[Indy]

Ok...I have really lost it. I just read a book about "No more Ritalin" or something like that. I am seriously considering working with my family physician and reducing (eliminating) the boys meds. I have been reading many books about diets and eating properly. I have experienced many of the situations in this book and really believe that there has to be another way.

In my home, we have concerta, wellbutrin, clonadine, adderall, trazadone, immiprine (?), risperal (?). Don't even ask what other meds they (psycharists) have "tried" on them. I feel like my sons have been human experiments in what works. One of the remarks made by my doctor, "...medicated to sedate". The bill for my family alone EXCEEDS $1500 per month! Just for meds still! That doesn't even include doctor appointments, counseling, and therapy!

Enough is enough! Anyone out there know any specialist that help me find a REAL solution to the problem, rather than giving the boys new pills? I don't want any doctors saying, "oh no, you can't do that". I want real solutions to help my sons. I want a doctor that will work with each son where they are at right now.

I have also decided that if I have to, I will home school my sons. I am tired of teachers suggestioning that I should consider increasing the boys meds because they are hitting puberty. Sometimes, I think it is the teacher that needs the meds. I know for a fact that I could not sit at a desk for 7-8 hours and just listen, but we expect kids to do that.

Stay tuned...

[DianeS]

I certainly wish you luck. With the stable home and firm limits your sons have had for a while now, you're certainly in a better position to try this than many foster or adoptive homes. I certainly hope you succeed.

I do have one suggestion from a friend whose bio-children are on several types of medication: Focus on one disorder at a time. To try to take on all the different issues and medications at once is too much to handle. And even when you think you've found a solution to try, try it on one child at a time. For instance, study up on the food issues that can be used to control ADD or ADHD - change the boys' diet, keep it stable for several weeks, and then wean one boy off that particular medication, then another boy, then another.

If it works, keep it stable that way for a while to be sure. Then study up on another food issue that can be used to control something else, change their diet and keep it stable, then wean one boy off that particular medication. Etc. Repeat.

My friend's example was taking her children off of all artificial colorings in food (red dye was the biggest issue for her). First she eliminated artifical colorings from their diets, and took all three children off all their meds at once - and was met with pandemonium. She put them all back on, kept the diet, and tried one child with one medication at a time. The food changes she had made worked for some of the medications for some of the kids, but not all. She's now working on a way to elimiate or at least reduce the others. But she admits it was folly to assume that one change could elimiate all the different types of medications, and insane to try everyone at once. Because if even one child acted up because of the change, it could affect the others' behavior too, and lead her to believe it didn't work for anybody.

I'll be interested to hear what you find out. Good luck!

[hipretty]

I do not know what the Dx is of your children...but do you know about the GFCF diet? It is recommmended for children all along thae Autism Spectrum from Autism (some Down's kids who have Autistic like behaviors) to ADD, ADHD children. Many parents see incredible results, and can even tell when their kids have gotten their hands on the culprit foods, due to backsliding!!!

I have pulled from my son's diet, every know allergen, and even some I suspected but the doctors could not confirm. He is not on meds, which I know is very different than pulling him off meds, but with dietary intervention, therapies and lot's of love and patience, he has come incredibly far.

But after all our blood, sweat tears and the grace of G-d...he has been traumatized after a year of verbal abuse and physical, endangerment in the school he was in (don't ask me where, I can not talk about this) use of humiliation and aversives (to bully him into what I guess is the behavior they feel is appropriate) They punished him and shamed him.

I am pulling him out and homeschooling him this coming year. I do not know how Home schooling is looked upon in the various adoption communities. but at this point I am fed up with the system that is always angry with my son, for doing things that are the very nature of his disorder!!

I am nervous, all the home schoolers I know say the first year is the hardest, I am up for a very difficult adjustment, as school is very scheduled and that is what special kids often require, and I am a free spirit. But I feel I will do a better job than they did with him in Kindergarten!!!

If I can get past this first homeschooling year, We will be ok! And he will be allowed to bloom and flourish and learn, not be choked by a warped educational setting!!! And the concerned father that you are, I imagine whatever you decide...you will be ok too! Good Luck!
Keep us posted.

Love & Light, Tee

[elefant99]

I don't have any children, but I thought I would offer some advise based on what I have observed over the past 3 years at the residential school I teach at. Yes, I realize that my children are much more intensive than yours, and that I am making the observations from the other side of the fence (the dreaded teacher side - I see we're not popular with you guys!). At any rate...

