[epic]

We have four children living with us and three living with another parent. We are a step family.

Here is my question, the four kids we have living with us, the two oldest ones, all they want to do is chat on the internet and play video games all day long. They walk in from school and head right to the computer and will stay on it, skipping meals and not even using the bathroom until bedtime, which can be anywere up to 7 hours of use a night. While other kids in the neighborhood are playing basketball, riding bikes, playing at the park and riding skateboards, ours our sitting in the basement surfing the internet. My wife see's no problem with it and is not inclined to stop it. I see it as a problem. Does anyone else have any first had experience with this dilema? Are they being normal by all they want to do is chat and chat and chat all night long?

[lucyjoy]

Normal to want to? Yes. Normal to let them? NO.
You didn't mention their ages. I limit how long video and internet use can be and skipping meals and homework time isn't an option.

[epic]

12 - boy and 14 - girl.

the boy plays role playing games all night online with other kids and the girl chats on aol instant messanger and surfs myspace.com all night. super boy crazy.

[aspenhall]

ummmm.....it sounds like an addiction. I would limit their time to 1 hr a day, personally! My family has this addiction....the boys have all dropped out of school, and are anti-social, the girl is headed that way....think a whole family of "Napoleon Dynamite"'s except for me and my sis (2 oldest)

ANYTHING taken to that extreme is unhealthy. Think about it....

Perhaps come up with a grade based system. For each A they get an hr per day. B's get nothing C's get 1/2 hr taken AWAY! D's get 1 hr TAKEN AWAY and ANY F and you get ZERO time even if the rest are all A's.

Can you enroll them in something like Karate, or Swim lessons ??

A 14 yr old girl on MySpace is the PRIME target for pedophiles....it's all over the news right now!

[epic]

Ok. I have experienced this exact same issue. The girl got straight F's on her report card this semester and the boy has basically given up all his friends and playing outside to surf the net all day. I want to cancel the internet, but my wife says that it makes them happy to surf, so she wants to keep it. But, I agree with everything you say.

[DianeScraps]

Just curious - are they 'your' kids, 'her' kids, or 'ours'

Any way I suspect you will need to work on communication and goals with your wife, perhaps counseling