[111359]

I was wondering, do you think the nonidentifying info that you send your money for is the truth because My adopted mom told me many years ago that my birth mom was around 30 when she had me, and different stuff, but when I contacted the agency to ask her name and age and stuff they told me that she was 25 and told me her name first name only but, for some reason, I don't beleive this info, they also told me that I would have to pay for the rest of the nonidentifying info file. Do you think that they alter this some what and why, did anyone eles gets false info? I just don't know if I want to waste my money and it not be the truth. what would you do? Thanks for listening. from Mississippi.

[shirleyville]

My non-id info was 100% correct -- although, in Indiana, you don't have to pay to get it.
Realistically speaking, the story my a-family told me was the false one.......
That's just my own experience, tho.....I know of other people who have found false or altered information in their files.
Best of Luck,
Sally

[snuffie]

My non id is a combination of the true and untrue. The wrong nationality is listed in it, my bmom's eyes were not "deep brown" but were bright blue, and they have told me not to hold too much weight in the name listed as my birthfather.

I know that other people's non id have been totally true. I think it depended on the era, what the birth mom shared with them and in some cases who the social worker was.

[marni01]

almost everything in my Cal info was the same thing my mom had told me as I was growing up. I just got firmer dates of siblings.

[Ravencadwell]

I looked into the agency that my adoption was through, and they want to charge me $600 for non-identifying info and 2 search for any contact info. How do I know that anything they give me is true? I still feel that it is a scam to charge this much, someone is making $ off of it.

My problem is that according to what I know I'm Irish and Cherokee indian, but my adoption was in the same year as the Indian Child Welfare act, which states that for me to be adopted the agency would have to get permission from the tribal council. Well, what if they didn't do that? I don't see the agency incriminating themeselves of violating federal law, so I'm not holding my breath that what I get from them is the truth.

The whole point is that you have no way of knowing.

[LMNGambino]

Originally Posted by Ravencadwell

I looked into the agency that my adoption was through, and they want to charge me $600 for non-identifying info and 2 search for any contact info. How do I know that anything they give me is true? I still feel that it is a scam to charge this much, someone is making $ off of it.

My problem is that according to what I know I'm Irish and Cherokee indian, but my adoption was in the same year as the Indian Child Welfare act, which states that for me to be adopted the agency would have to get permission from the tribal council. Well, what if they didn't do that? I don't see the agency incriminating themeselves of violating federal law, so I'm not holding my breath that what I get from them is the truth.

The whole point is that you have no way of knowing.

this is despicable. No one should charge that kind of money for non-id info. Non id- info is usually made up by the agency, and it usually only contains bits and pieces of the truth. RARELY will non-id info help anyone in a search.
Im sorry you are having someone trying to take advantage of you.

[Caedwyn]

You're kidding, right??? Non-ID info is RARELY the truth - sometimes because the agency lies, sometimes because the birthmother's lied to them. Until you get the actual records & find the birth family, treat it as if it's nothing but B.S. - because it probably is.

[Mackie]

I can only speak for OHIO. I have been doing Adoptee/birthparent searches for many years and the CURRENT non-id-info is the first thing I ask for.

Without it, its almost impossible to find a birth mother.
if the info is good stuff.
If you have no idea what her height, hair color, eye color etc is how do you know when you find her? Also its wonderful to know if the birth mother was single[meaning never married] or had been married and divorced or what her marital status was when the child was born.

I hate it when they give a whole bunch of info on the birth father [knowing the birth fathers name is seldom if ever on the birth index.] unless the couple is married.

Of course I know OHIO is different than a lot of states in that we have the Birth Index and Supplemental Index that we use.

So maybe it wold always be best to specify what state you are referring to when mentioning these things.........it makes those searching think that is the way it is all over the world.
Blessings
Mackie

Originally Posted by Caedwyn

You're kidding, right??? Non-ID info is RARELY the truth - sometimes because the agency lies, sometimes because the birthmother's lied to them. Until you get the actual records & find the birth family, treat it as if it's nothing but B.S. - because it probably is.

[pcata8888]

Hi, I'm from Mass. The contact I just spoke with at The Dept of Childrens and Families told me that back in the sixties that some of the info that they gave the adoptive parents was "just to make them feel better". They were, and in turn, I was told I was Irish, French and Italian. When in reality not Italian but English. My adoptive family is Italian. In my state you can now get your original birth certificate and information from DCF even though the court records are still sealed. I have learned a whole lot of info in the last few weeks. It's hard to process it all after 42 years. I know my bio parents names and my original name. I just keep staring at the info like it's not real.

[SuddenlySusan]

Non-identifying info can be correct, full of lies, or anywhere inbetween. As Ravencadwell said above, you have no way of knowing. The agency listed my first son's ndad as being a twin (both males), which was incorrect. Ndad didn't even have a brother. Go figure...

Best of luck to you with your new information, pcata8888.

Susan

[loveajax]

My DH recently "reconnected" (by email) with his birth mom (we all live in MA). Surprisingly, all of the info on the non-ID stuff was true....except that the non-id said that both of his birth mom's parents were dead (and the mom was still alive...maybe his birth mom was too "afraid" to say so? I don't know).

I think it is a real crapshoot. Btw, my DH was able to "track down" his birth mom based on the nonID info (this was before access to OBCs) so it may be worth getting? Good luck to everyone. It is soooooo utterly ridiculous to me that adoptees do not have access to their OBCs. Ack.

[sister7]

The non ID is only as good as the info that was given - or manufactured! As a search angel I know that some agencies told the adoptive parents lies about the birth parents. I also know that some non ID is completely true. You don't know until you find the person.

[feb171983]

How can you find the person if the non-ID info is bogus?

I thought non-ID info was supposed to contain accurate and informative information, such as family history and medical history.