[PAUL BIENEK]

I am a 42 year old male adoptee and man, i am tired of regection, started off at 7 with the that golden cookie of "well son it's like this see, me and your dad,well we are not strictly your real mum & dad but we chose you and you are a special child". The following Xmass she ran off with some skinny chef from Wales. Next up my adopted dad (bless him for being there) gets the cancer and dies when I was 33. So I'm thinking maybe i will search now, a week later i had all the information. I gave it to some go between women at the adoption agency and she set up a meeting with bio-mother. Yea it went pretty well for a while 'cept she had not told her husband and 3 other children about me.(2 older 1 younger). What she did tell them was that she had a baby but it had died in a fire. Anyway I hate lies and I was not prepared to carry on being the dead baby so after a couple more meetings i decided to call a halt to it. A year later though old anxieties raise there head again and I thought that maybe her children had a right to know the truth. If they did not want to meet me that was there choice. Cut a long long long one short I met them all and none of them had spoken to each other for years and all of this dys-funtional bunch wanted to get to me first and run each other down. I gets the odd Xmass card now and again and cling on to it like a newborn baby. I hate regection but i now know it's not my fault, after all i never asked to be born!

[annelizly]

i feel for ya!

I get what you mean. I am sick of rejection also. I did not ask to be born. no one told my bmom to have casual sex and get pregnant. why is it that all the sympathy is saved for the whory bmom? the baby though? just a piece of **** for even THINKING about wanting to know its genetic history.

[never_good_enough]

yep rejection sucks, especially when it comes from every direction using the same words before the rejection. I love you but......! Who can ya trust anymore? If youre Bmom lets em take you, I suspect whatever she says after that is suspect, if Amom never names you except to call you "Our Adopted Son", and your wife says because of your issues due to your adoption I have never been in the marrige 100% after 25 years, WTF ya gonna believe anymore? Religion? My records are hidden by the Catholic Church, I cant even get a baptism record without paying those greedy child molesters off. And then I need my OBC anyway for them, so there ya go a coincidence? I think not, its conspiracy between those that stand to profit that's all. Call me angry and I say HELL YES! Bitter HELL YES, just tired of the game and willing to let em win? not yet!

[bobd]

Well i understand completely. For years I was depressed , angry and alone. I felt like an outsider even when in the middle of things. I will be 50 in 2 weeks the one thing I have decided to do is move on with my life. The heck with everyone else. I am going to make my own life. If I may give some advice from someone that has made alot of mistakes in his life. Make your own life and identity I sspent too much time lonely and angry. It cost me family, friends and a career. You need to make your own life. What is it you want to be and go and be that person. You don't have to be what others want you to be. Afterall you are who you are whether you know your bparents or not. Make your own history and the hell with what everyone else wants. Start living, you only have one life make it worth while. Take care and God bless!