[mckenna]

i agree with nawlin's mom, i just posted about my son's issues cuz indy did. talk about following the crowd, isn't that something i am teaching my son not to do

[Star_Gazer]

I am a single mom to two wonderful sons who are now 17 and 14. My oldest came to live with me the same month he turned 12 and my youngest came around 11 ½ years old.

I'm wanting to adopt again and I got the call today that we have been selected for a boy that will be 11 next month!!
So hopefully soon I’ll have three sons!

I have been talking to the worker for a few months now, but they were not in a hurry as they wanted to place during the summer.
The presentation should be later this month.
I’m so excited that they finally are ready to move forward!

[Indy]

When I posted originally, I wanted people out there to read and maybe identify with me and my sons. I agree, our children are more than a diagnosis. God help us if they weren't! I also wanted to let people know that there are others "out here" that are dealing with some of the same issues and maybe collectively, we can help each other.

From my own personal experience, many single parents (at least men) adopt older children. With older children, comes more baggage, issues, and diagnosis. I recognize that we have a "special needs" forum. I believe that as single parents, we have to deal with things differently. We don't have a husband, wife, or partner to share the pain, hurt, or happiness.

Cynthia, did I in a round about way answer your question?

I have always said this...if I ever offend send me a PM...tell me so. I take "redirect" well!

[radkat]

Hi , I'm Kat
I'm 32 years old. I have one adopted daughter who was adopted at age 4 (she just turned 11) I also have 3 foster-to-adopt children. K and K are 6 year old twin girls and their brother V is 9. They have been in my home for almost 2 years. We're hoping (and praying) to finalize by the end of this month.

I've been a foster parent for 8 years I've fostered 14 children, mostly long-term placements. I also work fulltime as a janitor.

Nice to "meet" everyone ,

Kat

[gregorysparents]

Hey Indy.....how 'bout it.....looks like there are some other's that think you need to add a little girl to your family!!!

[SavannahGirl]

Hi Everyone,

I'm the 38 year old AA single mother of a four month old AA baby girl adopted through a private domestic adoption. She came home at one month and is the joy of my life. I'm still adjusting to motherhood and working full-time. She's now laughing and playing which is alot of fun. Looking forward to my first mothers day on Sunday, sleeping through the night, and finalization sometime this summer.

[Original Mike]

Hello, I'm Mike. I'm 35 and am what friends call "terminally single". I live in Northern Indiana and describe myself as "more Addams Family than Brady Bunch". We live in a large house in the country along with our Amazon Parrot and our Mini-Lop Rabbit (who thinks she's a cat).

I adopted my son C from Ohio when he was 12 1/2. he's 16 now and a pretty good kid. he struggles with ADD as well as the aches and pains of being a teenager. He's a great kid and I'm (usually) pretty proud of him.

We're in the process of possibly taking a 16 yo from Ohio who may or may not move in. he says he wants to, but I'm not holding my breath until he does. he's a great kid with a lot of potential but a pretty horrific past as well as some PTSD issues. We've been visitng for almost two months, so he'll have to make a decision soon.

We're also being looked at for T, a 15yo here in Indiana. This kid is, according to his team, exceedingly bright with a warped sense of humor. T doesn't really trust women, so they're thinking a single dad might be his best option.

So, I'm not really sure how many I've got at the moment. I should know more by the first week of June.

As far as talking about our kids' diagnoses, I see it as something that comes with the territory of adopting older kids. When you take a teenager (or tween), you're going to be getting issues. I think it's important to use this forum as an information tool for hose considering it. Too often, well-meaning people take older kids thinking "love can fix everything". Love is wonderful, but it takes more to help our kids move beyond their pasts.

These forums are great.

[jumpingfroggy]

Hello All!

I am a 29 year old single mother. I have an 8-year old bio-daughter. She and I are currently working on completing our homestudy. We hope to add another daughter to the family. C's very excited but has indicated that her only requirement is that she is going to be a big sister, not a little sister.

