in.

As for us, I wonder how long it will take to hear more either way. Nothing yet.

[dadfor2]

well, congrats wenrl, we all wait here to hear the updates. I think T is like most, 'it happening till it actually happens'

isnt thats how we were when we were waiting, until it actually starts happening, and the feelings start to change...

i would just keep talkking about it, like regular conversation so she doesnt need to feel like shes left out. and every once in a while talk about how long it is....

either way, what great news.