[plants]

i think whats really interesting is that when an adoption agency puts a child into a not so loving home they dont seem to be to cocerned about it

[babygirlCA]

I really wish there had been an "out" for my aparents...my amom found out she was pg before my adoption was final...I think she would have welcomed a way to return me since I wasn't needed anymore...I say that because that is exactly how I was treated, as if I was just in the way and wasn't needed, a burden...a burden that her children would always be better than!

[txscrapbooks]

Originally Posted by babygirlCA

I really wish there had been an "out" for my aparents...my amom found out she was pg before my adoption was final...I think she would have welcomed a way to return me since I wasn't needed anymore...I say that because that is exactly how I was treated, as if I was just in the way and wasn't needed, a burden...a burden that her would always be better than!

I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling that way. I have never been in your situation, so I can't say that I can relate. I can tell you that not all adoptive parents are that way. I'm truly sorry that your adoptive parents treated you that poorly. I would be absolutely thrilled to be able to adopt, no matter what. I love children and have only been given the gift of one. She's my miracle girl. My hubby and I are in the process of foster/adopt from CPS. We are just waiting on the call as we were just recently licensed. Please know that while your adoptive mom may have treated you poorly, we aren't all that way.

[plants]

i think my adoptive parents would have liked to have taken me back but felt like they couldnt because the adoption was final but i do feel like they wish they could have given me back to the agency thats the way they made me feel

[txscrapbooks]

Originally Posted by plants

i think my adoptive parents would have liked to have taken me back but felt like they couldnt because the adoption was final but i do feel like they wish they could have given me back to the agency thats the way they made me feel

I'm so sad to hear that you felt that way. It's a shame. Cling to your statement in your signature. It's great that you can find that truth in yourself.

[plants]

well thats good to hear txscrapbooks i think there are good adoptive parents but i didnt get one of those i wish icould have because maybe i would have looked at adoption better rather than so negatively

[MrsHoot]

I replied to you on your other thread but again I just want to how sorry I am that you were treated that way. IMHO most BP's never imagine that the children we are placing will be put into such situations...it breaks my heart and I'm so sorry that you have had such a bad adoption expreience.

[txscrapbooks]

Originally Posted by plants

well thats good to hear txscrapbooks i think there are good adoptive parents but i didnt get one of those i wish icould have because maybe i would have looked at adoption better rather than so negatively

I am truly sorry that your situation causes you this pain. I hope to someday be able to be one of those good adoptive parents. Hopefully soon. My heart aches for kids who just need a loving home.

[babygirlCA]

txscrapebook,

Thank you very much for your comments...I have another bsister that bmom reliquished and we are reunited...her aparents were and still are the best parents, whenever we are in their area we stop by and visit. Since this bsister is 8 years my junior, I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Meeting and getting to know her aparents has definitely restored my faith in the fact that there are excellent aparents out there...this doesn't mean that my bsister still didn't have problems...it does mean that her aparents were ready to assist and support my bsister through anything...the way that all good parents do.

[ter202]

Originally Posted by MrsHoot

I replied to you on your other thread but again I just want to how sorry I am that you were treated that way. IMHO most BP's never imagine that the children we are placing will be put into such situations...it breaks my heart and I'm so sorry that you have had such a bad adoption expreience.

i am sorry for how you were treated ihad apretty good adopted family but i still need to know where i came from good or bad. I hope that you and your family can work through all of this just remeber there are people who care about you.

[Pommom]

I was adopted 15 years after my aparents bson. I never was good enough in my amoms eyes and always compared to my brother even though he moved away when I was only 3. When I was 6 yrs old I remember and always will my amom yelling to my dad that she was sorry she ever mentioned adoption to him. Even at 6 yrs old I knew what she ment and it still hurts to this day. Nobody in my afamily ever told me that they loved me until I moved away at 25 yrs old then my mom would say Love you on the phone when she hung up. That was the first time. I do however believe that they did because they were always the parents helping w/Girl Scouts and stuff like that. It just hurts knowing for some reason at 6 yrs old I hadn't measured up to her expectations.

I found my Bfamily last month and bmom only talks to me when 5 year older bsister in not home so she doesn't feel jealous. Bbrother does email me but, he is caught in the middle because him and bsister are close, as well as my stepsister from my bdad she is jealous of me talking to bbrother.

It just seem I can't win with either family

I'm so confused on my feelings but, do feel the same as you w/afamily mostly amother.
Hang in there and keep posting it helps.