1. Sometimes going off all meds truly is an option - sometimes it isn't. Some kids come into our facility so doped up they can barely walk. Our doctors generally take the kids off all meds (except meds for seizure disorders or other meds like that) and give the kids a chance to succeed with only behavioral interventions. An amazingly large amount have succeeded over time and intensive intervention (behavioral mostly, some nutritional). Some kids need to be put back onto meds to help them succeed. I'm sure this is a painful process for the parents and they probably do feel like their kid is a "guinea pig". Unfortunately, because of the exceptional nature of these children, trial and error is sometimes the only way to find just the right med for a particular child. Another problem that one of our doctors brought up in trying to find the best medicinal assistance for one of my students is that often there is simply not enough research done with these meds and their effects on children. Also, if a child has multiple exceptionalities (Downs and Autism, or CP and ADHD, for example) it is even more difficult.

2. Sometimes a change of teachers/educational settings is necessary. Some kids show a marked improvement just by transfering to our school - honestly, any change might have made this improvement. Some kids make the most amazing changes after transitioning back into a regular education setting after being at our school. Some kids need to find just the right teacher in order to succeed. A truly exceptional teacher can help almost any child succeed, but even those teachers will still have a child or two over their teaching careers that they just never... reach. I can't imagine how horrible it is to have that be your child that isn't being reached. Also, can I just say that it is ILLEGAL for a teacher to suggest meds for a child, or to suggest an increase in meds (at least in my state). I hate when some teachers do stupid things - I don't think they realize that they can color the whole educational system for a parent! Grrr... Also, you are absolutely right that no-one should be expected to sit for 7-8 hours at a time at their desk - a teacher who truly understood the needs of his/her students would NEVER make a child do that - ANY CHILD! Grrr again!

3. Sometimes home schooling is best. I do not see a time when I will find this to be the best option for a future child, but as a special education teacher I am probably more equipped to maneuver through all of the ins and outs of the education system to ensure the best possible experience for each child. With that said, who knows how my opinion might change given a child with exceptional needs and a move to a district without appropriate resources on hand...

4. Sounds like you need a new doctor who listens better and can truly help your children instead of just medicating them. I don't know the diagnosis of your children, but the meds you listed are all ones given for ADD/ADHD type issues. Perhaps this website will help.

Just did a quick search, and this lists clinics that specialize in ADD/ADHD, and perhaps they could give you a referral to a good doctor in your area.

Finally, good luck in whatever decision you make! You sound like a great Dad who cares very much for his children. I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you and your boys!

Keep us updated on what you do/decide to do...

[lucyjoy]

Before hitting no meds cold, find out exactly what conditions these meds treat. I did no meds on my kids when they were younger, but one has the beginning signs of adult schizophrenia and needs to be medicated to think clearly. Another has bi-polar showing up after puberty started and he is violent without the meds.

However, many of the other things my kids were medicated for were better treated in other ways. Exercise-especially running and biking, are great for ADHD kids. Also, avoiding red dye and soda(not just caffiene) also helped. Never feed canned ravioli to ADHD kids.

It's tough to homeschool special needs kids. I have one that loves it, and one that has fought me everyday and I am sending him to school this year for my own sanity. If you choose to homeschool the highschoolers, I'd advise using an online school as it cuts down on any control battles with you. They also end up with a diploma that way. Teaching 7 kids with different needs and levels at the same time is very stressful and there is never any breaks from the constancy of the kids. I love my kids, but finding time alone to regroup and even plan lessons can be very trying.

How do your kids feel about their meds and attending schools? This can make a big difference in the response.

[kamamsm]

Hi- I did it. My babies were medicated to the hilt- five pills three/ four times a day. Bascially all the drugs you mentioned. Ya'll know about the boy with whom we had to disrupt ( I never got the chance to get him off the meds) -- BTW He sees us often, as his sister stayed here, and he still loves us, & is finally doing well in his third placement after us. He had to be medicated, but our daughter is now off all meds except one adderall in the am & one (lowest dosage available ) anti-anxiety in the pm. We concentrated on behavior & added visual therapy & occupational therapy for sensory issues. We only serve splenda / splenda products and watch her diet big time. She is doing sooo well!

Also- we home school. Have been for years. This was one reason they chose us - because we could give her the one on one attention. I think homeschooling works for adopted special needs children for several reasons: #1 ADHD kids need less stimulus. #2 These children need as much time and attention as possible to counter balance the trauma they have experienced. #3 They need as much bonding time as possible with the adoptive family. #4 Most of these children have spent their lives looking to other kids for approval. Their focus should be shifted toward adults- not incompentent children. Lastly, most of these children have socialization problems that stem from the problems they have had in their birth families. Disfunctional families produce children who have problems ( and kids at school sense this like sharks sense blood in the water.) Sp. Needs Children need time to develop their socail skills in a controlled environment- where they won't be picked apart and tormented. They have already experienced enough damage to self esteem. To me- adoption should be when this damage ought to repaired/ healed.
Sorry this was long----- good luck.

