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The first step you need to take is to go to the library or bookstore and read up about adoption. You can take three different routes: International adoption, Domestic (state) adoption, or private adoption. I will say that if you do a state adoption, your chances of getting a white infant as a single parent are nill. So your better choices would be internation, at a cost of over $10,000, or private, which varies widely in cost. You will certainly be spending in the thousands, however. Also, you will probably have to give up the whole 'blue eyes' thing. You usually can't tell what color the baby's eyes will be until they are born, and most private adoptions match birth mother and adoptive parent prior to birth, although there are plenty of cases in which the adoptive parent is chosen after the baby is born. But are you going to say no to parenting a beautiful little baby just because he or she has brown eyes?
I will also say that most people want to adopt for the joy, love and experience of parenting and loving a child. Many people do want children who are their same race in order to ease feelings of fitting in and belonging. But I must say I question describing the baby right down to eye color. What is more important - being a loving parent, or having a baby who fits into the perfect picture in your mind? I have to tell you, that picture will never become a reality, no matter what the baby looks like. Life is uncertain, and we never get exactly what we planned on getting. Sometimes, we get something better!
If you are truly interested in adoption, focus on parenting and the type of child you can parent best, regardless of eye color. And research, research, research.
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12-04-2002, 02:00 PM
Thinking of adoption
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