[tracybr]

hello everyone. i have just recently found out from my brother that i am adopted. i am 26 and since high school have always wondered if i was adopted. i don't really know how to ask my parents if it's true. my brother was adopted also and was told from the beginning. he says after they adopted me, it was never talked about again. he has always known about me being adopted and asumed that i knew as well. i have younger sister that was not adopted and i have talked to her about it. she couldn't believe it. well, sorry for rambleing but, i figured if you knew alittle of the story you could help me better.
thank you
tracy

[Just Julie]

I would talk with your brother and sister first sharing everything you know and have suspected. Ask them to please share with you everything they know. Tell them that you plan to talk with your parents soon and see if they have any advice about how to approach them. Maybe the three of you would want to talk with them together. After all, it seems to be a family secret for some reason. Are there any health concerns for your parents or any other reason to proceed cautiously? If not and you have many questions or want to search, go for it! It's your life and you have the right to know anything you want to know. God bless.

[lori.maghan]

i'm almost your age (27) so i could relate to how you're feeling. i found out when i was 4 or 5 and met my b-families about 6 years ago. you are probably very confused right now--you're hurt that they didn't tell you, happy they did, mad at any other family member, etc. nobody can tell you how to feel or what you should feel. that is up to you. back in 1976, 77, and 78, adoption was something that wasn't discussed. it was done but the b-parents didn't really have a say in anything. my b-mother never got to hold me, she just saw me through glass. i would definitely ask your parents if you are. you are at the age you may want to settle down, get married, raise children. but to do that you want to know your family history. that's for your protection and your health. my adoptive mother was never too keen on the idea of me talking about being adopted or finding my families. i went through a mid life crisis at the age of 15. i had no identity. i needed to know who i looked like, where i got my crooked finger from, my big child-bearing hips. i found all of this out. i had a hole in my heart and didn't really know it was there until it was filled. i'm not saying your parents didn't raise your right--i'm sure they did. they wanted to protect you and that is every parents worst fear--that the birth family(ies) are horrible rotten people. i think that you need to do what's right for you, so i hope this helped. let me know what happens.