[Again!]

Two of my 5 came on meds, I took both off completely. The most dramatic was the 4 year old who was on adderal, clonidine and risperidol. My older son does have ADHD and does do better in school with medication, currently he is on Strattera. The 4 year old now 6 is not on meds.

We also use some strategies mentioned above, minimal sugar, no TV, no sodas.

I tried public school with both sets of kids, failed miserably. The older kids did well in Catholic school (small classes) for a while, but my son eventually wore out his welcome. Currently they are in a small Christian school that uses a homeschooling curriculum. It has been a great blessing to us. My daughter, 7, who seems to be bright is accelerating and is already half way through 2nd grade. My 6 year old son is reading and will be starting first on time, and the school is able to cope when he is anxious and has a bad day, which still happens frequently. My 5 year old is also reading, despite dx of receptive/expressive language disorder. And my older son, 13, gets to work by himself, which helps his ADD, and they send him out to the parking lot to jog when he feels ancy. I would highly reccommend alternative schooling for adoptive kids, as the public schools seem to be able to deal only with the absolute middle of the road children.

[Dianna]

Hi Indy, It sounds like you have gotten some great responses. I wanted to add that we are starting bio feedback therapy with our daughter at the recommendation of her psychiatrist. She has been on concerta, straterra, risperdal and effexor for a long time. She is entering puberty also and is looking forward to reducing her meds. The psychiatrist says that it can help a lot with the ADHD and help her regulate her moods. She will probably always need meds for the bipolar disorder though. I am also trying to get her into a charter school which focusses on teaching through art in our area. I don't know if they have these in your state but the one I found is wonderful. Good luck and best wishes in all your endeavors.

[Stormy]

Hi Indy. I know you have a couple kiddo's with ASD's. We put my PDD-NOS/ Borderline autism son on the Gluten Free Casien Free diet a few months ago to give it a try. We had heard about it and thought it would be worth the effort. I was very, very skeptical. But now am a huge convert! My son, for the first time in his life, is doing things and saying things that he has never done before. It has been a huge eye opener. Diet changes are tough. WE have changed the whole house over and have to cook a lot from scratch. But it was well worth the effort. I also have found that staying away from food dyes and even preservatives (the whole Feingold deal) has been a good idea. We can tell when he has eaten red dye #40 because he starts stimming uncontrollably. Good luck and if I can be of any help please let me know.

[hope4kids]

I also homeschool my daughters who have special needs and have managed to avoid meds. We use a lot of the things previously mentioned. We also use glyconutrients in a product called Ambotrose. I can't say what specifically has worked, but I wouldn't want to change any of what we are doing. I learned about glyconutrients because my dad has Parkinsons and his doctor told him about this natural product that could help him. It helped him, and he learned that it has helped kids with ADHD and other special needs. You can learn more about it's specific use with ADHD by searching for THe Result Program or Project. I will see if I can find a link.

AS far as homeschooling goes, it can be hard at times, but I love it! We school year round so that we have flexibility when a child needs to be hospitalized or a new placement arrive. We do three or four weeks of school, and then we take a week off. I am still in the early stages of homeschooling, but so far it has been great.

[Colorbind love]

I can't speak from personal experience on the medication front, though I agree with lucyjoy. Part of the reason I am so comitted to homeschooling my adopted children is because of their special educational needs. Now granted, I think my biological children benefit from it as well. But, when I was facing the additional challenges and needs of my children that came into my home much later, I really ruled out the option of even considering putting them in a school environment.

In homeschooling, you can accomplish the same level of instruction that a school requires 6-8 hours for in significantly less time. Its just not necessary to sit at a desk for hours upon hours in homeschooling, and its not that their education suffers from spending less time at it. Its just that they don't have to wait for anyone else. They do their work, they get personal instruction and attention and the move on. And, there are tons of options for homeschooling. There are a couple of homeschooling options that would completely remove you, as the parent, from the loop. In fact, I have a cousin who was a problem kid. She was getting into gangs, drugs, etc and her mother put her in a correspondence high school option. The teen dealt only with her teachers via telephone and email, rather than her mother. But, if she hadn't gone that route, she would have been a high school drop-out. Instead, she's now a college graduate.

[rindava]

Meds made things worse for my kids, one is going to try school again next year w/o meds, one does great in school, and one will be homeschooled.....

Really, check out Dr. Bryan Post and his stuff, buy his video or something.....and it can explain things better.....

Those teachers really don't care about your kids, they are just trying to make it through the school year.....

Kids can usually get through school work in 2 hours, and then structure the rest of the time. if they are in SpEd, then they will probably get more from homeschool anyway....

It usually takes 2-3 weeks to really detox from most of that stuff....