I have been a "lurker" for about three months now and reading about everyone's trials and triumphs has been a great encouragement. I am sure that once a child has been placed with us you will be hearing a lot from me. If there is one thing I have learned from all of you already, it's that the advise of those who have been there before and survived can help preserve my sanity .

[Indy]

Not sure if our minds survived intact... But anything that doesn't kill me makes me stronger, right???

Welcome to the forum....!

[waitinginnj]

Hi all - I am a single mom of one daughter. She has been home from Russia about 18 months and is currently 3 1/2.

I don't anticipate any more children, but I love my little one. I have met some wonderful people through adoption and would love to join in here too.

We live on the NJ Shore. I work in HR for a large Financial Services company.

My daughter came with some diagnosis (minimal for a Russian adoption), which were all false. She is a typical three year old. Storng willed and roaring to go.

You all put me to shame with all the children you can handle - I admire you.

[cynthia900]

Hi all,

Indy - I didn't take offense at the posts and I hope that my question was not offensive -it just struck me that it was the first time I had seen intro posts like that and I wondered if I could learn something from it. My oldest has some issues but I don't normally think of including it in a description of our family so it interested me...inquiring minds you know.

It is great to meet so many single parents in the adoption world.

Cynthia

[moelladeville]

Hi,
I've adopted two wonderful boys from Guatemala. I had begun the process considering adopting an older child from the US, but being single with a hectic work schedule, I didn't think I could handle children who had been faced with the obstacles imposed by the US foster-care system (this decision was made after approval and training within the IL foster care system). I am so in awe of those of you who have done it. Wow. You are all incredible.

[sienna5]

Hi all.

I have been monitoring this board for awhile but this is the first time I've posted. I am 46 and a newbe. I just really started looking at adoption the first of this year and now am completely obsessed. It is the old saying, the easiest person to fool is yourself. For some years now I have been nesting without thinking about it. I totally remodeled an old victorian playhouse, when I moved I set out to create a kids room in the new house - all for some kids that were going to somehow show up but I never thought about them being mine. One person remarked that a kids room wasn't that practical when my nieces and nephews are only here about a week or two a year. At Christmas, I hosted most my extended family including four kids. My sister made the comment "I bet you can't wait to get rid of all these kids". That is when it really hit me - no - I have been waiting for them to be here. I used to travel a lot for my job and kids, as a dedicated single, were pretty much out of the question. When I changed my schedule, I did not really think about how it was changing my life and my options.

So now, I am actively looking at international adoption. I am not completely set on a country yet - kind of drawn to Kaz. I am going to Portand to meet with Heritage International - if anyone has used them please PM me with any feedback. And I am reading every book I can get my hands on and taking online courses. I still am not sure where it will all end, but it is the most exciting (and scariest) journey I've started in many years.

Some folks on the Kaz site where mentioning how depressing Mother's Day was - and I can see their point. But I actually felt a bit in awe - it could be the last one that I am not a Mother - wow.

I've really liked reading this thread - and realizing I don't have to worry too much about being over the hill. Thanks!

[missw005]

Originally Posted by sienna5

I've really liked reading this thread - and realizing I don't have to worry too much about being over the hill. Thanks!

Sienna5 -
Nah, you're only couple of years older than Indy and he's a big geezer (ask his boys!)
(just kidding Indy)
Anyway, welcome to the singles forum - where the posts are honest and down-n-dirty and the people are real!
(some of them baby people just get out of hand with all that wishy washy mushy stuff)
Welcome aboard!

Sandy

[MamaTo6]

I am a single ( w boyfriend) mom of 5 grown bios, 4 grown women 1 man, ages 20-26 yrs old. I am 44. I also have 5 of the cutest grd kids ever. Last yr a situation presented itself where I would take in a new born for a short duration... as a favour to bmom. Baby was apprehended at birth by CCAS, mom would work hard, baby would go home, kind of situation. Thirteen moths later, I have completed home study, tpr is next week and now Im a mommy again. Was it in my plans?? NO way!!! Would I change it? NO way!! Will I foster/adopt more children? GOD willing!!

Warm Wishes....Barbie