[Graham]

From a discussion on a previous thread, the issue of firesettig came up. I have some experience on the subject, and would much appreciate all of your thoughts on adopting a child who has actually set a fire (not just played with matches). It does, in fact, happen all the time. Safety and crisis plans can be designed to reduce risk and also enhance trust, and a relationship that is only as attached as the child can safely accept.

The trouble is, these children are routinely disenfranchised from adoption because of what they once were compelled to do.

Social workers are the worst culprets in not placing these children ever again. Your thoughts are appreciated.

Graham

[lucyjoy]

It's tuff to live with a fire setter. We have more then the average number of smoke detectors. I had to get use to an electric stove because he was intrigue by theflames on the gas stove. No matches or lighters for birthday candles or cooking on the grill.
I had to search my son for lighters and matches if we'd been in a store or someone else's house or even to school.

I do think fire setters are very different from other disturbed children. The social worker left information out of my son's file about the fires he set before coming here. I was able to get those records later after an attempted fire.

He's doing better, no fires in 3 years. But will he be able to forget about the thrill he feels and the power of watching the flames destroy? I don't know. Would I take another fire setter? I don't know. I'd have to think pretty hard. My son set his first fire at four and the second the same year. He almost died because he wanted to stay and watch the flames. His older brother saved him. He tried 3 fires here the 4 years he stayed before his 17 months in an RTC. He didn't set any there and none here since his return home this past December.

Although attachment treatment does help treat the origins of the problem, I haven't seen much in the way of treatment for the fire setting itself.

[Sharon]

I know absolutely nothing about children who set fires, or why they do it... but the subject intrigues me.
I wonder, has anyone ever considered letting these children experiment with fire in a controlled environment, under adult supervision? After all, it won't always be possible to monitor them or keep them away from matches. Do they outgrow the need to set fires after awhile? Does addressing the underlying issues (sexual abuse or whatever) in therapy ultimately cure them of their desire to burn things? Just wondering...
` Sharon

[Lilathe]

Lucy,
There are programs specifically targetted towards the fire-starting behaviors. They are normally through the local fire marshalls office or the nearest big town office.
There are also home video and instruction packets for parents of firestarters that live too far from any program to attend.

Here is a link to one program

http://www.springsgov.com/Page.asp?NavID=1104


As to the question, fire-starting has an underlying cause. If the underlying cause can be treated, and the behavior stopped. Of course the child should be available for adoption.

There are varying degrees of the intensity of the fire-starting behaviors though. Just like the list for the difference between a sexually reactive child and a sexual perpetrator.....

there is a difference between children who start fires and plan them out days in advance with the intent to destroy and the child that acts out of "I am (hurting, angry, confused etc) and stumbles across the matches and sets a fire.

I have met some very "successful in life" adults that were juvenile firestarters. So it can be treated.


We did decide to disrupt our adotpive placement, but not just because of the firestarting.
The scarry part of his fire-starting was ----the planning involved to start the fires, the intent days beforehand, the having another child bring matches to school, hiding the matches in the hem of the pants so that I couldn't find them. The intensity of desire to start a fire at all costs, his almost setting himself purposely on fire (lighting the blanket he was under on fire), was more than I felt safe for the other children in home.

[Graham]

I completely agree Lilathe. Sadly, the "risk" in placing a child with any history involving fires is often enough for workers to think twice about actively pursuing an adoption opportunity. I've been indirectly guilty of this. When I ran our State's first truly therapeutic foster care and adoption agency for many years we had a policy of not accepting a child with a firesetting history, for legal liability reasons. Of course if the history emerged later, or a firesetting event occurred (it happened for two families over 14 years), we did not give up on the child and worked intensively with safety plans and focused on the all-important underlying issues. The fire departments varied in their approach to the problem. Some used supportive education and others took the "scared straight" approach. As Lilathe rightly says, the extent of the prior planning that was involved is an important part of the risk asessment that any family and professional must do. I have to add that, personally, it is also the extent of disregard for the harm done to others that can be chilling in the extreme. I believe that therapy groups for children with the behavior, or propensity, could be very helpful in prevention, but only in the largest cities are there likely to be enough candidates for such groups to be available on a regular basis. Once again, residential care does not seem to be the answer. All the firesetters I have known, or had described to me, in addition to their original trauma, were also dealing with issues of resistance to parental attachment. Group homes don't help with that.

Thanks for all the feedback everyone.
Graham

[lucyjoy]

Lilathe,

Thanks for the link. I did investigate a program through the fire department once, but my son is such a planner/plotter that the program scared me. I was afraid he'd get more ideas on how to set bigger fires.

Graham, I like the group therapy approach provided it could be designed not to give new ideas to planners.

I do think the kids should be adoptable, but all information about fire seting needs to be provided to the parents for safety reasons.

I'm going to investigate the fire department again and check with a local foster parent group and some mental health professionals and see if we can develop a group in our area. Thanks for the ideas.

[louise]

it is frightening to social workers who are supposed to know about these things and have the answers to fixing the problem!

I would be reluctant to knowingly take a child with this propensity. My reluctance could be eased, I think, with a comprehensive safety plan, 24 hour assistance in the home (particularly at night), intensive support by way of interventions, therapy, group support for the child and adequate respite. I would also think that a placement such as this might be more successful in a home with older children who could also be support and are likely to not be as fearful of a firesetter as much younger kids.