[happydaze]

Hello we are adopting a little girl with possible diagnosis of Asperger's, while I do know what it is and my neice has a different autism specturm disorder, I would like to hear from parents who have had experience with a child who has this disorder, especially young children. She is only two and so they are not sure, she does have certain compulsions, spins etc. She makes eye contact and is very affectionate, she just started walking, does not talk, only grunts. To me it sounds like a sensory integration issue, but I know they all overlap. Any advice/info would be appreciated. We meet with her social worker tommorow and then will start the transition. We are so happy to meet her nad have her join our family! Thank you

[happydaze]

Well it turns out she does not have Aspergers, long story about wrong info, conflicting infor, files not updated, but she has 2 reare genetic disorders among many, many other medical problems that are beyond our capacity to care for right now. This was a foster/adopt program although she is legally free. However we were not able to accept placement, which broke our hearts and is sad for all involved, especially the child. We hope that there will be another placement for us, and a family for her who gets the correct info before they make a decision.

[yael]

This must be very hard for you, having all that energy going in one direction only to have things change. I pray that you will have the right placement for your family soon.
Yael

[saj]

Dear Happydaze.
I am so sorry for your loss. I know that a failed adoption (for what ever reason) can be as difficult as the loss of an expected birth. I respect your decision in knowing that you are not able to parent a child with such profound medical needs, and I applaud your courage to make the right choice for your family and the little girl. She will find the right match for her, and you will too. Good luck as you await your own special child. I am currently going through the foster to adopt program in my state. I have already adopted twice and had two failed adoptions.
Sincerely,
Saj

[happydaze]

Thank you all for your kind words, it has been quite a roller coaster ride. It was unreal, they even had shown us a picture of a different child in training classes, and not only were the childs files not updated, but there were two pages of a different childs info in there. We still believe we should be involved in this program, we still believe that we can be of use to a child, and that some point another child will join our family. It has just been such a mess that I am trying to still trust the social workers and their info, I know that the system is messed up and they are frustrated as well. Saj, how has the foster to adopt program been for you? I have a few friends who have been through it and while it was not easy, and they had to wait it out, in the end they were able to adopt the kids. Supposedly in our state they have a high rate of the legal risk resulting in adoption. Today I am calling social workers again trying to be referred back to the program. It always takes about 6 calls to get one question answered!

[kalynn]

Happydaze, stick with it. We were offered the placement on fostor/adopt of a 3 yr. boy. We accepted and the day we brought him home (after a 6 week transiton) he was legally freed! Instead of signing for fostor/adopt we signed for straight adoption. Nerve racking, but it has all worked out. It happens eventually. Good luck, Kalynn

[happydaze]

Thanks for your kind words, crazily anough last week we were called by 2 different social workers one was for an infant, the other a sibling group of 2 , a preschooler and a toddler. We are meeting the siblings this week and are very excited. They are recruiting for adoption TPR is a month away. You never know when one door closes, where another will open. Everything has moved so quickly, what a ride! I hope this is it! By the way last poster, we have the same name mine is spelled different