[wellnow]

Ok..I have been contemplating adoption(domestic) for years now and it always seems that something comes up to interrupt my plans...

First time, I was getting my Master's degree and didn't have time to work full time, go to school full time and take the PRIDE classes...ok, that was understandable...

Then it became that I could never save enough money to get out of debt...(I'm going through the state so my adoption costs will be minimal...but still wanted to be somewhat debt-free, not counting student loans)....didn't happen...

Now it's just like I can't seem to get ahead in the financial area...being single with no kids, I am being KILLED in taxes and seems like my check isn't what it use to be(put mildly )...

I know that I can provide for a child and I do have a good support system but I am scared to even pursue it because CPS may look at me and laugh me out the office...I don't have a "cushion" in my bank account and these days it seems like my paycheck is spent the same day...

I think I should just give up the dream of adopting and just accept the fact, that I'll never be ready (nor good enough) to pass the test...

I really need some words of encouragement here...or should I just forget it?

[ocracoke]

If this is something that you want to do then do not give up. Find a way to make it happen. I was basically debt free (except for school loans) when I started my adoption but I am not longer debt free. Taxes get much better when you adopt a kid - single to head of house hold (not that that is a reason to adopt). If you are waiting for the "right" time then you will never adopt. If you are wanting to do this then jump in and start. If CPS laughs you out of the office -- find a different way to make your dream happen. Good luck,
Samantha

[sheababy]

I agree with ocracoke - if you wait for the right time it will never happen! I would sit down and come up with a budget as to how you would manage once you have a child. Will you have to pay for daycare? Clothing? Food? Once you have this on paper, you can confidently walk into CPS and if they have a question regarding finances, you are ready to answer.

Chances are you will qualify but if not, you will find out exactly what you need to do to qualify in the future.

Good luck!

[FullQuiverMamma]

Having kids will make you spend your money differently!!! And you will have a deduction. If we waited til we got good enough - well we would never have kids.

Be encouraged, pray about helping a child in need - there are so many of them. Also, PRIDE classes may hep you sort some of that out.

[txwannabemom]

Well- I am a single woman, in the midst of a masters degree and hopefully a future phd. I will never be out of school. I am a pre-K teacher. I am paid next to nothing and teach private art classes that make up one third of my yearly pay. That being said- It still isnt a lot. It's a little. Very little. What I have is LOVE, resourceful nature and commitment. And I am adopting an older child. In TX anychild over 2 and minorty, over 6 and white, a part of a sibling group or any child with "special" medical or emotional needs qualifies for a slew of subsidies including a monthly stipend after they have been adopted to help with thier care. AND a paid for college education at any public TX college- through medical or law school if they want. AND they come with Medicaid Insurance. I have not been laughed out yet. And I think they are looking for people who can make it work, it's not dependent on income. Some people can't finance life on $100,000 a year, it's all relative. I encourage you to try it. The worst thing they can say is not right now, the best thing that could happen is you could be a mom.

[Nursie222]

I am single also, I am in the midst of getting a 3rd degree and I have students loans also. They didn't laugh at me. Something will always come up because that is just the way life goes. Good luck

[wellnow]

Thanks everyone for the encouraging words...I am going to continue my plans to foster/adopt...I was just having a "self-doubt" moment and will have more to come I'm sure...

I don't want to let my fear turn to regret later in life...I don't know what the "cost" would be associated with a child so I will come up with a few different scenarios to budget with...I want an infant/toddler so I will talk to other parents as well....

thanks again!

[bethy724]

I am single foster/adoptive mom & IT CAN WORK!!! It is a lot of hard work & you'll encounter a lot of negative people - you have to WANT it & can do it!

[Suzeb1]

What really helped me was to get information on all the additional costs that come with a child (child care, healthcare, diapers, etc, etc) Then, I "redid" my taxes as if I had been head of household with a dependent. After that, it was just a bit of math to figure out what I could manage.

Being a mom is wonderful, so I don't want to discourage you at all! But, being a mom who can pay the bills and isn't scared about supporting her child is even better. If that means living on nothing for a year before you adopt, so that you have a safety net...that might be something you want to do.

Best of luck,
Susan

[wellnow]

I decided to go for it...I sent my paperwork from my information meeting off to the agency a couple of weeks ago..now I am waiting hear back from them...with the holidays I am sure this is their "slow" time with vacations and all....

Keeping my fingers crossed...hopefully I will have a training date soon!!!!!!!!!

[sheababy]

Congratulations!

[wellnow]

Originally Posted by wellnow

I decided to go for it...I sent my paperwork from my information meeting off to the agency a couple of weeks ago..now I am waiting hear back from them...with the holidays I am sure this is their "slow" time with vacations and all....

Keeping my fingers crossed...hopefully I will have a training date soon!!!!!!!!!

Well I decided to email CPS to find out how long it normally takes to process paperwork..I wasn't expecting a response but I got one about 20 mins later...they have my paperwork and are just waiting on my criminal background check to come through, which she said may be on Monday....

I'm not gonna get over-excited right now but this is good news!!!!!!!!!!

[desertmom2b]

I was hesitant at first, too. Living paycheck to paycheck and then adding a child into the picture??? When I sat down and looked at how I had been spending my paychecks over the last year, I realized I blow a huge amount of it on stuff that is not necessarily needed. Although an infant/toddler sounds like the way to go, I didn't want to worry about the expenses of diapers, child care, special toddler/baby foods, etc. I decided to go for a child in elementary school....preferably kindergarten - 1st grade age. This way they are in school all day and my elementary school has an after school program for kids whose parents work. It's $30 per week, but single parents automatically qualify for it to be free. Sweet deal!!

I do my final HS visit tomorrow morning and then am just waiting on Licensing to come visit me. Am getting so excited!

[DannieAS]

I am in the middle of it all and my classes start first week of January (already did orientation...paperwork for state, fingerprints cleared...state and county, initial interview...more paperwork)

I also feared my finances, lost my 'cushion' due to buying a house, but soul searched and decided that there really wasn't the "perfect" time to do it. If you feel the tug, at least try. That's what I'm doing

[sugarmuffin]

I am a single adoptive mom and I just want to encourage you. You can do it and everyone is right there is no right time. God always makes a way and you will manage.

Tuesday is Francine's finalazation date. God is good